The journey to understanding and integrating a later-in-life neurodivergent identity is often filled with relief, confusion, pride, growth, and other complex emotions—all woven together in a unique, personal arc.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the “neurodivergent identity arc”—a model that explores how people move from the state of not knowing they are neurodivergent to full integration into their identity. Drawing on Dr. Neff’s recent article, their own lived experiences, and patterns observed within neurodivergent communities, Patrick and Megan Anna unpack each stage’s challenges, risks, and transformative moments.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain a nuanced understanding of the four phases many neurodivergent adults cycle through—from pre-encounter to integration. Hear how these arcs differ based on privilege, intersectionality, and support needs.
2. Listen to deeply honest, relatable storytelling as both hosts openly share their own journeys with masking, diagnosis, community pride, and the tricky process of reconciling privilege with disability. Their vulnerability makes the conversation both illuminating and affirming.
3. Discover practical insights on moving through identity formation at your own pace—including common pitfalls and growth points—and why showing yourself compassion for “wherever you are” matters more than fitting into a perfect idea of thriving.

Whether you’re newly discovering your neurodivergent identity, feeling pride in community, or working toward greater self-acceptance, this episode offers an empathetic roadmap—and a reminder that your process is valid. Get insights about living, learning, and integrating neurodivergent identity in a complex world.

Check out Dr. Neff’s Article on Neurodivergent Identity Arcs: neurodivergentinsights.substack.com/p/neurodivergent-identity-arcs

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✨ Jane:

Jane is a practice management software and EMR that helps you balance caring for clients while growing your business. Co-founded by a...

Content Warning: This episode talks about suicide and may be triggering. If you're in crisis or feeling unsafe, please reach out to a crisis line or local resources. We have provided some below.

Suicidal ideation and risk are common among neurodivergent people, and talking openly about suicidality is hard, especially in a society where honesty about these thoughts is often met with fear, stigma, or misunderstanding. Navigating life with suicidal ideation can be an isolating experience, but knowing you're not alone and having resources and strategies at hand can make a life-saving difference.

In this episode, Dr. Megan Anna Neff and Patrick Casale, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss suicidality in neurodivergent communities. They share personal stories, break down the spectrum from passive ideation to crisis, discuss the shortcomings of traditional mental health support systems, and offer practical tools for safety planning, reducing risk, and finding hope.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain a clear, relatable understanding of the difference between chronic and acute suicidal ideation, including the nuanced ways this shows up for neurodivergent people.
2. Learn practical and accessible tools: how to create a personalized safety plan, what “means reduction” really involves, and how to identify red flags in yourself or loved ones, all explained with sensitivity and real-world insight.
3. Find validation and connection from hearing honest, stigma-free conversations about suicidality from mental health professionals who genuinely get it, and discover resources, grounding strategies, and hope for weathering difficult moments.

If you or someone you care about has ever felt overwhelmed by thoughts of not wanting to exist, this episode offers education, real talk, and actionable strategies. Listen for life-affirming insight and ways to help yourself or others stay safe, seen, and supported.

Resources

• Free Workbook by Neurodivergent Insights: neurodivergentinsights.com/free/the-neurodivergent-adapted-safety-plan
• For a list of US and International Crises Lines (including non-carceral lines): neurodivergentinsights.com/neurodivergent-crises-support
• National Mental Health Hotline: 988lifeline.org
• International Association for Suicide Prevention: iasp.info/suicidalthoughts
• Crisis Call Center: hopeline-nc.org
• SeekHealing (North Carolina, USA): seekhealing.org

International

• U.K.: Samaritans 116 123
• Canada: 988 or Talk Suicide Canada (1-833-456-4566)
• Australia: Lifeline 13 11 14

*Non-Carceral Lines

Some crisis lines can lead to law enforcement involvement, which can put BIPOC and Trans people at risk. Here are non-carceral lines for BIPOC and Trans communities:

• Trans Lifeline Hotline: Call U.S. (877) 565-8860 or Canada (877) 330-6366
• BlackLine: Call 1 (800) 604-5841 or visit

The phrase "everyone’s a little bit ADHD" is coming up more and more lately—but for those who are genuinely ADHD, this can feel dismissive and invalidating. In a world speeding up with constant distractions and increasing demands, society has begun to blur the lines with what the actual difference is between experiencing ADHD traits and living with ADHD as a neurodevelopmental condition.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the nuance behind “everyone's a little bit ADHD.” They unpack the social myths around distraction, impulsivity, and executive functioning in today’s society, share their own stories of late ADHD diagnosis, and reflect on the dangers of minimizing real challenges faced by ADHDers. With candid conversation, they differentiate between ADHD traits and diagnosis, explore the impact of undiagnosed ADHD, and discuss why oversimplification can be harmful.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Learn the difference between ADHD traits that many may experience in a fast-paced world—and the lived disability of ADHD that involves real, sometimes dangerous, daily challenges.
2. Hear personal stories from Patrick and Dr. Neff about late-in-life discovery, navigating shame and grief, and unpacking impulsivity, masking, and complicated relationships.
3. Understand why phrases like “everyone’s a little bit ADHD” can be minimizing, and discover the real-world impact of misdiagnosis, missed support, and the need for greater societal awareness.

