I recently watched a friend die. I was in the room, witnessing the unplugging of her life support while trying to support her family in their decision before and after it was done. It was the hardest day of my own life so far, by far. And as unprepared I was for the event and emotions, I also didn’t expect to become more prepared for my own death.

Talking about death has never scared me — It’s not like we can escape it— but I get why many of us want to avoid the topic, especially when it comes to our own eventual demise. Talking about death feels heavy, messy, and uncomfortably real. But what’s more frightening to me, is avoidance. The kind that leaves our loved ones guessing, unsure, and unprepared when everything falls apart.

The hardest part of planning for the inevitable isn’t the logistics—it’s finding the courage to start the conversation. But then I think about the alternative: the questions no one can answer because they didn’t ask. And now they have to make critical decisions leaving the weight of uncertainty hanging over the people I care about most. That’s what pushes me forward. Not because I’m fearless, but because I refuse to let fear have the last word.

You see, confidence doesn’t come before this type of conversation. It shows up in the middle of it, somewhere between the tears, the uncomfortable pauses, and the sighs of relief when you realize you’re finally saying the things that matter most.

And I want that for you, which is why this episode of the podcast is about The D Word.

Okay, stop everything and listen to this. I just interviewed the most INCREDIBLE woman on my podcast, and her story is going to blow your mind!

Picture this: A total rockstar Venezuelan electrical engineer with an MIT MBA, killing it at Microsoft, who suddenly decides to become a family photographer after suffering a concussion.

WHAT?

YES.

Andre's story is everything about confidence wrapped up in one wild ride. She went from managing massive corporate budgets to building a photography business that not only feeds her soul but makes MORE money than her corporate job. And get this—she did it while being present for her kids and completely redesigning her entire life.

And.. She was terrified. She lost her professional identity. People thought she was CRAZY. Her first clients would literally say things like, "You went to MIT and you're just a photographer?"

Instead of giving up, she was like, "Watch me."

Andre’s story is proof that confidence isn't about having everything figured out. It's about having the guts to completely reinvent yourself when something doesn't feel right.

Key takeaways from our conversation include:

• Your career path isn't carved in stone - it's clay you can reshape
• Sometimes a total life pivot is the most authentic move you can make
• Identity is fluid - your job title doesn't define your worth or potential
• You can choose to believe in yourself, even when others are skeptical

Boston-based Andre Toro is a former electrical engineer and MIT MBA grad turned-portrait photographer obsessed with fostering human connections and emotive storytelling through the images she captures. Learn more about her work at andretorophotography.com.

I can’t tell you how many times I hear it - “I could never.” It’s a phrase that drives me absolutely nuts because it’s such a convenient, self-imposed barrier.

Whether it’s someone telling me they could never write a book, do a TED Talk, or even wear a bold color, it’s the same mindset: shutting down possibility before it even has a chance to breathe.

And I can’t help myself; I always have to dig deeper. Do you really want to do the thing you’re dismissing? If not, that’s fine — own it! But if you do, then let’s stop hiding behind “I could never” and start figuring out how you can.

Confidence is a choice. This is a hill I will die on.

It’s not about being fearless—it’s about choosing to act in spite of your fears.

If you’ve ever felt stuck by fear of failure or rejection, this one’s for you. I’ll walk you through how to get past those feelings and turn your “I could never” into “I can” (and then celebrate when you do confidence isn’t just about you—it’s contagious— and when you share your wins, you inspire others to take their own leaps).

So, are you ready to start taking those first steps toward what you’ve been avoiding? Tune in now!

Hey, Confidence Crusaders! Neuro nerds! And dog lovers?

Yup!

This episode of Real Confidence is about to go to the DOGS. Stay with me — it’s not just about teaching Spot to sit. It’s about how your energy — your confidence — shapes your dog’s behavior (and maybe even your life).

Joining me is Brady Foulk, a pro dog trainer with a gift for turning "chaotic canine" into "calm and collected." But here's the twist: it’s not just about training your pup — it’s about training you.

And because we recently adopted a new puppy, Porter, after we had to say goodbye to our beloved rescue pooch Georgie last summer, I wanted all the tips because it’s been close to two decades since we had a little tail-wagger in the house.

Brady shared pro tips on how to inspire our dogs (no bribery or yelling required), spot when they’re overwhelmed (hello, frustrated sniffs!) and build their confidence step by step.

Whether you're a proud pet parent or just here for the confidence hacks, this episode’s got you. You’ll laugh, you’ll learn, and you’ll totally rethink how you approach leadership—with your dog and your life.

Key takeaways you don’t want to miss:

• Dogs can smell your emotions — yes, literally. If you’re anxious, they’re anxious. If you’re confident, they’re confident.
• Leadership matters — your dog mirrors your energy.
• Confidence is teachable — for you and your dog.
• How to read your dog’s body language for signs of overwhelm
• Fun fact: Brady’s puppy is learning to ride a skateboard. Yes, really!

Listen now and let’s sniff out some confidence together.

Brady is a committed dog trainer who loves helping dogs and their humans thrive together at home and out in the world. With extensive experience in canine behavior, obedience, emotional support, and service dog training, he has developed a practical, compassionate approach to building trust and confidence in dogs and their owners. Brady’s philosophy is simple: a confident, well-trained dog leads to a happier, more harmonious home life. Learn more about Brady and his work at newdirectiondogtraining.com.

