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Wanna arm wrestle? I'd probably win. I was recently diagnosed 100% manly. I know. You're probably like, 'Obvi Rob.' Well, I wasn't so sure. Luckily, the internet never let's me down.

On today's episode, Rob quizzes Matt and Mike to find out how manly they are. And, because we believe ALL men must meet a certain level of manliness to remain in the manliness club, we've provided the link to our quiz here. Quiz it and tell us how manly you are.

Keywords

therapy, manliness, masculinity, leadership, manly movies, asking for help, sense of style, societal expectations, manliness quiz, self-acceptance, individuality

Takeaways

• The concept of masculinity is explored through a manliness quiz and discussions about personal preferences. Masculinity is subjective and can vary depending on the individual and the situation.
• Personal preferences and hobbies do not define one's masculinity.
• Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
• There is no right or wrong answer when it comes to personal style.
• Gender stereotypes and societal expectations should not dictate one's choices and preferences. Masculinity is a concept that is often defined by societal expectations and stereotypes.
• Quizzes and labels can limit our understanding of ourselves and others.
• It is important to be confident in one's true self and not conform to societal norms.
• Self-acceptance and embracing individuality are key to personal growth and happiness.

Sound Bites

• "You guys are both gonna come out as 100% manliness"
• "One of you got 75% manly. And the other one got 100% manly."
• "You're always willing to take risks and nothing seems to scare you. And like a real man, you approach your problems and obstacles directly."
• "I'm confident in my masculinity, even if I barely rate 60% masculine."

Chapters

00:49
Vacation Plans and Work Commitments

05:49
Navigating Therapy Experiences

12:16
Exploring the Concept of Manliness

21:04
Embracing Vulnerability and Asking for Help

23:14
The Joy of Pets: Cats vs. Dogs

25:04
Discovering New Hobbies and Interests

32:21
Subjectivity of Alcoholic Beverage Preferences

36:17
Exploring the Concept of Masculinity

41:55
The Results: 75% Manly vs. 100% Manly

51:45
The Fun of Quizzes and Competing

53:12
Questioning the Definition of Masculinity

56:55
The Desire for Acceptance and Belonging

59:24
Embracing Authenticity and Rejecting Societal Norms

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Come on now, space-cyborg! You're not so bad! In fact, I dare say you might even be a real stand-up guy. Probably doing better than you think. And we'll talk about that today on The Manspace.

Matt, Mike, and Rob explore how we beat ourselves up and hold ourselves to unrealistic standards that usually do us no good. We'll talk about self-compassion and will say it in the most cheesy, unsettling of ways. So, pull up a chair. Be nice to yourself. Listen to The Manspace.

Keywords

self-demanding behavior, beating oneself up, nice guy syndrome, internal struggle, negative self-talk, self-compassion, grace, unconditional love, external criticism, projection, defense mechanism, self-doubt, acceptance, kindness, limitations, comparative language, integrity

Takeaways

• Self-demanding behavior and beating oneself up can be overlapping and interconnected.
• Self-compassion and grace are important in counteracting negative self-talk and high self-demands.
• External criticism can confirm and amplify negative self-perception.
• Projection of buried grievances onto others is a defense mechanism.
• Understanding and addressing these patterns can lead to healthier self-perception and relationships. Avoid self-blame and negative self-talk when facing challenges or setbacks.
• Practice self-compassion by accepting and acknowledging your struggles.
• Talk to yourself with kindness and understanding, as you would to a good friend.
• Recognize your limitations and focus on your strengths.
• Avoid comparing yourself to others and prioritize your own values and beliefs.
• Maintain integrity by aligning your actions with your personal values.

Sound Bites

• "That self-demanding part of myself pushes me to go over the top and over function for them too."
• "Treating myself like a human being and being kind to myself feels really calming."
• "I hate when clients say stuff like, 'I know, I suck at everything.' Don't do that, man."
• "The markers we have that we are doing a good job... They're not usually quantifiable."
• "What's the limits of self-compassion? What's the limits of self-care? There has to be limits."

