Shame often keeps us from living the full, expansive life we’re desiring. In this episode of You Make Sense, Sarah explains the difference between “healthy” and “unhealthy” shame, and why unresolved trauma can often leave us feeling unworthy or like there is something inherently wrong with us.

While shame can affect every area of our lives, from our relationships to our purpose, the good news is that it’s absolutely possible to heal. Sarah will walk you through tangible somatic steps to bring your nervous system back into internal safety and access your healthy aggression or “life force energy,” both of which are imperative to releasing shame and finding freedom in your everyday life.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:26 What is Healthy Shame?

04:29 What is Unhealthy Shame?

11:55 How the Internalization of Shame Occurs

13:59 How to Resolve Unhealthy Shame

18:43 Accessing Healthy Aggression

21:25 Parts Work & Embodying Your Creativity

27:10 Processing the Underlying Activation of Panic Attacks

33:17 Being Ferociously Protective of Your Own Story

37:52 Shame Around Experiencing Setbacks

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Looking for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live somatic healing course that will help you to address your relationships, purpose, younger parts, boundaries, thoughts, and more!

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Important Keywords:

Healthy Shame - Healthy shame teaches individuals about boundaries, consequences, and experiencing health in relationships and life. It begins to occur during early developmental stages and builds resilience to navigate stress and be with affect in our bodies. In the process, we are not made to feel like we are inherently bad or unlovable.

Unhealthy Shame - Unhealthy shame is the internalization of what happened to us (or what was said to us) making one feel inherently bad and unworthy. This type of shame is often rooted in traumatic experiences and can result in long-lasting psychological distress.

Nervous System Regulation - Nervous system regulation involves managing the body's response to stress and stimuli through various techniques that help maintain or restore a state of balance. It is crucial for emotional resilience and overall mental health.

Somatic Experiencing - Somatic Experiencing is a modality developed by Peter Levine that uses the body to release stored trauma and activation. This approach is grounded in science that confirms the body holds past trauma, and that through somatic healing and completing the incomplete experience, we can release the stored traumatic energy and consequently, the past becomes the past rather than the perpetual present.

Trauma - Trauma is the overwhelm of activation (energy) experienced in our bodies, in the face of helplessness. If we do not have the conditions necessary for trauma to process through our bodies, it becomes stuck and stored, leaving lasting emotional, physical or psychological imprints. It disrupts the nervous system causing chronic dysregulation, disconnection and/or hypervigilance.

Internalization - Internalization is a psychological process where individuals unconsciously integrate the beliefs, values, and norms of others into their own self-view. In the context of shame, it often refers to the absorption of negative beliefs about oneself that are derived from critical or dismissive messaging and treatment by others.

Diving into the often overlooked but deeply interconnected realms of science and spirituality, Sarah guides listeners through a transformative exploration. She underscores how both domains intertwine, particularly in the context of trauma and healing. Many of us desire to embody the core elements of spirituality—connectivity, presence, love, and surrender—but struggle to actually do so.

This episode will address the common misconceptions and challenges associated with spirituality, including the impact of trauma on our capacity to experience deep levels of connectivity. She critiques the prevalent shaming in spiritual contexts, advocating for a more empathetic and inclusive approach.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

01:36 What is Spirituality?

07:56 Most Trauma is Relational

15:58 Processing Your Anger Toward the Universe

22:53 Unlocking Connectivity to Your Spirituality

31:51 Spiritual Journey and Nervous System Work

33:19 Healing is Spiritual Work

41:54 “How Does Plant Medicine Relate to the Nervous System?”

49:35 “Why Do I Feel Like I Have No Spiritual Connection?”

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Important Keywords:

Trauma Resolution - A process aimed at addressing and healing from traumatic experiences. Trauma resolution involves somatic therapeutic techniques that help individuals process and discharge stored traumatic energy from their bodies, reducing the ongoing impact on their mental and physical health.

