Adventure Fantasy Humor

Enter into the salaciously sexy world of “environmental espionage” and meet Jayms Blonde. He’s gorgeous, gay, and makes the bad guys pay! A hairdresser by trade and a secret agent by choice, this former US Navy Seal can handle an Uzi like a teasing comb.

Rosa and Eddie are among hundreds of teens applying to NASA's mysterious Interworlds Agency. They're not exactly sure what the top-secret program entails, but they know they want in. Even if they are selected, they have no idea what lies in store. But first they have to make it through round after round of crazy-competitive testing. And then something happens that even NASA's scientists couldn't predict....

Lex, a teenage Grim Reaper, has the power to damn souls - and it’s getting out of control. Her boyfriend, Driggs, is dead - sort of. She’s a fugitive, on the run from the maniacal new mayor of Croak and the townspeople who want to see her pay the price for her misdeeds. Uncle Mort rounds up the Junior Grims to flee Croak once again, but this time they’re joined by Grotton, the most powerful Grim of all time. Their new mission is clear: Fix his mistakes, or the Afterlife will cease to exist, along with all the souls in it.

Princess Wisdom, known as Dizzy, longs for a life of excitement beyond the staid old kingdom of Montagne. Tips, a soldier, longs to keep his true identity a secret. Fortitude, an orphaned maid, longs only for Tips. These three souls might possibly attain their dreams while preserving their empire from ruin - if only they can bear one another’s company long enough to devise a plan. Romance and adventure join forces in this hilarious tale told in diaries, letters, an encyclopedia, and even a play, all seamlessly stitched together by Catherine Gilbert Murdock.

Imagine you’re the Pandora of myth and legend. The Greek chick with the box. Now imagine it’s your duty (and your curse) to gather up all the evil you set free and put it where it belongs - back into the box you were tricked into opening all those millennia ago. Add to the mix the world’s first rock star, an immortal villainess with a kink for poisons, and a management shakeup in the Underworld. Now imagine your box has been stolen.

Thirteen years ago Oliver's father died in a battle against Red Line, the nasty dragon that plagued Aardland. Oliver has since grown into a very large man with little ambition, earning him a new name: The Lump. When Flynn, a glory seeking adventurer, and Meena, a mysterious foreign girl, arrive with news that Red Line has stirred once again, the Lump finds himself reluctantly embroiled in a quest to defeat the dragon.

Staring down at the culmination of his life's work, Professor Norman Rumble is horrified and unable to comprehend what has happened... How could he have known? The hilarious sequel to the Siam Storm adventure. This time, Stu and Spock team up with Pon to recover the once-again stolen holy relic, though this time it's disappeared for an even stranger and more astonishing reason.

Barry's been patient, but after 27 years of trimming hedges for people he hates, he's had enough. All he wants to do is to find his missing father and to discover his inner ninja. But life’s not done with throwing him curveballs. With talking hedges, samurai ghosts, meddling psychotherapists, and an inexplicably non-linear time pattern conspiring against him, Barry must do battle to unleash the ninja within and rescue his father from an ancient army, a dark sorcerer, and a raging inferno.

Something very strange is going on in Bowling Green, Kentucky. A masked terrorist attacks a local politician and a news reporter at a minor league baseball game. A Gay Pride parade is bombed. A veteran's home is invaded and taken over by new ownership, and every resident that is not Caucasian has suddenly...disappeared.

It's crass gun porn filled with fanboy pandering action movie references. Do you like action movies? Do you like dark, edgy, hard-boiled heroes? Do you like fully automatic weapons blasting guys' heads off? How about product endorsements that are awkwardly placed between depictions of intense violence? Yeah? Then this book is for you!

Horror, Humor, and Heroes is a collection of twelve short stories, one novella, and a preview for my next novel that should contain enough variety to entertain you readers. Sample some of my finest offerings, such as - a guardian wolf fearing the coming of man, a producer willing to do anything to bring the first pay per view live werewolf hunt to the world, and a zombie running for congress.