Chapters

00:00
Navigating the Internal Struggle: Self-Criticism and Mental Health

09:53
The 'Nice Guy' Syndrome: Impact of Societal Standards

20:56
Navigating Self-Compassion and Integrity

28:17
The Struggle with Negative Self-Talk

43:25
Balancing Inner Dialogue and Recognizing Limitations

01:03:08
Aligning Actions with Core Values

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Shhhh. The Manspace is on. On today's episode, we record dead air for you to *not* listen to.
Fine. Not really. But we DO talk about it. I know what you're thinking. "Hey Rob, didn't you guys just barely talk about silence?" Yes, Spaceman, we did. But before, we talked about knowing the times it's good to be quiet in relationships and conversations. This time, it's more using silence as a meditative state. We talk about why it's helpful and how to make it a more deliberate focus. So gather your friends around and tell them to shut up. Then sit in silence. Then turn on the episode and learn why that was good for you.

Keywords

silence, solitude, audible silence, emotional silence, thought silence, responsibility silence, nature, intentional silence, men, fear, discomfort, alone time, benefits, concentration, creativity, self-awareness, learning, productivity, calm, restorative power, meaning, value, present moment, personal values, joy, relaxation,

Takeaways

• There may be a biological and evolutionary need for silence and solitude.
• Being deliberate and intentional in silence can help manage our thoughts and emotions.
• Spending time in nature can enhance the benefits of silence.
• Finding time for silence in our busy lives can be a challenge, but it is important for our well-being. Men often fear and feel uncomfortable taking time for themselves and embracing silence and solitude.
• Wives are often supportive of their husbands needing alone time and would encourage it.
• The fear of silence leads to filling every moment with noise and distractions.
• Silence and solitude have numerous benefits, including increased concentration, creativity, self-awareness, learning, productivity, and a sense of calm.
• Shift your focus from constantly striving for more to finding meaning and value in the present moment.
• Prioritize activities that align with your personal values and bring joy and relaxation.
• Incorporate solitude and silence into your daily life, such as by getting up early or avoiding distractions.
• Be deliberate and intentional in creating meaningful experiences.

Sound Bites

• "Silence is a source of great strength"
• "Matt yesterday almost picked up a hooker"
• "Silence for silence sake is probably meaningless"
• "How do I actually get the most out of the time that I'm in now?"
• "I don't value making more money. I value spending time doing the things I want to do."

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Remember in The Little Mermaid when Ursula was like, "and don't underestimate the importance of..BODY LANGUAGE!" in a way that is a little too much for kids to handle? And adults for that matter? I do. Don't act like you don't remember. Own your love of Disney. It's okay.

Today, spacebirds, Matt, Mike, and Rob talk about body language. Not in an Ursula kind of way, just in a difference between men and women kind of way. We talk about men finding ways to connect that are sometimes mislabeled avoidant or even homophobic. Really, we are trying to connect through body language just like everyone else. Don't believe me? Listen in and find out. Even AI called the episode "light-hearted and filled with humor." You can't miss.

Keywords
Communication styles, men, women, face-to-face, shoulder-to-shoulder, confrontational, emotional connection, men, women, connection, intimacy, playfulness, physical touch, comfort zone

Takeaways

• The hosts have a playful banter throughout the conversation. Men and women have different communication styles and preferences.
• Men often prefer standing or sitting at right angles to each other, while women often prefer face-to-face interaction.
• Men may perceive face-to-face as confrontational, while women view it as fostering emotional connection and honesty.
• Communication styles vary widely among individuals and there are no one-size-fits-all rules. Men and women have different ways of connecting and expressing intimacy
• Recognize and accept these differences to foster connection and intimacy in relationships
• Balance playfulness and lightheartedness with deep emotional intimacy
• Physical touch and play can be powerful ways for men to connect with their children
• Pushing oneself out of their comfort zone can foster growth and connection

Sound Bites

• "Welcome to the Man Space."
• "I gotta start making sweatshirts."
• "Maximizing profits with a downline."
• "If you're talking to a guy, we stand at right angles to each other, not face to face."
• "Men perceive face to face as confrontational, while women view it as more honest and intimate."
• "Men and women have different communication styles and preferences."
• "Men are saying, this is how I feel comfortable being intimate with you."
• "Men can connect through play and physical touch without needing eye contact."

