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Narcissist and the Wendy Complex

The Women Who Are Attracted to the Narcissistic 'Peter Pan': Transcend Mediocrity, Book 93

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Narcissist and the Wendy Complex

Auteur(s): J. B. Snow
Narrateur(s): Michael Hanko
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Many people have heard about the Peter Pan Syndrome. Dr. Dan Kiley used the term in his book The Peter Pan Syndrome: Men Who Have Never Grown Up. He fondly referred to the women who were involved with these Peter Pan types as Wendy, Wendy Complex, or Wendy Syndrome. Others have even coined the epidemic of Wendy as the Wendy Club. Wendy is the character in the Peter Pan story who falls head over heels hopelessly and romantically in love with Peter Pan, even though he will never be a suitable partner for her. Peter Pan doesn't feel love, and so he only holds an immature fondness and curiosity of the girl who is so smitten with him.

Such is the plight of the girls who are attracted to the immature man. I have many such women write to me on a regular basis. They touch my heart as an author, and because I know their stories all too well. As women, our heads tell us one thing - that our man is too immature to be a good relationship partner. But our hearts are filled with awe and wonder and curiosity about him. Women dream of the knight in shining armor coming to rescue us from our boring lives. Women fall for small gestures and charismatic smiles and the visions in their heads of the perfect family in a little house with the white picket fence.

There are many reasons why we choose to be a Wendy. Many of us have grown up in homes where we were emotionally invalidated in some way. This could be because our parents were neglectful or abusive or intrusive or overindulgent. This could be due to our fathers being rigid and inflexible about our behavior or unsupportive of our goals in life. We might have been born with an especially sensitive temperament due to the makeup of our genes and our DNA.

©2015 J.B. Snow (P)2015 J.B. Snow
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