Kilroy Dondi Vance is an 18-year-old mixed-race Brooklynite who deals pot and goes to prep school on scholarship, all while growing up in the shadow of his absentee father, Billy Rage, a legendary graffiti writer who disappeared from New York City in 1989 following a public feud with MTA police chief Anastacio Bracken. Now it’s 2005. Bracken is running for mayor of New York City. And who should Dondi discover on a rooftop in Brooklyn but his father, newly returned to the city and ready to settle the score.

A half-woman, half-cockroach fused in a bizarre gardening accident? That would be Mrs Jittery Twitch, dwelling in the shadows of our misdeeds. If in danger, you can call upon her help...all she asks is your soul as payment. But she’s just a legend, so no need to worry. Barry Harris is a 28-year-old man, still living with his dear old mum in a little flat above a hairdresser. His obsession with Star Trek and the martial arts won’t help him when he’s forced out on a date. And nobody knows about the weird string of events that’s about to put everyone’s lives in danger.

Sometimes it feels like Oddonis can’t do anything right. Especially compared to his literally perfect twin brother, Adonis. But this time, Oddonis has really messed up by accidentally turning his father, the all-powerful king of the gods, Zeus, into a giant baby. Now, it’s up to Oddonis to assemble a team of his odd friends - Mathena, Gaseous, and Puneous - and journey to the underworld to get the curse reversed. Along the way, Oddonis will have to overcome a series of dangerous obstacles, his obnoxious brother, his own self-doubt, and the horrible scents of his best friend.

This paranormal adventure follows a young adventure-seeker and a curmudgeonly ghost bound together in a combative partnership that escalates to the comedic breaking point. Only by reconciling their differences are they able to defeat destructive forces working against them, and uncover the profound connections that weave their fates together.

Krample is the self-proclaimed evil CEO of Krample Co, a well-renowned toy company in the Jolian system. Each year, Krample sets out on a quest to thwart Galactic Claus and become the official toy provider for Galaxmas. With an increasingly disgruntled board of directors, Krample must take drastic measures to secure the future of his company and defeat Galactic Claus once and for all. Join Krample, his trusted advisor and cookie-baking expert, a hot Kolithian secretary, and a pepperoni/AI framework expert as they set out on a not-so-epic Galaxmas quest.

Every cheap little barbarian movie deserves a sequel. But abiding by the laws of straight-to-video sword and sorcery, the sequel doesn’t always continue the story. They’re crazier, funny, and often far removed from the mythology laid down by the film which preceded them. So, in keeping with this formula comes Sword Dude 2. The continuing adventures of the hero also known as the Dude of Swords. He’s back, by popular demand, fighting, killing, playing it cool, and saving the girl in this phantasmagoric romp into realms fantastic.

This audiobook is intended for children of all ages. It is set in 1959, but in a parallel universe, starring Albert, an eternally youthful 77-year-old, and his 7-year-old best friend, Wilber. Join them on their many surreal adventures as Albert seeks to cling onto his youth and find the answer of a lifetime. Three wild days in Albert's world full of imaginative scenery and quirky characters, combined with plenty of good old-fashioned 1950's boyhood charm, will leave you wondering what could possibly happen next.

The Wonderful World of Linus Bailey existed, until recently, entirely within Linus' head. That was okay until the morning of his tenth birthday, when it all came true. Welsh coal miners singing in the garden, a camel, a headmaster who turned evil and a school that became a castle, these all became the backdrop to the much bigger question: Would Nigel Bailey, his Yorkshire Ninja dad arrive in time for his birthday, or would Linus be trapped down a mine for ever? Immerse yourself in the mind of a ten-year-old British schoolboy as he learns to cope with a brand new world.

The time? Tomorrow. Can the president of the United Red States of America and the president of the United Blue States of America come together to stop a giant asteroid before it destroys Earth in one month's time? Who is the mysterious Doctor Apophis? What is the "S.U.R.", and why is the president of the USA determined to defend it at all costs? What the hell is the Canadian army doing in North Dakota, and why does HRH Queen Kate of England want to wage war with the USA? And what is...The Myoshi Effect?