If you’re curious about ADHD traits in non-ADHDers, or you want to better understand the real experiences of ADHDers, this episode offers insight into the “ADHD for everyone” myth.

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✨ Jane:

Jane is a practice management software and EMR that helps you balance caring for clients while growing your business. Co-founded by a multidisciplinary clinic owner and a developer with an eye for design, it’s built to fit the way that you work, supporting your practice as it grows and evolves.

Jane helps with day-to-day admin, like scheduling, documentation, and billing, so you can stay focused on the care you give. Jane was built with clients in mind, too. With...

Hearing "everyone is a little bit Autistic" can feel invalidating and diminish the distinct experiences of Autistic individuals. These comments, often rooted in misunderstanding or attempted empathy, reveal how language shapes—and sometimes distorts—public understanding of Autism.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the common phrase and idea that “everyone is a little bit Autistic.” They explore why this phrase is so prevalent, the intentions and real impacts behind such statements, and the crucial differences between having “Autistic traits” and living with the full Autistic experience. You’ll hear honest stories about disclosure, invalidation, and what “context sensitivity” really means in identifying Autism—and why language matters when advocating for neurodivergent needs.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain a deeper understanding of why the phrase “everyone is a little bit Autistic” can be harmful, and get clear language for differentiating between having Autistic traits and being Autistic.
2. Hear personal reflections from Patrick and Megan Anna on invalidation, masking, disclosure in professional and personal life, and what it’s like to receive common microaggressions—even from therapists and family members.
3. Explore what truly defines the Autistic experience, including insightful discussion of “context sensitivity” as a key factor in proper identification, and how this impacts access to support, accommodations, and authentic self-acceptance.

This conversation helps to unpack the phrase “everyone is a little Autistic,” and explores the difference between possessing “Autistic traits” and living with the unique neurological, sensory, and social realities of Autism.

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✨ Jane:

Jane is a practice management software and EMR that helps you balance caring for clients while growing your business. Co-founded by a multidisciplinary clinic owner and a developer with an eye for design, it’s built to fit the way that you work, supporting your practice as it grows and evolves.

Jane helps with day-to-day admin, like scheduling, documentation, and billing, so you can stay focused on the care...

Struggling with being labeled "lazy" or "unmotivated" as someone with ADHD can fuel deep shame and misunderstanding. These stereotypes overlook the real challenges and complexities neurodivergent people face every day, especially when it comes to executive functioning and self-worth.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the pervasive myth that ADHD is simply about lack of motivation or laziness. Through candid discussion, they explore the realities of inconsistent motivation, the role of shame and internalized ableism, the overlap and differences between ADHD and Autism, and their own personal experiences managing daily life, self-care, and executive functioning struggles.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain real insight into why ADHDers often internalize harmful labels and what’s actually happening neurologically and emotionally beneath the surface of "laziness" or "lack of motivation."
2. Hear honest stories from Patrick and Megan Anna about managing shame, tackling everyday executive functioning challenges, and embracing self-compassion as a neurodivergent adult.
3. Explore how living with both ADHD and Autism can shape self-understanding, coping strategies, and the ongoing negotiation between passion, energy, and daily life demands.

If you’ve ever wrestled with shame or frustration over "simple" tasks, or if you want to better understand the ADHD experience beyond stereotypes, this episode will help you rethink what motivation really looks like and why you’re not alone.

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✨ Jane:

Jane is a practice management software and EMR that helps you balance caring for clients while growing your business. Co-founded by a multidisciplinary clinic owner and a developer with an eye for design, it’s built to fit the way that you work, supporting your practice as it grows and evolves.

Jane helps with day-to-day admin, like scheduling, documentation, and billing, so you can stay focused on the care you give. Jane was built with clients in mind, too. With online booking and secure online appointments (telehealth), your care stays accessible and easy to keep up with.

To learn more about...

