My guest today is a dear friend, a sister, poet, mystic and writer Ruth L. Schwartz. She is the author of eight books and founding director of the Conscious Girlfriend Academy, a worldwide organization for lesbians and queer women dedicated to preventing heartbreak, dating wisely and loving well. The Academy provides education and support on conscious lesbian dating, relationships and sexuality, and helps self-identified women learn to be the right partner as well as to find her, so they can have happy, healthy love and fulfilling sex.

In this episode, we talk about two different paradigms of healing relational trauma and relational wounds. We discuss our primal need for connection and being in relationships with others, self and life. Through this sincere conversation, Ruth helps us understand the concept of conscious solitude, the Internal Family System model, and what it means to befriend the power of our heart, our energy field and our relationship needs.

Episode Chapters:

(00:00) - Introduction to Ruth L. Schwartz

(02:58) - Two paradigms of healing relational trauma

(08:22) - Overcoming the binary view of relationship gains and losses

(12:44) - The role of relationships and solitude in healing

(16:25) - Relationship dynamics with others, self, and life

(21:55) - Discussing the Internal Family System model

(24:00) - The theory of Parts in IFS

(31:57) - Healing through the relationship with self

(38:53) - Conscious solitude framework

(43:16) - Coherence and the energetics of the heart

(54:22) - Befriending our nervous system

(57:24) - About Conscious Girlfriend Academy

Resources:

- Learn how to prevent heartbreak, date wisely and love well at http://www.consciousgirlfriendacademy.com

- Check out our book: Conscious Lesbian Dating & Love: A Guide to Finding the Right Partner & Creating the Relationship of Your Dreams https://www.consciousgirlfriendacademy.com/book

- Connect with Ruth L. Schwartz on IG - https://www.instagram.com/consciousgirlfriendacademy/

- Find Ruth on FB - www.facebook.com/groups/consciousgirlfriend

- HearthMath Institute https://www.heartmath.org/

- Robert Falconer - IFS Consultant https://robertfalconer.us/

Anne-Marie Marron

• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here
• For more on customized immersions with Anne-Marie, please visit: https://anne-mariemarron.com/integral-leadership-immersion

At this time of the year, many of us are experiencing a strong, primal need to belong to someone or to something in this world. However, many of us are also experiencing the feelings of isolation, loneliness and being exiled from that same world. So today, I’m compelled to share some thoughts about belonging and isolation, because these topics have been headliners in many of my client conversations over the past months.

I’m going to talk about the two types of belonging, the different ways and moments in which we can experience belonging, why our relationships with pets can be such a vital source of the sense of belonging, as well as how to teach our nervous system not to fear solitude, but embrace it as a conscious experience that leads to shifting the quantum field we’re part of.

Tune in so we can reflect together on what it means to us to belong beyond fear and addictive chemical drivers, and to find a sweet spot of belonging inside and in the world.

Episode Chapters:

(00:00) - Why talking about belonging also means talking about feeling exiled

(03:54) - How animals can teach us about deep belonging and unconditional love

(08:36) - Fear-based vs. authentic belonging

(12:57) - The difficult path of learning to belong from the depth of our soul

(18:18) - Is belonging a stable and unshakable state? Or is it more of a moment-to-moment experience?

(21:11) - How seeking external validation can lead to feeling alienated and exiled

(23:38) - What it means to belong to our most raw and primal self

(26:32) - Commentary on Dr. Joe Dispenza’s talk about the power of conscious solitude

(30:46) - The ripple effect of our presence and consciousness on the quantum field

(34:03) - What it means to become energetically self-sufficient

(39:18) - Questions to reflect on about belonging and cultivating an inner refuge

(41:41) - Future offerings and closing poem by John O’Donohue

Resources:

- Dr. Joe Dispenza: Why Living Alone is Better for Your Soul than Any Relationship https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfAw3NXksZE&t=157s

- Poetry: Wild Geese, by Mary Oliver, http://famouspoetsandpoems.com/poets/mary_oliver/poems/15809#google_vignette

- Poetry: Belonging, by John O’Donohue, https://www.johnodonohue.com/

Anne-Marie Marron

• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here
• For more on customized immersions with Anne-Marie, please visit: https://anne-mariemarron.com/integral-leadership-immersion

Welcome back to The Power of Reclamation Podcast!

