This episode of Neuroshambles, will resonate will all parents of neurodifferent kids, as Mark discusses difficulties with transition with the wonderful autism advocate, Pete Wharmby. Together, they delve into the messy, stressful, and often misunderstood world of transitions – from seemingly small everyday routines to major life changes.

Whether it’s leaving the house, going into school, or prying them away from screen time, transitions can often be a sensory, emotional and logistical nightmare for autistic, ADHD and PDA kids (and adults). But why exactly are they so hard – and what can we do to ease the load?

This is a funny, heartfelt, and cathartic episode full of insight, compassion and practical suggestions, as well as a much-needed sense of solidarity for anyone who’s ever dreaded their kids being invited to a birthday party.

—

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):

00:00 – Intro and why this is only part one

03:30 – Meet the guest: Pete Wharmby

12:00 – Transitions: What they are and why they’re so difficult

19:00 – Fear of the unknown

25:00 – Why birthday parties can be so anxiety-inducing

32:00 – Strategies for smoother transitions to the unknown

40:00 – School and powerlessness

48:00 – Holidays, Google Earth and visual planning

55:00 – Fear of the Known: Why school can feel like a punishment

1:03:00 – Processing struggles and instruction overload

1:13:00 – Fixable triggers and simple (free) accommodations

1:20:00 – The double-edged sword of hyperfocus

1:24:00 – Neurodiversity Champion: Fight For Ordinary

1:26:30 – Tiny Epic Wins

1:29:00 – What the Flip? Moments

1:33:00 – Wrap-up and tease for part 2

—

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION:

Pete Wharmby website - https://petewharmby.com/

Untypical by Pete Wharmby - https://amzn.eu/d/8gGK6v4

What I Want to Talk About, by Pete Wharmby - https://amzn.eu/d/6tY0kZQ

Fight for Ordinary - https://disabledchildrenspartnership.org.uk/fight-for-ordinary/

Google Maps Street View - https://www.google.com/streetview/

Google Earth - https://earth.google.com/web/

Ordnance Survey Maps - https://shop.ordnancesurvey.co.uk/

Albion In The Community - https://bhafcfoundation.org.uk/

Monotropism and Autism Theory - https://monotropism.org/

Interoception - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/professional-practice/interoception-wellbeing

—

CONTACT US

🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com

📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles

🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod

📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles

🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

—

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

In this episode of Neuroshambles, Mark Allen is joined by devoted dad and fellow Neuroshambler Mark Holborow, for a refreshingly honest look at the difficulties of holding down a job, while raising neurodivergent kids and trying (often unsuccessfully) to keep those two worlds from colliding.

They discuss naked Zoom call interruptions and the emotional labour of school drop-offs, as well as the guilt, the resilience, and the accidental skillsets parents of ND kids develop.

It’s a cathartic, relatable deep dive into the realities of navigating employment when your home life is anything but typical – with plenty of laughs, rants, and candid talk about autism, ADHD, PDA and neurodivergent parenting.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):

00:00 – Intro & Listener Survey Feedback 05:30 – Meet the Guest: Mark Holborough 10:00 – The Challenges of working parents 16:30 – Working from Home with neurodifferent Kids 25:00 – Background chaos, interruptions and client calls 33:00 – The emotional guilt of being the breadwinner 40:00 – Supporting the non-working Parent 53:00 – How open can you be at work? 1:00:00 – Hiding a child at work: Real life stories 1:07:00 – Why parents of neuro-exceptional kids make great employees 1:13:00 – The economic cost of caring 1:26:00 – The Positives 1:29:00 – Neurodiversity Champions 1:33:00 – Tiny Epic Wins 1:37:00 – What the Flip? Moments 1:41:00 – Wrap-up and thanks

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• Neuroshambles Listener Survey: https://forms.gle/2wFVupe4HumCYym6A
• LSE Report – The Economic Case for Prioritising Autism in Policy and Reform: http://lse.ac.uk/cpec/assets/documents/Autismeconomics.pdf
• The Sunflower Alliance – raising awareness of hidden disabilities: https://hdsunflower.com/
• BUPA Medical Insurance: https://www.bupa.co.uk/health/health-insurance-ppc-b

⸻

CONTACT US

🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com 📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com 📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles 🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod 📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles 🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

To kick off Season 3, Mark welcomes back Neuroshambles favourite Heidi Mavir - bestselling author, speaker, fearless advocate and proud neurodivergent parent - for a lively and cathartic deep dive into swearing. From F-bombs on the trampoline to grandparent-safe alternatives, they explore how language, context, and neurodivergent wiring all shape how (and why) our kids swear.

