As a parent or someone in a parenting role, you play an essential role in your teen’s success. There are intentional ways to grow a healthy parent-teen relationship and ensure they develop a healthy relationship with technology.

Technology use has become essential to your teen’s life and learning in school. It has the potential to play a role in:

● social and emotional development[1]

● language development

● connection to friends, family, and others

● academic learning

● empathy and understanding of others

● imagination

● ability to choose healthy behaviors (preventing high-risk behaviors and unhealthy choices)

Teens ages 15-19 range from the middle of adolescence to their emerging adult years beginning at ages 18-19, where they will cultivate their independent identity. Additionally, they’ll experiment with and learn social skills through forging and prioritizing friendships and peer opinions. They will create more independent relationships with teachers, coaches, and you while demonstrating competence or mastery in extracurricular activities like sports, music, or other areas.

Yet, technology can pose challenges. Nationally, the majority of parents say that parenting is harder than it was twenty years ago, and most point to technology as the primary reason.^1 Let’s take a deeper look at the screen time habits of this age group: ^2

- 15-18-year-olds are on screens an average of 8-9 hours per day, with boys an average of one hour longer than girls. Most of this screen time is spent watching online videos.

- The second most utilized technology is video gaming, with 39% of teens reporting they enjoy gaming “a lot” and an average usage of nearly two hours daily.

Screen time can take away time from family being together and growing intimate connections. Indeed, addiction can become a real threat as those jolts of happy hormones (dopamine) are fueled; infinite scrolling is the norm on social media, and games are programmed to keep them perpetually engaged. Daily device use can take time away from other critical pursuits for their physical, social, emotional, and cognitive development, such as reading, playing outdoors, unstructured creative time, friend time, homework, and more. The kinds of content that a teen can view or stumble into online can range from mildly irritating to disturbing and dangerous, whether it involves repeated consumer messages, cartoon violence, graphic violence, fake news, or even pornography. Additionally, teens can encounter social aggression and bullying online and through social media, which can hurt uniquely since they can be more publicly exposed than most in-person incidents.

We know that growing a healthy relationship with technology requires regular conversations and a commitment from the whole family to become intentional about their use of technology, including appropriate boundaries and safety practices. Approach this topic with empathy and recognize that the devices and apps are designed to make the user stay engaged and want more. Acknowledge with your teen that adults have difficulty setting boundaries with technology use. While it may take more time, planning, and encouragement with your teen to develop a healthy relationship with technology, its role can become a joyful experience, enrich your family life, and promote valuable skills for school and life success. It can also prepare your teen for a lifetime of wise habits...