It’s been two and a half years since I found myself slung deep into another dark night of the soul, which I am gingerly resurrecting from. During this episode, I’ll be sharing some of the highlights, heartbreaks, and victories of this alchemical and harrowing passage.

Two key themes to highlight today is how our heart intelligence has the power to heal trauma and shame. And, the second is our capacity to uplevel our nervous system’s capacity to hold complex paradoxes, loss, destruction and heartbreak with more inner stability and confidence.

Episode chapters:

(02:02) - The core lesson of my dark night of the soul journey
(04:05) - Why our nervous system seemingly backfires on us
(09:45) - How to recognize fawning as a trauma response mechanism
(17:25) - How heartbreak, pain, and grief catalyzed my personal growth
(24:31) - What is a nourishment barrier? And how does it impact our ability to receive goodness?
(32:38) - A key pivot point in my healing journey that my mentor catalyzed in me
(44:23) - The power of our breath's ability to shift our emotional and nervous system states
(51:43) - How understanding our attachment styles can be helpful in any relationship
(59:44) - The cost of reinforcing a chronically over-activated nervous system (personally and collectively)
(01:01:52) - What is a "dark night of the soul" and how do we resurrect from one?
(01:08:18) - The experience of midwifing my mom through her death
(01:16:53) – A refresher of the Six Power Reclamation Gateways

My Mentor: Shawna Reininger, The Conscious Enterprise, https://theconsciousenterprise.com/shawna-reininger-psychic-intuitive-and-coach/

Anne-Marie Marron

• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
  • Power reclamation guide and somatic healing: www.anne-mariemarron.com
  • Leadership coach and organizational-culture consultant: www.revealingwisdom.com
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here
• For more on customized immersions with Anne-Marie, please visit: https://anne-mariemarron.com/integral-leadership-immersion

Nicola Amadora:  Dr. Nicola Amadora is an international spiritual teacher, psychologist and trauma/Hakomi therapist, speaker, activist and author. For three decades she has worked with thousands of people worldwide. Nicola guides spiritual retreats, sessions and professional trainings. She is passionate about the great turning for our lives and this world. 

• Nicola's Website: www.nicolaamadora.com

Anne-Marie Marron

• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
  • Power reclamation guide and somatic healing: www.anne-mariemarron.com
  • Leadership coach and organizational-culture consultant: www.revealingwisdom.com
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here

Today, I want to focus on the paradigm of superhuman compulsion. This socially esteemed and normalized way of operating that often requires us to neglect our need for rest, sleep, connection, play and self-care in order to sustain our self-image of being competent, valuable, and responsible.

These pressures whisk us away on a roller-coaster ride of highs and lows — one day we feel accomplished, successful, and worthy, and a day later, we collapse into depression, unworthiness and feelings of self-doubt and failure. 

Episode Notes:

Anne-Marie Marron

• Article: The Superhuman Compulsion by Anne-Marie Marron, click here. 
• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
  • Power reclamation guide and somatic healing: www.anne-mariemarron.com
  • Leadership coach and organizational-culture consultant: www.revealingwisdom.com
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here

It sounds easy to say, "welcome everything", but if you've tried, you'll know how many protectors and iron gates come down when circumstances that we don't like capture our attention or threaten our sense of power, safety and connection.

It takes immense courage and consciousness to embark on this deep level of integration and healing.   There is great power gained by learning to welcome our shadows and messiness.   

Resources from the episode:

1. The Leadership Circle: 

• https://leadershipcircle.com/en/
• The Leadership Circle (TLC) 360 Leadership Profile Assessment Click here
• The book: Mastering Leadership, Bob Anderson and Bill Adams, click here

2. Anne-Marie Marron

•  E-book: How to rewire limiting relationship patterns — to deepen trust and safety, by Anne-Marie Marron - Click here
• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
  • Power reclamation guide and somatic healing: www.anne-mariemarron.com
  • Leadership coach and organizational-culture consultant: www.revealingwisdom.com
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here

Rixt shares with us how she co-designed an integral leadership program for an executive based upon his desire to become a more integral leader through embracing more of his shadows. 