Chapters

00:00
Introduction and Discussion on Discomfort

01:58
Planning and Experiencing a Vacation in Punta Cana

09:28
Geography and Location of Punta Cana

12:18
Seaweed Troubles at the Beach

30:03
Intimacy and Protection in Men's Communication Styles

36:28
The Role of Play in Father-Child Bonding

43:08
Balancing Deep Emotional Intimacy and Lighthearted Playfulness

48:21
Accepting Different Forms of Intimacy

52:59
Maintaining Closeness Through Physical Touch and Play

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Spaceabichuelos! I don't know how to spell that and it doesn't even matter. I just called you spacebeans, which is one of many insight you will gain listening to today's episode. Today, we're talking about being alone with your partner. We'll give you some hot tips and cool riffs, just like Ross Cowan in high school. Top-hat wearin' Ross.

We talk about the 1/1/1 and the 7/7/7 ratio of spending time with your spouse. Don't know what those are? Don't worry my little beans--we'll tell you. So grab your spouse, both metaphorically and literally, and listen in.

Keywords
vacations, quality time, one-one-one rule, seven-seven-seven rule, fashion trends, dates, relationships, reconnect, responsibilities, distractions, intentional, mindful

Takeaways

• Taking vacations as a couple is important for maintaining a strong relationship
• The one-one-one rule (one date per week, one day together per month, one vacation per year) is a helpful guideline for spending quality time together
• Setting aside time for each other away from responsibilities and distractions is important
• Vacations and dates can help couples reconnect and remember why they love each other
• Transitioning into vacation mode can be challenging, but being intentional and mindful can help
• Incorporating elements of vacation and date mindset into regular routines can keep the relationship strong

Sound Bites

• "Welcome space beans"
• "Who eats this for breakfast?"
• "The untouched didn't happen"
• "Before we get into this massively transformational."
• "Almost everybody I've asked, I can't think of anybody who hasn't answered me this way."
• "There's a mistake in believing if you do these things, your relationship will be repaired."

Chapters
00:00
Nostalgia for 90s Fashion Trends and Music

02:45
Exploring Regional Accents and Concert Experiences

08:44
The Fascination with Texas Accents

13:37
Introduction to the importance of vacations

22:09
Rules and guidelines for planning vacations

27:34
The transformative nature of vacations

29:42
Incorporating vacation elements into everyday life

31:59
The Importance of Making Time for Vacations and Dates

32:47
Transitioning into Vacation Mode: The Need for Intentional Effort

33:51
Exploring New Places and Activities Together

44:29
The Role of Planning and Responsibility in a Relationship

47:07
Trying New Things to Keep the Spark Alive

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Calm down spacemen. Today, Matt, Mike, and Rob rationally delve into the wide world of logic. I know what you're thinking, "Hey Rob, didn't guys do a previous episode on the necessity of emotions over logic?" Yes, you have a point there. But what sort of men of space would we be if we could not confidently state, "We were wrong!" And by 'wrong' we mean, we have more to say on the subject that will clarify things. Spoiler alert, it involves balancing logic and emotion. We are nothing if not balanced.