Challenging the stigma that ADHD and Autism are linked to intelligence is critical for fostering self-acceptance and equity in neurodivergent communities. Myths about intellectual ability not only misunderstand neurodiversity but also perpetuate harmful stereotypes and barriers to support.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the pervasive myths about intelligence and neurodivergence—including the misconception that you “can’t be smart and have ADHD,” or that all Autistic people are either intellectually disabled or savants. Through candid discussion and personal stories, they unpack the nuanced reality that ADHD and Autism span the entire intellectual spectrum, delve into how executive functioning struggles are misinterpreted as lack of intelligence or ability, and explore the intersectional impacts of racial bias and systemic injustice for neurodivergent children in schools and society.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Dispel damaging myths about intelligence, success, and neurodivergence by hearing frank conversations about how stereotypes harm both diagnosis and self-esteem for ADHDers and Autistic people.
2. Gain a deeper understanding of intersectionality—learn how race, environment, and access to support shape outcomes for neurodivergent individuals, especially in educational and legal systems.
3. Find validation and practical encouragement: whether you’ve struggled with shame, self-doubt, or dropped out of jobs or school, this episode reminds you that your intelligence and potential are not defined by neurotypical success metrics.

This episode invites you to challenge stereotypes about intelligence in relation to ADHD and Autism and embrace the full spectrum of neurodivergent experience.

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✨ Jane:

Jane is a practice management software and EMR that helps you balance caring for clients while growing your business. Co-founded by a multidisciplinary clinic owner and a developer with an eye for design, it’s built to fit the way that you work, supporting your practice as it grows and evolves.

Jane helps with day-to-day admin, like scheduling, documentation, and billing, so you can stay focused on the care you give. Jane was built with clients in mind, too. With online booking and secure online appointments...

The language we use to describe Autistic experiences can shape not only how we see ourselves, but how our needs are understood—or overlooked—by others.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the topic of functioning labels in Autistic spaces. Through direct exploration of their own journeys, they unpack the reasons behind the prevalence of labels like “high” or “low” functioning, discuss the roots in societal values around productivity and worth, and offer thoughtful alternatives such as support-needs-based language. They also reflect on the challenges of unlearning internalized ableism, fostering compassion for different arcs of discovery, and addressing community tensions in regards to Autistic people with varying support needs.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain clarity on why functioning labels are widely criticized and how they fail to capture the lived realities of Autistic people—especially when support needs, communication, and daily functioning can vary and intersect in complex ways.
2. Hear candid discussion about the emotional impact of language—how shame, internalized ableism, and gatekeeping in neurodivergent spaces can affect community, self-advocacy, and the willingness to seek help.
3. Discover practical, affirming alternatives to functioning labels and why evolving our language helps build more inclusive, supportive, and respectful Autistic and neurodivergent communities.

If you’ve ever wondered about the impact of functioning labels or struggled with finding the “right” language to describe your or your loved ones’ experiences, this episode will challenge, encourage, and inform you about language, identity, and what it means to create more supportive Autistic spaces.

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✨ Jane:

Jane is a practice management software and EMR that helps you balance caring for clients while growing your business. Co-founded by a multidisciplinary clinic owner and a developer with an eye for design, it’s built to fit the way that you work, supporting your practice as it grows and evolves.

Jane helps with day-to-day admin, like scheduling, documentation, and billing, so you can stay focused on the care you give. Jane was built with clients in mind, too. With online booking and secure online appointments (telehealth),

Autistic people are often stereotyped as uninterested in social connection, but the reality is far more nuanced, and longing for connection can coexist with the need for isolation or sensory protection. Understanding your own capacity and motivation for relationships isn’t just helpful, it’s often a key part of self-acceptance.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the misconception that Autistic people don’t want connection. They talk about the nuances of social motivation, energy, and capacity; share candid stories about their own friendship, relational differences, and how the neurodivergent community feels different than neurotypical interaction; and offer insight into parallel play, the importance of rhythmic attunement, and what actually makes friendship feel sustainable and authentic.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Challenge myths and stereotypes about Autistic social motivation and capacity — this conversation provides context, nuance, and real-life examples from Patrick and Megan Anna’s own experiences.
2. Discover what makes neurodivergent connections uniquely rewarding (and sometimes difficult), including honest reflections on friendship maintenance, the metaphor of “cactus” versus “Venus flytrap” personalities, and the power of finding your rhythm with others.
3. Learn ways to build and sustain relationships that honor your needs, including adaptive strategies for digital, parallel, and deep connections—and why unmasking and attunement matter in making friendship work.

If you’ve ever wrestled with wanting connection but feeling like social energy is limited—or if you’re searching for friendships that honor your neurodivergent rhythms—this episode is full of empathy, insight, and practical ideas. Deepen your understanding of what authentic connection looks like and how to find it in your own life.

Additional Learning

To explore more about relationships, cross-neurotype dynamics, and navigating communication differences, check out these Neurodivergent Insights articles:

• The Double Empathy Problem: neurodivergentinsights.com/the-double-empathy-problem
• Cross-Neurotype Communication: neurodivergentinsights.com/object-based-vs-social-based-conversations
• Object-Based vs. Social-Based Conversations: neurodivergentinsights.com/object-based-vs-social-based-conversations

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