1. Rixt Kuiper:  

Rixt has been an international executive coach and leadership consultant for over 18 years. She is passionate about elevating business performance through the conscious practice of leadership. 

She has worked with a great variety of senior leaders and teams from 30+ countries, consulting for many Fortune 500 companies, focusing on conscious leadership for inclusion, innovation and whole system change.

Rixt brings evidence-informed coaching techniques to uncover and challenge limiting beliefs, assumptions and paradigms, stimulating fresh thinking and wholeness.

By coaching senior executives and their teams, she helps them to lead a peaceful revolution fueled by values, ethics and soul toward a future of meaning. 

To learn more about Rixt: 

• www.rixtkuiper.com 
• https://www.linkedin.com/in/rixtkuiper/

2. Rob Sinclair:

Rob is a highly sought-after leadership consultant, systemic team coach, and human development specialist. For the last 12 years Rob has spent his days working with leaders and teams from all over the globe at all levels - from startup founders/CEO’s and ivy-league MBA students to executive leaders at Salesforce, Honda, Ernst and Young, Conservation International, Roche Pharmaceuticals, Microsoft, and more. 

Leveraging insights from his 25+ years in the martial arts, a degree in biology, and his studies with some of the most cutting-edge practitioners in leadership development and systems change, Rob combines the latest advances in adult cognitive development, interpersonal neurobiology, agile transformation, and innovative systems evolution to work as a catalyst for the development of deeper servant leadership on behalf of a better world.

• Website: https://www.leadershipmasteryinc.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robasinclair/ 

3. The Leadership Circle: Lastly, I want to acknowledge the leadership circle, which is an organization focused on integral leadership. 

• https://leadershipcircle.com/en/

4. Anne-Marie Marron

• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
  • Power reclamation guide and somatic healing: www.anne-mariemarron.com
  • Leadership coach and organizational-culture consultant: www.revealingwisdom.com
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here

This conversation with Rixt Kuiper and Rob Sinclair is about integral leadership and shadow work.  How do we as leaders, consultants, healers, therapists and change-makers lead and love through exploring our personal projections and exiled parts of self?

1. Rixt Kuiper:  

Rixt has been an international executive coach and leadership consultant for over 18 years. She is passionate about elevating business performance through the conscious practice of leadership. 

She has worked with a great variety of senior leaders and teams from 30+ countries, consulting for many Fortune 500 companies, focusing on conscious leadership for inclusion, innovation and whole system change.

Rixt brings evidenced-informed coaching techniques to uncover and challenge limiting beliefs, assumptions and paradigms, stimulating fresh thinking and wholeness.

By coaching senior executives and their teams, she helps them to lead a peaceful revolution fueled by values, ethics and soul toward a future of meaning. 

To learn more about Rixt: 

• www.rixtkuiper.com 
• https://www.linkedin.com/in/rixtkuiper/

2. Rob Sinclair:

Rob is a highly sought-after leadership consultant, systemic team coach, and human development specialist. For the last 12 years Rob has spent his days working with leaders and teams from all over the globe at all levels - from startup founders/CEO’s and ivy-league MBA students to executive leaders at Salesforce, Honda, Ernst and Young, Conservation International, Roche Pharmaceuticals, Microsoft, and more. 

Leveraging insights from his 25+ years in the martial arts, a degree in biology, and his studies with some of the most cutting-edge practitioners in leadership development and systems change, Rob combines the latest advances in adult cognitive development, interpersonal neurobiology, agile transformation, and innovative systems evolution to work as a catalyst for the development of deeper servant leadership on behalf of a better world.

• Website: https://www.leadershipmasteryinc.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robasinclair/ 

3. The Leadership Circle: Lastly, I want to acknowledge the leadership circle, which is an organization focused on integral leadership. 

• https://leadershipcircle.com/en/

4. Anne-Marie Marron

• If you have a power reclamation story to share or questions, please send them to Ask Anne-Marie.
• If you want to learn more about my work you can visit my websites:
  • Power reclamation guide and somatic healing: www.anne-mariemarron.com
  • Leadership coach and organizational-culture consultant: www.revealingwisdom.com
• Find Anne-Marie on Instagram
• If you wonder whether Power Reclamation Coaching is for you, book a discovery call here