This week we are decoding secret demonic messages while we discuss “Daemonicus”! We’re talking how disgusting it is to cheat at Scrabble, Professor Scully, how much quippy Doggett really doesn’t work, the continuing saga of Scully emailing and driving, and how apparently Robert Patrick can’t remember his lines because of his fear of demons. Sure, buddy. We lose our minds a little bit at Doggett’s embarrassing theory, get grossed out because of all the vomit, wonder exactly how messy Reyes’ car is, and sigh a lot because apparently Doggett is in love with Scully. So is everyone, man, you’re not special!

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This week we are uncovering what must be the two-dozenth secret conspiracy at the FBI while we discuss “Nothing Important Happened Today II”! We’re talking how you just can’t tell your coworkers to zip it and cooperate, Brad and his squeaky chair, whether or not Scully is on quaaludes, how instantly hateable Brad is, and how the writing staff were really proud of their little tagline. We discover that Doggett can apparently just un-fire himself, wonder whether Skinner is going through nanobot withdrawal, laugh at the nightmare fakeout, and realize that of course Kersh is a hat guy. Phrase of the week: A little bureaucratic pimp job. You can’t just say that, Doggett!

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This week we are taking a swim with Lucy Lawless while we discuss “Nothing Important Happened Today I”! We’re talking Doggett and Reyes tummy sleepers lore, how much Cary Elwes is struggling his way through that American accent, how disgusting it is to stick your nasty fingers into your whiskey glass, how HR uses Mulder and Scully as a cautionary tale of workplace romance, and that The Lone Gunmen were let out of their government dungeon. We get scared of all the first names being tossed all over the place, celebrate Rowdy Held the baby actor, wonder what it is about slicked-back blonde hair that turns you evil, and have a heated debate over whether or not Scully called her baby Sweet Willy. Mulder’s a deadbeat dad, Scully abandoned Reyes in her hour of need and kicked Doggett out of her life, and Skinner is being a whiny loser about breaking into a top-secret facility. Tough look for our heroes this week!

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This week we are doing something a little different and taking a look back at Season 8 and The Lone Gunmen as a whole! We argue about whether or not sloughing off all your skin would be relaxing or not, add Chris Owens to the Famous Chris ranking (naturally), wonder if we need to do a T2 bonus episode, discuss the pros and cons of Mulder and Scully as parents, and have a very controversial ranking of “Patience”. We rank the episodes, recommend a few The Lone Gunmen episodes, answer emails and questions, assemble a bingo card/drinking game for listening to our podcast, and each assemble our own Topgolf Fantasy team and pit them head to head. It gets pretty intense.

Note: Check out our Topgolf Fantasy team poll on Instagram on December 5!

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This week we are joining an alien cult to witness the birth of Scully’s baby while we discuss “Existence”! We’re talking aliens parachuting out of a ship in race cars like in The Fast and the Furious, Skinner getting karate chopped in the head in the goofiest way possible, whether or not we’re still on the Crane Train, how Doggett’s Topgolf crew has been defecting all year, how this is Reyes’ fourth rodeo, and the ridiculous amount of Baby Jesus references. We discuss Mulder warning Doggett about secret informants, wonder what The Lone Gunmen got Scully as a gift, and (some of us) get sad that they massacred our boy! Also: welcome to yet another William in a long line of Williams. You were apparently named after Scuba Bill and nobody else.

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This week we are wrapping up The Lone Gunmen while we discuss “The Cap’n Toby Show” and “All About Yves”! We’re talking your classic hot dog mascot costume mixup, how grim it is that Jimmy is now living in their creepy warehouse with them, sexy spy fights, how we simply must stop making fun of Langly’s hair, and how we are now massive fans of the half-man half-crab Clarence the Crab. We have a hot debate on whether Morris Fletcher is fun to hate or just hateable, get sad that our Kimmy banishment didn’t work, get excited about the John Gillnitz cameo, want to see Fletcher really sleazing up a Backroom Boys meeting, wonder whether we’d rather spend a day with Fletcher or Kimmy, and get kind of sad that the show finally came into its own in the last episode. To be continued, my ass!

Note: Please submit Season 8 and The Lone Gunmen questions by Friday November 22nd!

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This week we are attending a species reveal party for Scully’s baby while we discuss “Essence”! We’re talking Margaret and Scully getting into mortal combat, karate chop decapitation, fake “friends” and “family” at this baby shower, Doggett conducting Doggett Activities (watching NASCAR and cleaning his gun), the strengthening evidence of Mulder’s cat energy, and wonder who can look more sad: Mulder or Doggett? The answer may surprise you. We cheer on the awkward evidence guy, wonder whether Reyes is just able to fast travel now, wonder whether Scully had a special evening with Zeus himself, debate just how long Krycek would have stood in that hallway, get really excited about Agent Crane and his radical airport controller moves, and lose our minds about Mulder pulling out of a parking spot. It has to be seen to be believed.

Note: Please submit Season 8 and The Lone Gunmen questions by November 23rd (or 23th)!

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This week we are infiltrating a tango competition and tracking down blackmailing brothers while we discuss The Lone Gunmen episodes “Tango de los Pistoleros” and “The Lying Game”! We’re talking baby boy Schnauz, Frohike’s Miami trauma, how the only excitement these boys get is playing catch with toilet paper, how Ella summoned Kimmy back into existence, the Frojack, and secret tango pasts. We welcome back Skinner: the real star of the show, note that Byers has a type (mysterious blonde women with ugly sunglasses), theorize that Doggett is a big ellipsis guy, get really scared of Jimmy in a Skinner mask, celebrate Ally Byers, and answer the age-old question of whether Skinner would sleep with his clone. Also, we celebrate the show giving us the greatest Skinner line of all time: I’m taking your computer and shutting off your internet service. This is going to be the next big X-Files meme. Mark our words.

Note: Please submit Season 8 and The Lone Gunmen questions by November 23rd (or 23th)!

Send us an email at scullynationpod@gmail.com or follow us on Twitter and Instagram!