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Noted political analysts and knick-knack collectors Adam and Jeff offer their opinions about what they view as an appalling display of prosecutorial, judicial and jury bias in the New York case in which Donald Trump was found guilty 34 times for the same expired misdemeanor that had somehow been magically bootstrapped into a federal election law violation. Because the district attorney, Alvin Bragg, managed to stretch the limits of the law out beyond the orbit of the planet Pluto, Trump was found guilty by a jury of his quasi-peers who were drawn from a pool that voted 90% in favor of his opponent, President-for-Life Joe Biden, in the last election. As a result, these jurors were thus just possibly not concerned with Trump's guilt being established beyond a reasonable doubt or even at all. Adam and Jeff believe that the case will eventually be overruled due to its numerous procedural and substantive errors, but they are convinced that this attempt to pin any sort of conviction on Trump will send a strong signal to businesses in New York and businesses considering doing business in New York that they might want to consider a locale with a more democratic system of justice such as Moscow or Beijing or Pyongyang. Jeff points out that this decision will certainly end any discussions by the corporate brass at the Omaha Bugle to locate a news bureau in New York City--which will no doubt cause the city overlords much loss of sleep and prestige. The decision has also prompted the Omaha Bugle to reconsider its policy of paying disgruntled former employees to keep quiet because they always open their mouths to the media as soon as the checks to purchase their silence have been cashed. Finally, Jeff declares in solidarity with the founding fathers that he will not purchase an apartment that he cannot afford in New York City under any circumstances.