SO close to getting it.

This was a frustrating listen because Mr Behan is SO close to making a breakthrough in his understanding of dogs and behavior, and it is undermined by his own upbringing.

It is clear from his story that his household was high on discipline, low on empathy. Mr Behan obviously wasn't given names for his feelings nor did his parents help him talk through his emotions. This deprivation has led to a man who can see how much dogs are driven by emotions... and yet lacks the language capacity to discuss it clearly.

In replacement is a jumbled and confusing word salad that uses scientific jargon to explain subjective experiences, resulting in phrases like "the waveform of the bowel movement" (not kidding) and "preyful aspect".

As the biography of a man who was raised by a celebrity dog trainer and who recognized, on a subconscious level, that his father's methods were suppressive and restrictive rather than leading to true canine happiness, this book is interesting. Unfortunately these tidbits are lost in twenty minute long mixed metaphors based on Mr Behan's own personal philosophy rather than grounded in science or canine cognition.

As a dog trainer, it is clear to me that the author has a gift for seeing the dog for what it is, and seeing the flaws in his father's dominance pack nonsense - he noticed that lower ranking dogs still have the right to guard their possessions, for example, rather than relinquish them to the supposed leader.

He can also see the dog's cooperative nature and that dogs behave how they feel. Much of what he says about dog behavior is spot on.

But.

There are so many moments when it sounds like he is SO CLOSE to being self aware... and then explains it away with nonsense.

He also hasn't shaken his father's belief that well behaved means happy and well adjusted.

I gave up on this book when he described an instance of working with a dog who got aggressive when groomed. He recognized that it is not naturally comfortable for dogs to tolerate being manhandled especially by strangers and that this dog had unresolved traumas (except he calls it stress and negative charge). He also recognized that being put in a vulnerable position makes a dog feel like prey, whereas they are happier when they feel like what they are - predators.

But how did he deal with it? Did he use the dog's prey drive and positive motivations to bring a positive energy to the grooming table? Nope. Instead he put the dog on the slippery grooming table, and pulled the dog half off of the table whenever it aggressed, thus throwing the dog in a scarily precarious position.

All dog people know that dogs don't like heights or unsafe footings. Mr Behan knows this. He then justifies this with a lot of jargon about reflecting the dog's negative energy back on himself to "put him in control and in balance". What obviously really happened is the dog learned that any attempt to defend himself would result in a terrifying near-fall. So the dog went FURTHER into prey-like behaviour and went full catatonic-fear mode where the animal plays dead.

Dogs only go into catatonic play-dead mode under the most extreme level of fear/duress. It is so rare that many people never see it in their life time, but it is the provenance of the phrase "scared stiff".

In order for a dog to hit catatonia their fear level has to be so high that they essentially shut down all brain function. You can look it up.

Instead of realizing that he has made this dog feel completely helpless and furthered the dog's trauma, Behan congratulates himself on helping the dog work through the trauma of being sedated (he thinks the fear catatonia is some kind of trauma memory of sedation) and helping the dog feel "balanced".

Was he really, Kevin? Or was he just under control? Because you know how it feels to be paralyzed by fear. You suffered it frequently in childhood. And now you have just done it to a dog, and decided it was meet and right to do so.

That dog is indeed your mirror.

If you happen to read this, Mr Behan, I strongly recommens you read some books on trauma and emotions, and work with a therapist to learn what you weren't taught in childhood - the spoken and physical language of emotion, the words to describe the subjective experiences of emotion and how to work through your own emotions.

So far you got through life suppressing your emotions and channeling them into dogs. Stop making them work through your traumas for you. Do it yourself.

And it'll make you an even better trainer and you'll find yourself better able to articulate your intuitive understanding of dog behavior. Because you're SO CLOSE.

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11 les gens ont trouvé cela utile

Energy crystals and feelings

Waste of a credit. A “progressive” word salad new age pile of dog excrement. Zero scientific data and analysis.

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Beyond interesting and delicious!

A road trip audio experience like no other, this book captured the whole family and kept everyone in a magical zone both educationally and satisfying.

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Improper use of scientific terms.

The idea is intriguing but his use of scientific terms, unscientifically, makes it impossible to for a science trained person to take seriously.

In addition, the examples he tried to use to establish a point, never reach the mark. Because he says it’s true you’re supposed to believe him

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