This warm and witty episode unpacks the relationship between swearing and regulation, impulse control, PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance), sensory overload, and social context. Expect plenty of laughs, the occasional C-bomb, and a ton of relatable chaos for anyone raising autistic, ADHD, or otherwise differently-wired kids.

Whether you’re a proudly sweary household or struggling to police your neurodivergent child's potty-mouth moments, this episode is packed with nuance, honesty, and a surprising amount of empathy - even for those who hate bad language.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):

00:00 - Welcome Back & Meet the Guest: Heidi Mavir 03:00 - School Turbulence, Burnout & Finding Your Flow 08:00 - Why Swearing Is This Week’s Topic 12:00 - What Is a Swear Word Anyway? 18:00 - Swearing, Context & Cultural Taboos 25:00 - Family Rules: “Nana Swears” vs “F-Bombs at Home” 33:00 - Parenting Through Swearing: Where Do You Draw the Line? 41:00 - PDA, Equalising Behaviour & Rage Rooms 50:00 - When the Swears Are Aimed at You 58:00 - Swearing as a Self-Regulation Strategy 1:03:00 - Should We Be Policing Swearing at All? 1:12:00 - Swearing and Impulse Control in ADHD 1:17:00 - Teaching Context Without Policing Expression 1:25:00 - Workarounds, Wordplay & Sweary Shenanigans 1:30:00 – Tiny Epic Wins 1:35:00 – What the Flip? Moments 1:40:00 - Wrap-Up & Where to Find Heidi

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• Heidi Mavir website - https://www.heidimavir.com/
• Heidi’s “Your child is not broken” book - https://amzn.eu/d/cjoih9W
• Eliza Fricker “Can’t not won’t” book - https://amzn.eu/d/91m7voc
• PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) - https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/what-is-pda/
• “F*ck you I won’t do what you tell me”, song lyric by Rage Against The Machine - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWXazVhlyxQ

• Lindsay McGlone - https://www.instagram.com/rollinwithlindsay_/

• Reclaimed Means Business - https://lindsaymcglone.kartra.com/page/RMB2025

⸻

CONTACT US

🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com 📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com 📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles 🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod 📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles 🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

In this season finale, Mark welcomes back the brilliant Lisa Galley (@school_run_mum_autism), who is an autism family consultant, ex-speech and language therapist, and mum of three grown-up autistic humans.

Together, they discuss how the summer holidays are a very different experience for parents of neurodifferent kids and why the concept of a “relaxing summer” is more often myth than reality.

Touching on the common parental feelings of boredom, guilt and the ever-present FOMO, this is a candid, humorous and occasionally insightful look at what we're going to be experiencing over the summer when it seems like we're house-bound with our autistic, ADHD and PDA kids.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):

00:00 - Intro & Meet the Guest: Lisa Galley 04:00 - Introducing the topic of the week 06:30 - The burden of boredom 10:00 - Dealing with guilt of not providing the "perfect" summer 17:00 - The loss of spontaneity and the rampant FOMO 26:30 - The unspoken impact on working parents 30:00 - Attempting to go on holiday 34:00 - The importance of summer holidays for our kids 38:00 - Q&A: Answering listeners' summer holiday questions 41:00 - Testing out home education in the summer 45:00 - How to help yourself as a parent 47:30 - The challenges of co-parenting in the summer holidays 58:00 - Advice from listeners 1:03:00 - The positives of the summer holidays 1:05:00 - Neurodiversity Champions 1:08:30 - Tiny Epic Wins 1:11:30 - "What the Flip?" moments 1:16:30 - Outro and Season Wrap-Up

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• Lisa Galley Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/school_run_mum_autism/
• Parent Carer Cheerleeding Squad Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/parentcarercheerleadingsquad
• Special Assistance at airports - https://www.caa.co.uk/passengers-and-public/special-assistance/accessing-special-assistance/
• We're Not Your Typical Podcast - https://were-not-your-typical-podcast-258bbca3.simplecast.com/
• Let’s Talk Neurodivergent Kids Podcast - https://pod.link/1442067009
• Legoland Windsor Accessibility Pass - https://www.legoland.co.uk/plan-your-day/before-you-visit/accessibility/
• "Holidays" episode of Neuroshambles - https://pod.link/1710455546/episode/2b5dc7973b418c9d6069ced370c409b9
• "Hobbies" episode of Neuroshambles - https://pod.link/1710455546/episode/19a31193017cd7413d681ff3b36119eb
• Lisa Galley's Summer Survival Guide - https://lisagalley.myflodesk.com/survival

⸻

CONTACT US

🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com 📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com 📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles 🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod 📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles 🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

In this episode of Neuroshambles, Mark is joined by returning guest Hatty Ashdown - not only a parent of a neurodivergent child, but also a brilliant comedian, writer and host of the Funny Mummies podcast. Together they dive into the deceptively simple but totally chaotic world of swimming.

