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  • Attached

  • The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
  • Written by: Amir Levine, Rachel Heller
  • Narrated by: Robert Petkoff
  • Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (1,073 ratings)

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Attached cover art

Attached

Written by: Amir Levine, Rachel Heller
Narrated by: Robert Petkoff
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Publisher's Summary

"A groundbreaking book that redefines what it means to be in a relationship." (John Gray, PhD., best-selling author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus)

We already rely on science to tell us what to eat, when to exercise, and how long to sleep. Why not use science to help us improve our relationships? In this revolutionary book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller scientifically explain why some people seem to navigate relationships effortlessly, while others struggle.

Discover how an understanding of adult attachment—the most advanced relationship science in existence today—can help us find and sustain love. Pioneered by psychologist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the field of attachment posits that each of us behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways:

  • Anxious people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back
  • Avoidant people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness.
  • Secure people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving.

Attached guides listeners in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mate) follow, offering a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections with the people they love.

*Includes a PDF of the attachment style questionnaire

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2010 Amir Levine and Rachel Heller (P)2019 Penguin Audio

What the critics say

"A groundbreaking book that redefines what it means to be in a relationship." (John Gray, PhD., best-selling author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus)

"Amir Levine and Rachel Heller have written a very smart book: It is clear, easy to read, and insightful. It's a valuable tool whether you are just entering a relationship with a new partner or—as in my case—even after you've been married 21 years, and had thought you knew everything about your spouse." (Mariette DiChristina, editor in chief, Scientific American)

"Attached is a fascinating and enormously useful guide to one of life's most important ventures—finding and sustaining a secure, satisfying love relationship. Based on 25 years of research, laced with vivid and instructive examples, and enriched with interesting and well-designed exercises, the book provides deep insights and invaluable skills that will benefit every reader." (Phillip R. Shaver, PhD, Distinguished Professor of Psychology, University of California, Davis and Past President, International Association for Relationship Research)

Editorial Review

Have you ever wished your relationships came with a handbook? Have you ever wanted to know how to attract and sustain healthy love? Then, Attached is the audiobook for you.

Typically, how we navigate our most important relationships is simply a reaction to what we have learned by observing those around us. Imagine how much better our relationships would be if we learned how to apply a more scientific approach. In Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment, neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel Heller deliver an insightful look into what makes romantic relationships tick.

Just as individual love languages affect how smoothly (or not) a love connection can run, the authors’ attachment theory explores an individual’s attachment style and how it influences who you attract and how. Avoidant people, anxious people, secure people, and everyone in between have their way of navigating connections. Understanding why we, and the people we love, identify as such is the key to creating enriching bonds.

Chock-full of questionnaires and quizzes, Attached serves as a roadmap to attaining the romantic and loving relationships every individual needs to thrive. More than a self-help book, it draws on ground-breaking scientific research to shed light on the distinct ways human attachment affects everyone and how building long-lasting, intimate relationships is critical to living a fulfilled life.

Exploring the latest advances in relationship science, Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment is a fascinating and valuable listen for anyone seeking to understand better and improve how they interact with their soulmate and all those they love.

What listeners say about Attached

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Overall informative but lacking in diversity

This book was very informative for me and I think will be very helpful in my life, I appreciated the concrete things one can do to work towards a secure attachment style. However, it was disappointing to see that a research based text could be so devoid of mentioning any sort of diversity of relationships or how culture intersects. It is annoyingly heteronormative and has a strictly monogamous view on relationships. It also doesn't take into account how other factors, such as mental health, may impact attachment styles (imo this can play a huge role).

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Very important concepts for everyone to know

The ideas in this book are incredibly important for all of us to understand, and while the book focuses primarily on romantic relationships, I believe these same concepts are also valid for friendships and even workplace interactions. Understanding other people's relationship types and tendencies can make all of your relationships better, and avoid incredibly painful situations.
While reading this book, I was immediately recognizing traits in others that I could view from an entirely different perspective. It has helped me grow in a two ways: 1) by helping me recognize when I fall into avoidant behaviours, and 2) to better understand people that have a different type than myself, particularly anxious.
I highly recommend.

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Attachment theory clearly explained

It's the second book I read on the subject and I liked it very much. Well explained, full of concrete examples. I wish there was more on how a secure person can express her needs to her avoidant partner without triggering protest behavior. There are many tips for the opposite situation (how to reassure an anxious partner), but I find it is more delicate the other way around.

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Attached

This book was light , refreshing and confirming. A must read/ listen for all effective relationships

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Life changing book

I highly recommend this book. I have read this book 7 times over 5 years. My parter also had read this book many times. We have grown more more individually after every reading. We were able recognized and understand our individual adult attachments and triggers on why we act and react they way we do. We are now in the process of growing within our romantic relationship. It is a life changing book for yourself and relationships.

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  • Bee
  • 2020-05-25

Eye opening!

Well read and Taught me so much about myself! I knew little of the attachment styles but after this I have identified what I am and why I am the way I am. A must read for anyone like myself that's had relationship problems.

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everyone needs to hear this book.

This book is packed with insights that everyone can use to improve their relationships now or in the future. Things we most likely never learn as children from our parents.

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you have to read it

this book has been the most validating and educational relationship book I've ever read. just read it, especially if you are anxious and feel unfulfilled by distant partners.

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Very Practice Book

Loved it! I picked this book because I needed more ideas for my new project. I prefer listening and reading the book at the same time. I finished this book in 4 days.

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It was transforming to my relationships

It helped me see all my relationships with more clarity and understanding, giving me more grace to deal with others with a different attachment style! My new boyfriend also has enjoyed the benefits of the teachings of this book through more of an awareness bringing us closer

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