Addiction Memoirs

I am Carrie Carlisle, and if you have two hours to listen to this book, you're about to go on a journey with me that will finally free you from binge drinking and hangovers, permanently.

Homosexuality, prostitution, pornography, cults--secret sins rival the glitter of Hollywood for young actor David Kyle Foster. Winning wholesome television roles, his star on the rise, he is relieved to be free from his father's harshness. But the desperate loneliness and sexual obsession that characterized his youth now accompany his rise to success and bondage to a double life seems the only answer. Can Jesus' love reach one so broken?

Famously neurotic comedian Richard Lewis finds himself on a gurney in the ER at the age of 44, hallucinating from excess cocaine use and his body poisoned by acute alcoholism. The same dysfunctions that had been the basis for his successful stage persona and inspired his best material had, it seemed, turned on him. In this very funny, deeply honest, and inspiring book, Lewis explores how he got there, how he finally got on the road to recovery, and how he copes with being Richard Lewis sober on a daily basis.

In 2014, novelist Leslie Schwartz was sentenced to 90 days in Los Angeles County Jail for a DUI and battery of an officer. It was the most harrowing and holy experience of her life. Following a 414-day relapse into alcohol and drug addiction after more than a decade sober, Schwartz was sentenced and served her time with only six months' sobriety. The damage she inflicted that year upon her friends, her husband, her daughter, and herself was nearly impossible to fathom. Incarceration might have ruined her altogether, if not for the stories that sustained her while she was behind bars.

New York Times journalist David Itzkoff crafts a powerful, remarkably honest memoir that no listener will ever forget. Growing up, David understood his father to be a trusted ally and confidant—a man who always had some hard-won wisdom to share. But he was also a junkie. As David grew older, he fell into the same trap, until he and his father hit the road in search of their “morning after.

If you are born into ineffable darkness, can you even comprehend the light? Take one-part volatile home life, two-parts haphazard nomadic existence, zero-parts social connection, and shake well. Our protagonist's only constant is unpredictability: that, and the charismatic, fundamentalist hammerings from the pulpit. But, when a sheltered child goes nuclear? Just pray you are far from the exclusion zone.

After struggling with anxiety and depression during her formative years, Margy turned to alcohol to self-medicate and quieten her inner turmoil. Through two failed marriages and fractured relationships, a teaching career spanning 32 years, and two children, Margy finally kicked the wine witch to the curb and found her own voice.

Abandoned by his mother at birth, Kevin was enveloped in a labyrinth of adoption, addiction, and child sexual abuse. By age 20, a shell of the boy he once was, Kevin succumbed completely to a suicidal lifestyle of drug dealing and prostitution. At 45, after many years of recovery, Kevin began a painful journey to uncover his origins, and the hopeful search for his mother. Dear Stephen Michael’s Mother chronicles the unfolding of these two stories.

William didn't know something was missing until it happened. He'd been in recovery for alcohol and drugs for years. He was a recovery activist and a spokesperson for the gold standard of treatment and recovery organizations. He was a model leader and follower of Twelve Step programs. But, still, he slipped. Privately, he was addicted to painkillers while publicly saying he was in recovery from alcohol and drug use. How did it go so wrong? With brutal honesty and introspection, William shares what happened after sobriety—after he'd published his memoir.

Ryan never envisioned just how far his football career would take him. But bubbling under the surface of his entire NFL career was a collision course between his secret sexuality and his hidden drug use. As injuries mounted and his daily intake of opioids reached a near-lethal level, he wrote his suicide note to his parents and plotted his death. Yet, someone had been watching. A member of the Chiefs organization stepped in, recognizing the signs of drug addiction. Ryan reluctantly sought psychological help, and it was there that he revealed his lifelong secret for the very first time.

Since he was a young boy, Joe Balzer dreamed of flying. He pursued his goal with passion and earned his pilot licenses, piling up hours of flight time with a wide variety of planes and jets with one overarching goal: to one day fly for a major airline. But Joe had a problem. He was an alcoholic and refused to admit to himself that he had a problem. His alcoholism caught up with him in March 1990, when Joe was arrested with two other pilots for flying a commercial airliner while under the influence of alcohol.

All I ever wanted was to be loved and accepted. That's all. Now I am strung out on heroin, more vulnerable than ever, and clinically depressed. My entire existence is controlled by heroin and the need to escape reality. My rationality is being dominated, paralyzed, and defeated by another entity.

Patrick J. Kennedy, the former congressman and youngest child of Senator Ted Kennedy, details his personal and political battle with mental illness and addiction, exploring mental health care's history in the country alongside his and every family's private struggles. A Common Struggle weaves together Kennedy's private and professional narratives, echoing Kennedy's philosophy that for him, the personal is political and the political personal.

Like the never-ending war on terror, the drugs war is a multi-billion-dollar industry that won’t go down without a fight. Pills, Powder, and Smoke explains why. The war on drugs has been official American policy since the 1970s, with the UK, Europe and much of the world following suit. It is at best a failed policy, according to best-selling author Antony Loewenstein. Its direct results have included mass incarceration in the US, extreme violence in different parts of the world, the backing of dictatorships and surging drug addiction globally.

Confessions of an English Opium-Eater is a graphic, honest, autobiographical account written by Thomas De Quincey, about his laudanum addiction and its profound effect on his life. Confessions was the first major work De Quincey published and the one which won him lasting fame. This intensely riveting audiobook edition is therefore a must for all those interested in the pharmacological arts, altered states, the pitfalls of addiction, and the age-old quest for expanded consciousness.

Four psychiatric wards. Three rehabs. Two jail cells. And a suicide attempt. Hannah was told she would not make it to 25 with the way she was living. She had struggled with mental illness her entire life, but at 22,her demons came to a head at the grips of severe substance abuse, life-changing trauma, and two major deaths in her life. Hannah’s struggles land her places no one ever hopes to grace; jail and psych wards lead her to the brink of death. Running out of options, she’s left with two choices: live or die.

Jared Kindred left his home and family at the age of eighteen, choosing to wander across America on freight train cars and live on the street. Addicted to alcohol most of his short life, and withholding the truth from many who loved him, he never found a way to survive. Through this ordeal, Dave Kindred's love for his grandson has never wavered.

In 1990, while covering a story about homelessness for the New Orleans Times-Picayune, Ted Jackson encountered a drug addict sleeping under a bridge. After snapping a photo, Jackson woke the man. Pointing to the daily newspaper by his feet, the homeless stranger looked the photojournalist in the eye and said, “You ought to do a story about me.” When Ted asked why, he was stunned by the answer. “Because, I’ve played in three Super Bowls.”

This is a very real and bloody look at the journey I made from 19 to 29. I will walk you through the icy halls of drug addiction and dealing, college in Santa Barbara (specifically Isla Vista), depression, suicide, and overdoses. The second part of the book I could only write just recently, as I was, by the Grace of God, able to live the life I knew I always should. Please come with me through the very real and honest look at what it was like to be a young man in the 2010s and how through a million close calls, I finally found life.

Bobby grew up on the streets of San Francisco in the 50’s and 60’s. Married at 17 and a small-time Marijuana dealer moves further into crime and addiction. Joined the US Navy at age 28, trying to get away from the street life, loses his family and himself in Skid Row of Los Angeles. “The Nickel” Finds redemption and recovery in a free county-run rehab center. This is a story of unconditional love, addiction, redemption, and forgiveness. And most importantly, God’s gift of desperation he received.