For children with autism, ADHD, PDA, and other forms of neurodivergency, swimming can be simultaneously a magical sensory experience and an absolute logistical nightmare. From the infuriating act of trying to get them to swim in the first place, to negotiating the changing room routine, navigating the lockers and dealing with their antics in the pool, Mark and Hatty share candid and hilarious tales of what it’s like to take your neuro-exceptional brood swimming - and why we keep doing it, despite the enormous faff.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):

00:00 - Intro & Meet the Guest: Hatty Ashdown 06:00 - Topic of the Week: Swimming 09:00 - Why do neurodivergent kids love swimming? 15:00 - The challenge of teaching neurodivergent kids to swim 30:30 - The massive faff of a swimming trip: Hatty's routine 37:00 - The massive faff of a swimming trip: Mark's routine 42:00 - The chaos of changing rooms 46:30 - The stress of the lockers 53:00 - Shenanigans in the pool 59:30 - Losing their goggles 1:04:00 - The Positives: the joy of swimming 1:08:00 - Neurodiversity champions 1:12:00 - Tiny epic wins 1:15:00 - What the Flip? Moments 1:20:00 - Wrap-Up and Where to Find Hatty

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• Hatty Ashdown’s Website – https://hattyashdown.com/

• Funny Mummies Podcast: Basics – https://pod.link/1451332466

• Funny Mummies Podcast: VIP (Patreon) – https://www.patreon.com/FunnyMummiesPodcast

• Bella Ramsey (Neurodiversity Champion) – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bella_Ramsey

⸻

CONTACT US

🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com

📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles

🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod

📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles

🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

Following on from part 1, fan favourite Jo Matthews joins Mark once more for another laughter-filled, cathartic rant through the most mind-bogglingly ill-informed things people have said about raising autistic, ADHD, PDA and otherwise neurodivergent kids.

This one features a fresh batch of well-meaning nonsense, unsolicited advice, and flat-out offensive comments submitted by Neuroshambles listeners. It’s funny, familiar, and frighteningly relatable.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):

00:00 - Intro & Meet the Guest: Jo Matthews Returns

05:30 - "Have you tried a routine?"

10:30 - "Have you tried a parenting course?"

13:30 - “Have you tried changing their diet?”

17:00 - "Why don't you take their screens away?"

20:00 - "Does he have mild autism?"

25:30 - Good autism v bad autism

29:00 - “We’re all a bit autistic"

34:30 - "ADHD is just an excuse"

37:00 - “It doesn't define him”

41:00 - "There's nothing wrong with him"

43:00 - Medical v Social models of disability

47:30 - "My kid does that"

50:00 - “He'll eat when he's hungry"

52:30 - “He'll grow out of it"

54:30 - “He doesn't look autistic"

56:30 - “But, he can talk, so he can’t be autistic”

59:00 - “ADHD is just for boys”

1:01:30 - "What's wrong with him?"

1:02:30 - "I bet he's good at maths"

1:04:30 - "I don't know how you do it"

1:07:00 - Misguided empathy: "I know how you feel"

1:09:00 - "But I do that and I'm not autistic"

1:14:00 - The completely batshit mental comments

1:20:00 - Neurodiversity Champions

1:21:30 - Tiny Epic Wins

1:25:00 - "What the flip?" moments

1:27:30 - Wrap-up & contact info

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• The medical vs social models of disability: www.scope.org.uk/about-us/social-model-of-disability/

• Autism assessments (AQ Test): www.embrace-autism.com/aq-10/#test

• Bowles Outdoor Centre - www.bowles.rocks

⸻

CONTACT US

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com

📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles

🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod

📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles

🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

In this episode, Mark is joined once again by the brilliant Jo Matthews for a cathartic, hilarious, and occasionally sweary dive into the unfiltered reality of parenting autistic, ADHD and PDA kids.

From "It's just a label" and "He’s fine with me" to "You just need to push them out of their comfort zone", this is part one of a two-part special on the unsolicited commentary we all get, whether it’s from strangers, family members, or well-meaning-but-utterly-wrong professionals. The kind of comments that pretend to be supportive but are really just dismissive, ignorant, or unhelpfully optimistic.