Nervous System Regulation - Refers to the practices and techniques used to maintain or return the nervous system to a state of balance. Effective regulation helps individuals manage their responses to stress and recover from experiences of chronic dysregulation, such as anxiety, depression, overwhelm, panic, or other trauma-related symptoms.

Interconnectivity - A key concept in spirituality that denotes the interconnected nature of all things in the universe, including the self, others, and the environment. It suggests that everything is linked, and leaning into these connections can lead to deeper levels of regulation and support overall wellbeing.

Spirituality - Often defined broadly as a sense of connection to something bigger than oneself, which can involve a search for meaning in life. Spirituality is personal and can encompass religious beliefs, personal values, and practices aimed at cultivating inner peace, deeper connectivity, love, and surrender.

Somatic Experiencing - A therapeutic modality developed by Dr. Peter Levine aimed at resolving the mental, emotional, and physical symptoms of stored trauma by focusing on the body.

The secret to changing your thoughts isn’t in your mind—it’s in your body. In this episode of You Make Sense, Sarah uses Polyvagal Theory to unravel the fascinating science behind how our nervous system shapes our story and why just telling ourselves to “think” differently doesn’t actually work.

In order to change our thinking, we must first address the underlying dysregulation in our system. Sarah will walk you through tangible somatic practices to shift toward regulation, create new neural pathways for more “positive” thoughts, and find clarity on your truth. By harnessing the power of your nervous system, it’s possible to transform your inner world.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:49 Our Autonomic State Creates Our Story

07:29 Thoughts in Dorsal (Immobilization)

09:19 Thoughts in Sympathetic (Mobilization)

11:15 Thoughts in Freeze (Tonic Immobility)

12:38 Thoughts in Ventral (Regulation)

15:09 Projecting Your Past Onto the Present

17:03 We Cannot Change Our Thinking in Dysregulation

20:20 Limitations of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

28:09 “Why Do Thoughts I Know To Be Wrong Feel So True?”

36:58 How to Overcome Negative Thoughts

44:29 Mindset Work & Manifestation From A Somatic Lens

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Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

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Contact Us:

Have questions? Want to let us know how you’re liking the podcast? Reach out to Sarah’s support team at media@sarahbaldwincoaching.com.

Important Keywords:

Nervous System - The nervous system regulates bodily functions and responses to stress, consisting of the sympathetic (fight/flight) and parasympathetic (rest/digest) systems, comprised of our ventral vagal complex (rest and digest) and our dorsal vagal complex (shutdown/energy conservation). A well-regulated nervous system supports emotional balance, overall well-being, and supportive thoughts.

Polyvagal Theory - A theory developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, explaining how the autonomic nervous system responds to safety or threat through three primary states: Ventral Vagal Complex (regulation and connection), Sympathetic Nervous System (mobilization), and Dorsal Vagal Complex (immobilization). This framework helps understand how our physiological state influences thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and perception.

Dysregulation - Active self-protection in response to real or perceived threats, leading to physiological and emotional imbalance. It can manifest as anxiety, depression, apathy, or other distressing emotions and can hinder clear thinking or positive actions.

Sympathetic Nervous System - The branch of the autonomic nervous system associated with mobilization or the fight-or-flight response. When activated, it increases energy, heart rate, and alertness to prepare for action.

Dorsal Vagal Complex - A part of the parasympathetic nervous system responsible for immobilization or the shutdown response. It activates in extreme situations of perceived danger, leading to feelings of numbness, dissociation, or hopelessness.

Ventral Vagal Complex - The branch of the parasympathetic nervous system associated with regulation, safety, connection, and presence. It supports social engagement, calmness, and the ability to rest and recover.

Freeze Response - A blended state made of equal parts mobilizing Sympathetic energy and immobilizing Dorsal energy, creating a sense of urgency to act but an inability to do so. It often feels like being "stuck" or overwhelmed.

Perceived Threat - A situation or stimulus that the nervous system interprets as dangerous, even if it is not an immediate danger in reality. It often stems from past trauma being projected onto the present.