Dark Comedy Horror Fiction

Road Kills is a collection of short tales of dark comic horror from the mind of Isaac Thorne. These stories are all connected to travel, to the road. After all, it is always lurking there, quiet and dark, just waiting for you to come out for a drive or a walk or a jog.

Do you love horror stories? The type of stories that you read to your children to warn them about the horrors of the night? Are you a newcomer to the genre, or are you a veteran that has already went through the raunchiest most devastating stories out there already? Well then, this is the perfect midnight “snack” for you.

There is a general belief that books give a wider room for imaginations - even wider than the room that watching a movie affords you, and truthfully so. These tales, when listened to in the dark, will leave you with much to imagine - an arm covered in goose bumps and the back of your neck with all the hackles on their ends. The curtains you see might not be curtains. The mirrors, too, might become home to many faces and the old man by the road might not be what you think he is. Welcome to the home of scary and macabre tales.

A new dark comedy series by the creator of DeathCreator! Shtulls had fought a bloody war for the human kingdom despite not being one himself. He watched his men die and struggled on until he beat the demonic emperor and returned home a hero. But on the eve of his medal ceremony, he encountered a being that changed his life for better or worse. Now he is cursed, poor, homeless, and without mana. His curse forces him to say or do whatever he thinks is the worst thing possible and has robbed him of his honor and dignity.

"Ibid" is a parody by American horror fiction writer H. P. Lovecraft. Ibid is a mock biography of the Roman scholar Ibidus (486-587), whose masterpiece was Op. Cit., "wherein all the significant undercurrents of Graeco-Roman thought were crystallized once and for all." The piece traces the skull of Ibidus, once the possession of Charlemagne, William the Conqueror and other notables, to the United States, where it travels via Salem, Massachusetts and Providence, Rhode Island to a prairie dog hole in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

The cornerstone of private investigation—insurance fraud. Doing it, obviously. And then there’s the taxi job. Run someone to the airport while being chased by who knows what? Mix that in with drugs, party boats, and the Virgin Mary, and you’ve got a pretty standard day for one Mr. Cole. All for a lousy paycheck. Full of infanticide, evisceration, sadists, and snuff, Alex Cole is part private detective, part mercenary...all sick f--k. Cole Investigations is open—once more—for business.

Sharing a beer with Death - one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse - really put a few things into perspective for this foul-mouthed, billionaire wizard. Like finally getting the stones to propose to his girlfriend. But the Brothers Grimm - legendary supernatural assassins - have escaped their prison, and the number one thing they want after their centuries-long incarceration is Nate Temple’s head. With the entire wedding party also on their hit list and the Temple family fortune in jeopardy, Nate realizes they can’t run and they can’t hide. So, time to do magic and stuff.

The ancient pact between mankind, heaven, and hell has been broken, and Nate Temple’s quest for vengeance may have just kicked off Armageddon. So, time to grab a stiff drink…or maybe four. Already plagued with night terrors that could qualify him as a card-carrying insomniac, Nate can barely even manage to put on his pants in the morning, let alone pick teams for the Apocalypse. But when he’s framed as a demon sympathizer, condemned by the Armies of Heaven, and hunted down by both his allies and the Four Horsemen, this wizard doesn’t think it can get any worse.

Yancy Lazarus is having a bad day: there's a bullet lodged in his butt cheek, his face looks like the site of a demolition derby, and he's been saran-wrapped to a banquet table. He never should have answered the phone. Stupid bleeding heart - helping others in his circles is a good way to die - just ask the gang members ripped to pieces by some kind of demonic nightmare in LA.

Grace is canvasing for the Green Party. Ugh. Knocking on doors in a clearly conservative road. The first house is a bust, and when the second offers a kindly gent looking for assistance–she can do nothing but offer to help.

The family that decays together, stays together. On a hot summer weekend in San Antonio, Texas, a father and son bond after discovering three impossible corpses buried in their backyard. From the author and screenwriter of We Need to Do Something comes a new novel of body horror and existential crises.

The Storeroom Guys is a darkly comic listen for a foggy winter's night. It is a great piece of literature to get a conversation started about strange work colleagues, haunted spaces, post-traumatic stress, and surviving tough times. It has inspired graphic artists, theatre producers, and screen writers. For horror fans, there are lots of clever references to classics of the genre, but there is nothing jaded about the plot, and the twist is as satisfying as it is unexpected. The Guys has contemporary characters - but evil is timeless.

The Holy Bible, according to Matt Shaw. Taking the popular stories from the Bible and giving them a horror twist, this book is not intended to be used as a way of preaching your beliefs. God would probably frown down upon such usage, but if you wanted to put your feet up and chuckle along with some dark humor, then God would surely approve. For fans of the original book, this isn't for you. You won't like this. Don't listen to it. Don't be mad at me for writing it, though because, if you think about it, I am still getting the important stories out there. Kind of.

Jaunty the Clown just wants to entertain families with lighthearted slapstick antics, but people think of clowns as terrifying, nightmarish creatures who hide in closets or under beds. When Jaunty, along with his fellow performers, are fired from the circus, they're told that the world just doesn't like clowns anymore. Still, clowns have to eat. And since these clowns don't eat children, to make ends meet they're eventually forced to take a job in a popular haunted attraction, the Mountain of Terror. But millions of oversized spiders are about to invade....

A Mosca, in un afoso pomeriggio di primavera, due letterati stanno elencando le prove dell'inesistenza di Dio. Lo straniero che si intromette nella discussione è di tutt'altro parere. Non solo, ma è stato presente al processo di Gesù. Si tratta infatti del Diavolo, nei panni del mago Woland, e la sua spettacolare comparsa getterà nel caos il burocratismo sovietico e l'élite letteraria del tempo. Satira devastante e fantastica, il romanzo, in parte ambientato nella capitale sovietica e in parte nell'antica Gerusalemme, è uno dei massimi capolavori della letteratura.

Frannie Rosen's psychic mentions a brilliant future, but she never tells the relatively straight-laced and naive Frannie that she will be possessed by a promiscuous, stage-struck doppelganger. All Frannie wants is an Oscar-winning role, a “to die for” role. What she gets is far more than that, especially when she's cast in a horror film about a demonic possession, directed by the legendary Victor Madison. While being piloted by Madison, Frannie is also orchestrated by a doppelganger/demon.

Paulie Galamb is the hapless hero of this story, no matter if he likes it or not. The unattractive, unassuming divorcee was good at his job as a taste-tester of lab-grown meats, until his body turned against him.

The house on Curmudgeon Avenue should be happy now—the nincompoop residents have all met their sorry ends. But they haven't quite left...now that a new family move in, can the house find peace? Or are the ghosts of Curmudgeon Avenue going to interfere with the goings-on, romance, and dramas that new residents bring? Gordon and Zandra Bennett, along with their lovelorn daughter, Krystina, move all the way from London to Curmudgeon Avenue. Zandra has her heart set on renovating the four-story Victorian terrace and hires Harry to rip out the old and bring in the new.

For one young man, it is always decided by a simple code of chance taught to him by his mentor, a gruff truck driver named Petty who once took him under his wing. Now a trucker himself, the savant travels the quickest routes coast to coast through 1990s America, listening to the Top 40 Countdown and holding the fate of those he encounters in the palm of his hand.

Here I am, Charlie f--king Whitman - still pissed from last night, driving a rental car with two retarded kids in the back, somewhere between Barcelona and Paris. I used to be an art dealer. I suppose I still am, but now I do bad things for good money. Everything has its price, and I think I've just found mine.