Perhaps the thriving, wildly productive inspirational life Italia Tornabene now leads after years
of setbacks, struggles and disillusionment was foretold by her prophetic Italian surname, which
translates to “good outcome” or “to return well.” Yet the incredible, seriously surreal journey
from increasing despair to powerful breakthroughs and enduring hope she chronicles in her
cleverly titled autobiography Suits to Stilettos has a trajectory like no other.
Typical single moms sacrificing to build a stable family life for their child might turn first to sex
work to survive, then educate themselves, leave that lifestyle and build a so-called respectable
career on the straight and narrow. While working full time, Italia committed years of her life to
getting the education part down, ultimately earning three degrees - including an Associate’s in
Business Administration Management, a Bachelor’s in Legal Studies and a Master’s in Criminal
Justice. Yet with the longtime government employee ultimately finding her personal redemption
as an exotic dancer, porn star and high-level escort – in addition to her ongoing success as a
serial entrepreneur – Italia’s story is the life-affirming opposite of how these female overcomer
and empowerment narratives usually go.
To share a life story truthfully and make a deep impact on readers, nothing is more important
than an author’s freedom to be raw and vulnerable and hold nothing back. Italia’s no holds barred
approach includes harrowing descriptions of many harsh and challenging eras and milestones in
her life. To name but a few: growing up in a financially strapped household, with her parents
arguing all the time and her father (whom she otherwise loved) physically unleashing his fury on
her mom and several times on her; being raped by a co-worker at the car dealership she worked
at and the traumatic physical and emotional aftermath; giving birth to her son Dominic at 17 and
soon being abandoned by his dad, who later made her life a living hell during years of custody
battles; and dealing with horrifying corruption and institutional toxicity while working as a high-
level analyst for a prison in the California Department of Corrections.
Yet at every turn, driven by her love for Dominic and her desire to give her son the best life
possible, Italia somehow emerges from the muck, offering what she calls a “front row seat to
witness the undeniable strength of the human spirit.” The title of Chapter Three in Suits to
Stilettos says it all: “Beyond Boundaries: A Journey of Education, Sacrifice and Resilience.” One
of the main threads in both her personal and professional life working for the government
(including a lengthy stint as a Disability Insurance Program Representative for the State of
California) is a foreboding sense of injustice pervasive in a system that is supposed to provide
Americans with liberty and justice for all.
Italia’s passion for educating herself on legal issues – which ultimately led her to pursue her
degrees – was sparked in part by learning, the wake of her rape, that there was an impossible
backlog of rape kits at Kaiser – which was one of the factors that allowed the perpetrator, who
she mistakenly referred to as a onetime “friend,” to go free. The next indignity Italia suffered
was the ridiculously drawn out custody battle she had with Marco, her vindictive former husband
and father of Dominic. At every turn, for reasons she delves into in the book, the system always
seemed stacked to favor him – and they believed his lies about her being a bad, abusive mother.
And during her many years working for the government, her attempts at whistle blowing and
simply making the right, ethical choices were stymied and often led to harsh confrontations with
and rebukes by her superiors.
While Italia turned to exotic dancing – first in San Diego and then in Las Vegas – as a way to
make great money to pay her bills and give Dominic stability, it quickly became her soul’s
liberation offering a lifeline of hope amidst despair. “In a world where stress and hardships
threatened to suffocate me,” she writes, “the lights and music of the stage provided a respite. . .
Within the embrace of those beats, I found solace and renewed purpose.” She danced for a total
of 14 years while primarily working relatively low paying government jobs. During this time,
she exercised her ample entrepreneurial skills, launching and running a successful paralegal
business for several years.
By the time the pandemic hit in 2020, Italia had been happily working full time as a dancer for
several years. In a time when many of her colleagues were panicking because the clubs had
closed down, she turned fear into a portal of opportunity, launching a private housecleaning and
grout cleaning business (Magic Maids) that grew into a large operation of 65 employees,
ultimately scoring lucrative hotel accounts. After she resumed dancing, a life-threatening illness
followed by a major injury suffered at the gym led her to explore and begin attracting clientele
on multiple porn sites, which snowballed into a several year career as a porn actress.
Italia writes: “As time went on, I realized the immense power that lied within me. I was no
longer the victim; I was the master of my own destiny. Every interaction, every performance,
became an act of defiance against the pain that had held me captive for so long.” As for our
society’s often derogatory view of those who work in the porn industry and the stigma associated
with it, she says, “I wish sex wasn’t so taboo in this country. People often think it’s easy work
but actually it’s mentally exhausting and physically draining, which is why some performers turn
to drugs. I don’t know why our government is so ass backwards with laws regarding it. When I
talk to girlfriends in Amsterdam and Germany, they treat it like a regular career. It’s sex between
consenting adults. I wish our society would catch on.”
Though Italia maintains an active presence on and generates income from dozens of sites, she
has since transitioned from the porn industry to the more lucrative and higher-class world of
private escorting. Over the past year, she has also added new endeavors to her ever-fascinating
resume, becoming a high-performance life coach, a personal trainer (soon to launch a virtual
platform) and nutritionist. A successful investor for 20 years, she also recently published a book
titled Easy Investing: A Beginner’s Guide to Financial Growth. In addition to Suits and Stilettos,
Italia will soon be emerging as a fiction writer with Femme Fatale: Shades of Retribution, a
harrowing story about the tragic drug-related downward spiral of a sex performer based on a dear
friend she knew during her dancing days.
“With Suits to Stilettos, I definitely have an important story to tell that I hope can inspire people,
especially women who want to succeed against difficult odds,” says Italia. “There were times in
my life where I felt like my life was over, and I hit that rock bottom many times. But as you’ll
read, I believe when there’s a will, there’s a way, and thanks to my wonderful son Dominic, who
is now 19 and doing well in his life, I was always motivated to succeed. Everyone has a purpose
on this earth, and we all have to evolve and keep growing. I have learned that what brings me the
greatest joy isn’t making money or having material things – it’s doing anything I can to put a
smile on people’s faces and make them happy.”
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