Épisodes

  • When Help Becomes Harm: How Overparenting Undermines Resilience
    Jan 22 2026

    Are we helping our kids, or holding them back? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch explore the growing concern of overparenting and what truly drives it beneath the surface. Responding to research outlining common signs of overparenting, Dr. Kathy explains how fear and a parent's need to look successful often lead us to correct too often and trust too little. Together, they unpack the difference between guidance and control, love and fear. Using the image of Peter stepping out of the boat, this conversation reframes parenting as staying close without stepping in too soon, allowing kids to struggle, learn, and grow while knowing help is available. For parents who feel exhausted or unsure where the line is, this episode offers reassurance and a clearer vision: raising capable, resilient kids by learning when to step back rather than step in.

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    11 min
  • Grandma Hobbies and Quiet Joy: Why Kids Need Slower Rhythms
    Jan 21 2026

    Why are teens and young adults suddenly drawn to reading, crocheting, sewing, walking, and other so-called "grandma hobbies"? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch explore why slower, quieter pastimes are resurfacing, and why they matter deeply for identity formation. Dr. Kathy explains how hobbies cultivate joy, perseverance, reflection, and self-awareness in a culture driven by speed, comparison, and constant stimulation. Together, they unpack the difference between fleeting happiness and lasting joy, why self-awareness is underdeveloped in today's noisy world, and how practices like crafting, reading, and walking help kids learn to be comfortable with their own thoughts. Grounded in Luke 2 and the ordinary rhythms of Jesus' early life, this conversation encourages parents to reintroduce quiet, purposeful activities, not as escape from life, but as a way for kids to inhabit it more fully.

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    14 min
  • Teaching the Tool: Helping Kids Build Wisdom Around Social Media
    Jan 20 2026

    Is social media always harmful for kids, or can we teach them to use it wisely? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch explore new research from Australia suggesting a "Goldilocks" window for social media use, where moderate engagement may support connection, but overuse or total avoidance can both undermine wellbeing. Together, they unpack why social media should be treated like any other powerful tool: taught, modeled, limited, and purposefully used. Dr. Kathy explains how parents can establish a healthy social media "diet," why real time relationships matter more than digital ones, and what kids lose when screens crowd out hobbies, service, and embodied belonging. Grounded in Acts 2 and identity formation, this conversation reframes social media not as a villain or a savior, but as something that must never bear the full weight of a child's belonging or identity.

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    13 min
  • Guiding Kids When The World Feels Unstable
    Jan 19 2026

    In this episode of Facing the Dark, Dr. Kathy Koch and Wayne Stender step carefully into a painful cultural moment following the death of Renee Nicole Good in Minnesota. Rather than debating politics, they explore how moments of public tragedy and unrest can quietly shape a child's identity, and a parent's emotional posture. This conversation unpacks how fear and uncertainty can begin to define who we think we are if we aren't grounded in something bigger. Dr. Kathy walks through the five key dimensions of identity, intellectual, emotional, social, physical, and spiritual, and explains how helping kids develop a big enough identity keeps cultural moments from swallowing them whole. The episode also offers practical guidance for parents who feel overwhelmed themselves: how to apologize when we overreact and how to teach children that sadness is a faithful response before anger. Grounded in the image of Jesus weeping with Mary and Martha, this episode reminds parents that sitting with grief is not weakness, it's formation.

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    19 min
  • Recess Matters: Why Kids Need Freedom On The Playground
    Jan 16 2026

    Have playgrounds become too safe for kids to actually grow? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Dr. Kathy Koch and Wayne Stender take a thoughtful look at the increasing restrictions on playgrounds and recess, and what those rules may be costing our children. From banning running and roughhousing to removing swings altogether, today's playgrounds often prioritize control over exploration. This conversation explores why unstructured play matters for confidence, problem solving, self regulation, and social development. Drawing on child development and Scripture, Dr. Kathy challenges parents and educators to reconsider whether constant supervision and rigid rules actually help kids, or quietly undermine courage and judgment. Grounded in Jesus' invitation to "let the little children come," this episode invites adults to trade whistle-blowing for watchful presence and to see recess not as chaos to manage, but as formation in motion.

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    12 min
  • Why Creativity Builds Character (And Why We Need It More Than Ever)
    Jan 15 2026

    Is creativity something to manage, or something to nurture? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Dr. Kathy Koch and Wayne Stender reframe creativity as far more than art projects or imaginative play. Drawing on research, classroom stories, and Scripture, they explore how creativity fuels resilience and character formation in children. From sticks turning into swords on a hike to invented words like fantabulous, this conversation shows how imagination helps kids problem solve, regulate stress, and engage the real world more deeply, not escape it. Rooted in Genesis 1, the episode reminds parents that creativity is part of what it means to bear God's image. Nature becomes the ultimate open ended classroom, inviting wonder, curiosity, and growth. If you've ever worried that creativity leads to chaos or distraction, this episode offers reassurance and practical wisdom for guiding, celebrating, and protecting your child's God-given creativity as it shapes both character and faith.

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    17 min
  • From Embarrassment To Bravery: Teaching Confidence Through Everyday Moments
    Jan 14 2026

    What if something as simple as ordering dinner could shape your child's confidence for life? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Dr. Kathy Koch and Wayne Stender explore how everyday moments, like letting kids speak up, make mistakes, and try again, become powerful training grounds for resilience. Using a creative family practice as a springboard, they unpack how courage grows through support, not pressure, and why failure isn't fatal, it's formative. Drawing on child development wisdom and the biblical story of Moses' struggle with speech, this conversation reassures parents that hesitation isn't weakness and that embarrassment doesn't disqualify a child from growth. If you want to help your kids develop confidence, communication skills, and resilience without crushing their spirit, this episode offers practical guidance and deep encouragement for walking alongside them as they learn to stand back up and try again.

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    11 min
  • Gender isn't The Real Issue: Caring For Kids Beneath The Confusion
    Jan 13 2026

    When children struggle with gender identity, it's rarely just about gender. In this episode of Facing the Dark, Dr. Kathy Koch and Wayne Stender respond to recent pauses in so-called gender-affirming care for minors and explore what real care for kids actually looks like. Drawing from counseling experience, research, Scripture, and deep compassion, they unpack why anxiety, depression, trauma, and confusion about the future often sit beneath gender distress, and why rushing to medical solutions can miss the deeper needs of the child. This conversation equips parents and loved ones with a posture rooted in compassion, hope, truth, and confidence, showing how to engage kids without rejection or oversimplification. If you love a child who is wrestling with identity questions and want to walk with them wisely and faithfully, this episode offers clarity and a path forward grounded in relationship rather than reaction.

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    17 min