Gaslighting is often framed as a one-way act or behavior—someone manipulates, and the other is manipulated. But in reality, gaslighting is a relational dynamic. Its "success" hinges not only on the manipulator’s actions but also on the recipient's openness to self-doubt and questioning their own perceptions.

Certain traits make people more vulnerable to gaslighting. These qualities often lead the person to trust the gaslighter's version of reality over their own. Gaslighters often choose partners who value harmony and trust over conflict, knowing their partner might be more willing to question themselves rather than the person they love.

The term gaslighting has been around for decades. But it’s only been used in the psychological sense since 2007, and it was coined by today’s guest.

Dr. Robin Stern, the author of The Gaslight Effect and co-founder of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, has spent years studying this insidious phenomenon. She explores how it manifests in relationships and, more importantly, how we can break free from its grip.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why gaslighting is one of the most powerful tools of control.
• The surprising positive traits that make people more susceptible to gaslighting.
• How to spot the early, subtle signs of gaslighting.

AND… the most common ways people misuse the term—and why it matters.

Xxoo Darcy

REFERENCES

Mindful Care

The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life

CREDITS

“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani and Preston Smith.

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