Keywords
logic, emotion, relationships, perception, couples therapy, communication, understanding, problem-solving, relationships, societal expectations, validation, trust

Takeaways

• Different people interpret and perceive emotions differently, and context plays a significant role.
• Logic and emotion both have a place in relationships, and it's important to find a balance.
• In couples therapy, it is common to ask men to connect with their emotions and women to engage their logical thinking.
• Balancing logic and emotion is crucial in relationships, as both perspectives are valuable and necessary.
• Effective communication involves understanding and respecting each other's ways of thinking and processing information.
• Both partners should be able to move between the logical and emotional realms
• Therapists play a role in helping clients navigate these dynamics
• Validating emotions while encouraging logical thinking is important
• Trust and recognizing each other's capacities are key to successful conversations

Sound Bites

• "This podcast is the raddest of them all"
• "Your salad's not really cutting it"
• "I liked it, actually"
• "Women, Logic Up."
• "Get out of my dreams, get into my car."
• "I know it feels like I'm being dismissive, but right now you're getting so flooded."
• "Our society has decided logic is more better"
• "At some point we have to learn how to separate what we're hearing emotionally and applying some amount of logic to it"
• "How often do we ask women what they think?"

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Bruhs, let's play the quiet game. You start, cause I have a lot to say. But fair warning, the audio of what I say will be horrible today. I don't know why. It's unknowable.

On today's episode, Matt, Mike, and Rob explore the importance of silence in various situations. We also touch on the moments in life where it is best to stay silent, according to psychology. And, AND, we extend a call to (in)action. Try it out, you'll thank us.

Keywords

silence, teaching, teenagers, psychology, moments in life, staying silent, support, empathy, listening

Takeaways

• Silence can be an effective teaching tool, especially with teenagers.
• There are moments in life where it is best to stay silent, according to psychology.
• Silence allows others to be the expert and can boost their confidence.
• Listening and being present in the moment can be powerful forms of support and empathy.

Sound Bites

• "That was my cue to ask the question again. So I would, and I usually ask it in a more playful joking way."
• "Silent but violent."
• "They just needed to be together."

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I'm telling that you did that. You're gonna be in SO MUCH trouble. It's okay spacemen, you can admit it. There's no Alphas in the room with you who will mock you. You're in a safe space. We all have fears of upsetting someone. In fact, even though most people will say they don't care about what people think, pretty much EVERYONE does. So, we tackle that today on the show.

Matt, Mike, and Rob explore the feeling of constantly being in trouble or disappointing others, both in relationships and in other areas of life. We talk about how men often express this sentiment and the sources of this feeling, such as societal expectations, authority figures, and fear of disappointing others. And we talk about the common experience of men feeling like they are always in trouble and the impact it can have on their well-being. Spoiler alert, we talk about the importance of having open and honest conversations, understanding and owning one's emotions, and embracing the humanity of the human experience.

Keywords
feeling in trouble, disappointing others, relationships, societal expectations, authority figures, anxiety, stress, fear of disappointing, being in trouble, societal expectations, childhood experiences, open and honest conversations, owning emotions, humanity

Takeaways

• Many men express the feeling of constantly being in trouble or disappointing others. This feeling can arise in relationships, work, and other areas of life.
• Societal expectations and the fear of disappointing authority figures contribute to this feeling.
• Anxiety and stress often perpetuate the belief that one is always in trouble. The fear of disappointing others is often rooted in societal expectations and childhood experiences.
• Having open and honest conversations can help address and overcome the fear of disappointing others.
• Understanding and owning one's emotions is crucial in navigating relationships and communication.
• Embracing the humanity of the human experience allows for more authentic and meaningful connections.

Sound Bites

• "Do you always feel like you're in trouble? Because I feel that all the time."
• "I'm doing something wrong and some overarching authority figure is gonna be mad at me and I'm in trouble."
• "I feel like I am behind, I'm failing somewhere, someone's gonna be disappointed."
• "I don't always get the men telling me this is what I felt. I have to share. This is what I've felt."
• "Where did this come from for me? Because we didn't necessarily grow up in a home where..."
• "I just default in that realm, I defaulted over into he's my dad. I'm the kid who doesn't know anything."

Chapters

00:00
The Constant Feeling of Being in Trouble

18:52
Defaulting to Partners as Authority Figures

35:39
Breaking Free from Societal Expectations

44:40
Understanding and Owning Your Emotions

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