I almost titled this episode “I Want My Bubble Back” and no, I don’t mean the pandemic lockdown days. I mean the good old days.

Or maybe I should say “my good old days” because we all have a version of those, when life seemed simpler, no matter our age. For me it was playing outside all day, coming home after dark, biking everywhere and worrying about little more than which what jeans were currently cool.

Ah, nostalgia.

But there’s the thing: those memories we cherish? They’re not necessarily accurate. Our brains love to soften the hard stuff, filter out the struggles, and create a highlight reel that doesn’t tell the whole story.

Our brains also want to tell us that our current challenges and struggles are harder than ever, but the truth is that challenges and struggles have always been part of our lives. Little ones—like sharing a curly cord, landline with your entire family, to big ones, like learning to navigate life after 9/11.

The thing I want us all to remember is that if we got through those, we have what it takes to do it again. We didn’t get through those times because we believed they were somehow easier. We got through them because we’re stronger than we think.

Tune in as I riff on the tricks our brains play on us, how those rose-colored glasses we view the past through are hurting us and how we can use our “good old days” memories instead to supercharge our confidence today.

It wasn’t that long ago that my sons were in their teens and the world has changed so much even since then. Teens face more and different challenges than we could have imagined when we were their age, and those challenges are doing a number on their confidence.

What’s one of the biggest confidence crises they’re facing today?

I had a fascinating conversation with Emily McCavanagh—fitness expert, teen confidence coach, and overall powerhouse—about that very thing. If you’re a parent, coach, or anyone who cares about the next generation, you’ll want to tune in, because we tackled that and so much more because while you might be tempted to point the finger at social media, that’s only part of it.

Sure, scrolling can lead to that toxic comparison game, but Emily peeled back the layers and got to the heart of it: teens are terrified of failing. And when you're too scared to fail, you never take the risks that build real confidence.

What I love about Emily’s work is how she flips the script on leadership. Her teen athlete Captain’s Collaborative program isn’t about being the toughest or most talented—it’s about being compassionate, courageous, and consistent. It’s leadership with heart, and it’s a total game-changer for young athletes who are expected to lead just because they’re good at their sport.

Spoiler alert: being really good at something doesn’t mean you’re inevitably confident at it!

Emily is on a mission to create a new generation of leaders—ones who aren't just strong on the field but empathetic, courageous, and ready to lift others up. And come on - who doesn’t want more of that in the world?

Highlights from our conversation include:

• How the fear of failure cripples teen confidence
• Why they—and we—should focus on their unique strengths rather than their “win-loss” record
• Flipping the script on what leadership means (it’s more than talent, by the way); and
• A powerful question parents or any adult can ask that sends the subtle message about winning and inspires confidence at the same time

https://www.facebook.com/emily.mccavanagh/

https://www.instagram.com/trainwithfitmethod/

I’m going to call BS on something we probably all heard as kids: sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.

I know we were all taught this rhyme to shut bullies up, but words do matter, and we don’t always appreciate how much.

Especially when they’re coming out of our mouths and we mean well – we truly do – but how they land has the opposite effect.

I’m as guilty of this as anyone. And it took me a really long time to realize how my good intentions could take someone’s confidence down instead of building it up, not just because of what I said, but how I said it and in what context.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I’ve zeroed in on five phrases that have the ability to kill our confidence when we hear them, and kill someone else’s when we say them.

These phrases seem benign but even when they’re offered in the spirit of support or helpfulness, can create fear. Fear of failure, regret or rejection – the three fears that really make us all question our confidence.

Listen in to find out what the phrases are, what you can say instead and/or respond confidently when someone says them to you. That way we can all try and be a little more compassionate to ourselves and to other people who do intend well, but don't always have the right words to tell us.

You know those conversations that stick with you long after they’re over? That’s exactly how I felt after chatting with Rich Kirkpatrick on my podcast. We dove deep into the relationship between confidence and creativity—not just the surface-level stuff, but how they can fuel each other.

Because creativity is one of those things that makes a lot of us want to shrink into the background so people won’t find out we don’t have it or what we create is amateurish or awful.

A musician, Rich talked about how during his early days in the music industry, confidence often felt like a façade and how he learned to separate his self-worth from external validation by reframing his self-talk. Instead of asking himself, “Am I good enough?” he began to ask, “What can I learn from this?”

That’s a subtle, common-sense shift, but really does change everything. Suddenly, confidence becomes a journey of growth rather than a destination to reach.

Ultimately, confidence and creativity are intertwined, each nurturing the other. When we believe in our abilities and embrace our authentic selves, we unlock the door to endless creative possibilities.

Key takeaways from this powerful conversation include how:

• Confidence isn’t about being loud or the center of attention; it’s about being grounded in who you are.
• Creativity isn't just for musicians, artists, or chefs—it’s for everyone. If you’re solving problems, you’re creating.
• There are two approaches to creativity he’s noticed, and some of us are “robots” while others are “wizards” (honestly, I bet most of us are a little bit of both).
• Authenticity breeds confidence, which you know I firmly believe, because when you’re true to yourself, you naturally project that energy and people can feel it!

Rich Kirkpatrick is a native of San Jose, California, studied music at The Phil Mattson School, and earned his bachelor’s and master’s from Jessup University. He writes, consults, and speaks about the intersection of creativity, faith and leadership. His book, MINDBLOWN: Unlock Your Creative Genius by Bridging Science and Magic (2022), deconstructs creativity and the creative process. To learn more about Rich, visit RKblog.com.