Epic Fantasy Humor

This is a collection of the second six short stories in the Caverns and Creatures series.

In Xanth, everyone has a talent. But that doesn't mean everyone loves his talent, and no one understands that better than Hapless. Endowed with the ability to conjure any instrument he wants, Hapless could be an extraordinary musician if only he could play a tune that didn't fall ear-piercingly flat. His one desire is to find an instrument he can play. When the Good Magician hears about Hapless's desperate desire, he sends the young man on a quest to find the elusive Isis Orb, a magical talisman that could fulfill his wish.

There's a war brewing between high-level factions, a conflict Eve finds herself caught in the middle of. Soon enough, this secret plot, this life quest, this entire broken trilogy will come hurtling to an end. Perhaps, with any luck, there will be a loaf of bread waiting on the other side. Or maybe the real loaf of bread was the friends we made along the way. Those friends that made it through, that is.

The adventure continues. Tim and the C and C gang face their most difficult challenges yet. Horses die. Eyeballs are eaten. People are urinated on. A god is born.

Harry Flashman: the unrepentant bully of Tom Brown's schooldays, now with a Victoria Cross, has three main talents - horsemanship, facility with foreign languages, and fornication. A reluctant military hero, Flashman plays a key part in most of the defining military campaigns of the 19th century, despite trying his utmost to escape them all. What was Harry Flashman doing on the slopes of Little Bighorn, caught between the gallant remnant of Custer's 7th Cavalry and the attack of Sitting Bull's braves?

Being the Dark Lord and Prince of Evil is not as much fun as it sounds, particularly if you are a basically decent person. King Mordak is just such a person. Technically he's more goblin than person, but the point is that he is really keen to be a lot less despicable than his predecessors. Not that the other goblins appreciate Mordak's attempts to redefine the role. Why should they when his new healthcare program seems designed to actually extend life expectancy, and his efforts to end a perfectly reasonable war with the dwarves appear to have become an obsession?

Waldo and company arrive looking for information. What they find is a suspicious mage guild, a delusional queen, an entire city awash in greed and deception, and an old acquaintance who is very happy to see him again. Getting the information he's looking for won't be easy, but when has that ever stopped Waldo?

Going back home was not exactly what Tim and the C&C gang expected. Trouble continues to follow them back to Gulf Coast Mississippi. Trouble...and a gnome...and an undead midget.

Piers Anthony delivers another tale set in the best-selling world of Xanth, filled with magic, surprises, adventure, and a few puns. Here's what the author has to say about his new book: "Five Portraits is a kind of sequel to Board Stiff in that it picks up where the other leaves off, with the same characters. Apart from that, it's one of my favorites within the series.

Hi, how are you? Yes, I am talking to you, the reader of this book's description. Okay, I get it, fourth-wall breaking is overdone. Get over it. This book, Villains Rule, is a fantasy action-comedy which you have to hear. Not because it redefines the genre, far from it. But rather for what it contains. A villain's tale. How often do you get to listen to a story where the villain is the protagonist? No, not an anti-hero, or a brooding monster, nor a hero thinly disguised as a villain. And not evil. If you want evil, take that nonsense to therapy.

Living in a virtual game world sounds like the ultimate dream. Plenty of action, intrigue, and guess who gets to be the big hero? But what happens when that digital reality gets flipped on its head? Bad guys are after your sweet loot, your fancy title is loaded with unrealistic expectations, and achieving such a high level comes with a big fat target on your back. Something has to give, so when a new crusader faction rolls into town, Talon senses an opportunity.

Waldo's on the run again. He escapes Melissa's grasp but is marked by her Death Seal. What is there to do but keep going forward? Follow Waldo, Alice, and Gronk as they deal with spies, smugglers, and giant monsters. Meanwhile, Melissa has problems of her own back in Torikai. While in the land of Dark Mages, Lilith begins putting her plans into action. Waldo finds himself in a port city with no one willing to take him and his party where he needs to go. Just what will he have to do to get passage? If you're desperate enough, you can always find someone willing to make a deal.

En su decimotercer cumpleaños, el huérfano Alcatraz Smedry recibe un curioso paquete: una bolsa de arena, herencia de sus padres, que han desaparecido.

La bolsa es robada de inmediato, y entonces Alcatraz comprende que no se trata de una arena cualquiera. Con ella, los Bibliotecarios Malvados que controlan en secreto algunos de los países más poderosos del mundo podrán controlar también algunos de los Reinos Libres.

Veranix Calbert leads a double life. By day, he’s a struggling magic student at the University of Maradaine. At night, he spoils the drug trade of Willem Fenmere, crime boss of Dentonhill and murderer of Veranix’s father. He’s determined to shut Fenmere down. With that goal in mind, Veranix disrupts the delivery of two magical artifacts meant for Fenmere's clients, the mages of the Blue Hand Circle. Using these power-filled objects in his fight, he quickly becomes a real thorn in Fenmere's side.

Apropos is a rogue, a rascal, a scoundrel, a cheat...and those are his good points. Lame of leg but fast of wit, the only reason Apropos doesn't consider chivalry dead is because he's not yet through with it. An orphan with a chip on his shoulder, Apropos, travels to the court of the good King Runcible, with three goals in mind: to find his father, seek retribution for the death of his mother, and to line his own pockets. However, Apropos carries the most troublesome burden a would-be harbinger of chaos can bear: He may well be a hero foretold, a young man of destiny.

In the spirit of Flashman, and in the inimitable George MacDonald Fraser style, comes a rousing story of prize fighting in the 19th century. Reissued in a stunning new package, Black Ajax will attract a new generation of fans. When Captain Buck Flashman sees the black boxer catch a fly in midflight, he realizes that he is in the presence of speed such as the prize ring has never seen.

R. K. Billiau presents book three in the PrimeVerse series.

Self-proclaimed conqueror Auroro and his contracted guide, Rynissie, have hit the road. They have had a simple errand (read: most important task) entrusted to them and are heading to the cave-elf city of Cerulean-in-the-Mountain.... Or at least that was the plan. Auroro has decided to be efficient. They're going to do some jobs along the way and make some money! Sounds simple enough, right? Unfortunately, things are not normal in the forests of Viridia.

Gerald Dunwoody is a wizard. Just not a particularly good one. He's blown up a factory, lost his job, and there's a chance that he's not really a Third Grade wizard after all. So it's off to New Ottosland to be the new Court Wizard for King Lional. It's a shame that King Lional isn't the vain, self-centered young man he appeared to be. With a princess in danger, a talking bird who can't stay out of trouble, and a kingdom to save, Gerald soon suspects that he might be out of his depth.

Sharing a beer with Death - one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse - really put a few things into perspective for this foul-mouthed, billionaire wizard. Like finally getting the stones to propose to his girlfriend. But the Brothers Grimm - legendary supernatural assassins - have escaped their prison, and the number one thing they want after their centuries-long incarceration is Nate Temple’s head. With the entire wedding party also on their hit list and the Temple family fortune in jeopardy, Nate realizes they can’t run and they can’t hide. So, time to do magic and stuff.