Together, Mark and Jo share personal stories, listener submissions, and a few moments of pure rage-laughter, as they unpack why these statements cut so deep – and how to push back with humour, honesty, and the occasional incredulous raise of the eyebrow.

⸻

CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated): 00:00 – Intro & Meet the Guest: Jo Matthews 06:00 – “It's just a label” 08:00 - The story of Rube Waddell 16:00 - "Stop Mollycoddling your child" 21:00 - "You let them win too much" 22:30 - "Can't you just make them do it?" 26:00 - "You should make their home life more unpleasant" 28:00 - "Your parenting is wishy washy" 31:00 - "Children just need boundaries" 36:00 - "You need to push them out of their comfort zone" 43:00 - "Are you too afraid to say no?" 48:00 - "How will they manage in the real world?" 52:00 - "Sometimes, it's a choice" 54:00 - "They're just trying to get their own way" 01:02:00 - "They're fine when they're with me" 01:07:00 - The Positives 01:09:30 - Neurodiversity Champions 01:12:00 - Tiny Epic Wins 01:14:30 - What the Flip? 01:17:00 - Wrap-Up & What’s Coming in Part Two

⸻

LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:

• Rube Waddell - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rube_Waddell
• "Am I raising an arsehole?" episode of Neuroshambles -https://pod.link/1710455546/episode/a313c1057becbcd2e24d64c5bf94820e
• "The Explosive Child" book - https://drrossgreene.com/the-explosive-child.htm

⸻

CONTACT US

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com 📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles 🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod 📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles 🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

⸻

CREDITS

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

In this episode, Mark takes a typically sideways look at the idea of hobbies – those wholesome after-school activities that see neurotypical kids flourish… but which, for many neurodivergent families, are either a logistical nightmare, a sensory minefield, or a fast track to public meltdown.

Joining him is the brilliant Nicole Bateman – podcast host (Conversations with a SEND Mum), former teacher, trainer, and founder of The Friendly SEND Advisor and Super Sensory Squad. Together, they explore the myths, pressures and downright ridiculousness of what “having hobbies” means when your kids are autistic, ADHD or PDA.

They cover what actually works, what definitely doesn’t, and the benefits of learning to follow your neurodifferent child's lead, so you can meet them where they're at, rather than where you want them to be.

00:00 – Intro & Meet the Guest: Nicole Bateman 03:00 – The fantasy of hobbies vs the reality 08:00 – Issues with trust and accessibility 13:00 – After-school clubs 18:00 – The Summer holiday hobby void 25:00 – Trying to force your neurodivergent children to have a hobby 33:00 – Social disconnect in group settings 39:00 – When your best intentions fail 44:00 - Environmental barriers to adopting a hobby 47:00 – Competitive Sport: Gift or Curse? 53:00 – Caesar-or-Nothing syndrome & hobby avoidance 59:00 – Drop-off disasters 1:07:00 – What *does* work? 1:12:00 – It's not all rubbish: A look at the positives 1:15:00 – Neurodiversity Champions 1:23:00 – Tiny Epic Wins 1:26:00 – What the Flip? Moments 1:29:00 – Wrap-Up & Where to Find Nicole

• Nicole Bateman’s Website – Friendly SEND Advisor and Super Sensory Squad: https://nicolebateman.co.uk/
• Conversations with a SEND Mum – Nicole’s podcast: https://conversationswithasendmum.buzzsprout.com/
• Super Sensory Squad Book – ‘Buzz’s Birthday’ and other penguin-based sensory tools: https://www.thesupersensorysquad.com/
• Cub Scouts: https://www.scouts.org.uk/cubs/being-a-cub/joining-cubs/
• Lisa Lloyd reel - Neurotypicals watching what their parents watch: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DIzCFBxNzxT
• “Why Can’t I Just Enjoy Things?” by Pierre Novellie – Caesar-or-nothing brains and comedy insight: https://amzn.eu/d/dSZA4dC
• Minecraft Club - Online Social Group for 7-14 year olds: https://minecraftclub.co.uk/
• Press Play - Stop frame animation workshops in Sussex: https://pressplayfilms.co.uk/
• Boogie Beat - Music and movement classes: https://boogiebeat.co.uk/
• Sam Mills – Disability Tennis Brighton: Email smsportsolutions@gmail.com for information

📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com

📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles

🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod

📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles

🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles

🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com