Funny Science Fiction Fantasy

Bingo Grabbins is a soddit who enjoys a comfortable life (apart from his feet, of course). But his contentment is disturbed when the wizard, Gandef, and a company of bizarrely Welsh dwarves drag him away on an adventure. They have a plot to raid the treasure hoard (or so they say) guarded by Smug, a large and very tedious dragon. Bingo is reluctant to take part in this insane venture, but a dwarven dagger held to his throat soon surprises even himself and off the companions go on a quest that seems truly epic.

While Kelly struggles to come up with a research project to apply for sabbatical, the role-playing craze reaches Union Station, and the Open University offers a for-credit LARP. Dorothy finally finishes her wedding dress with a technical flourish, and Jeeves plots to recoup his costs.

Ten-year-old Opie Jones is Very Ordinary. In fact nothing remarkable has ever happened to her, if you don’t count the cat that gives her funny looks from next door (which she doesn’t). So she is naturally very surprised when she is recruited to join The Resistance—a team of superheroes who can read minds, and have a dastardly brainwashing villain to defeat. However it turns out Opie can’t read human minds; she can read animal ones. The other members of the Resistance are very disappointed. And a whole world of animal chat and demands is opening up to her.

Percy Jackson fans will embrace this humorous time travel adventure, the first in a series, about an iPhone malfunction that sends three kids back to 1776 in time to rescue George Washington. On Christmas Day, Mel finds General George Washington lying dead as a doornail in a stable. But Mel knows that George Washington must cross the Delaware River, or the course of American history will be changed forever. Could Mel’s iPhone have sent him back in time to 1776? And can Mel and his schoolmates, know-it-all Bev and laid-back Brandon, come to the rescue?

Math-genius mercenary Cas Russell has decided to Fight Crime(tm). After all, with her extraordinary mathematical ability, she can neuter bombs or out-shoot an army. And the recent outbreak of violence in the world’s cities is Cas’s fault—she’s the one who crushed the organization of telepaths keeping the world’s worst offenders under control. But Cas’s own power also has a history, one she can’t remember—or control.

Monty Python meets Gladiator! Sand is destined for greatness...or so a pair of two-bit criminals would have him believe. After rescuing him from certain doom, Bess and Kaede embark on a scheme to game the War God Tournament. It’d be easier if Sand wasn’t an alcohol-soaked twit with a disturbing interest in mutton. Pitted against monsters, magic swords, and murderers galore, they soon realize winning the tourney is the least of their worries.

When a furry, four-legged beast from the distant past appears in their park, the local animals are concerned about unwanted attention from humans. Gilly the Possum, assistant to raccoon Mayor Crawdaddy, is tasked with figuring out where the lost galumpus came from . . . and how to get him home again. While Gilly and the Mayor don’t agree on much, they can agree on one thing: with a huge blizzard rolling in, the galumpus needs their help, no matter where he came from.

Stargazey World follows the story of Sheena Robinson, a feisty, complex youngster who often feels guilty about her lack of concentration. At school her work doesn't improve and her chaotic mop of tangled green hair is mocked, but this feisty Scouser has the ready wit and true grit to deal with her bullies. When Sheena visits Cornwall for her cousin's wedding, she must share a bedroom with the tomboyish Carys. By day everything is normal, but by night the animals on the bedroom wallpaper come to life.

Keep your head down. Don't make waves. Don't let anyone know you're a freak. Larissa Alvarez is a witch. Magic was useful enough to make her pretty, but beyond transformation runes, Larissa has ignored her mom's pleas to learn about her magical heritage on the grounds that it's just too weird. But when her family is killed, and the powerful book of runes Larissa was supposed to inherit disappears, she realizes she's not going to survive without magic. Worse still, she's falling in love with her only ally, her best friend Joe, who has a secret that could kill them both.

When his friends aren’t successful at spooking the children who visit the haunted house, Gus must present his unique superpowers to give them a scare!

Fairy is a unicorn. Now, that’s not so strange. But her powerful farts, please avoid at close range. Her farts are a burst of pink rainbow dust. But run away fast, if she lets one bust. Share this farting tale with loved ones. Adults are permitted to laugh, too.

In book 4 there’s the librarian, of course, all the main characters from books 1-3, including the town of Eden which is certainly a main character, and a witch. It begins with her asking the librarian to find her Familiar, a cat. It ends with, well, I can’t tell you that. Expect suspense and unexpected twists and turns, odd characters, and the same kind of humor that is in the other novels because I’m pretty much unable to have any other kind. Hope you enjoy it.

Book 6: the librarian of the supernatural town of Eden faces his greatest challenge yet when a powerful being abducts residents in what turns out to be an act of revenge. With the help of his hellhound companion, Fluffy, and his allies (the ghostbusters, the witch Olive, and the werewolf) Rip Van Winkle, Kevin must confront the monster and prevent it from exacting its revenge on Eden. Meanwhile, Kevin grapples with his own destiny as the anti-Christ and the looming threat of Armageddon.

The Unidentified Funny Objects series delivers an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices!

Kevin Austin has no plans of staying in the strange mountain town of Eden when he ends up becoming the new librarian after the previous one is murdered. He soon realizes this is no ordinary library. The books actually talk and fly around the rooms, and there's a ghost haunting the premises. Not to mention a collection of dangerous magical artifacts in the basement. In the town of Eden, Kevin encounters witches, zombies, demons, talking crows, angels, even gods and goddesses. Everyone in town seems to have secrets, including the alluring Olive, who Kevin falls for in book 1.

Alex has a crush on the new teacher’s assistant, and he’s finally worked up the nerve to approach her. Too bad she’s crossed the University’s star player, and Duncan Shaw has no choice but to make her disappear. He plans to lay the blame on the local urban legend, but tonight he just might learn that some legends are real.

After an altercation with a clown, I get lost in the woods and find a strange town. When the librarian of the town dies in front of me, I try on his ring. It fits. I’m declared the new librarian by the mayor and townspeople. I get to live in a houseful of books. But I soon learn the job involves more than just tomes and information. In this second novel in the series, a library book goes missing. Not just any book but the true story of what happened in Eden, among other true stories certain humans and angels don't want told. I have to find this book.

When Heidi finds out about a magical wishing well at her school, she’s amazed and delighted—even though students are forbidden to use it. Then, an important exam is scheduled at the very same time her crush invites her on a nature walk, and Heidi needs a magical assist. Usually, she tries to follow the rules—really!—but she decides to use the well to wish to be in two places at once. What could go wrong?

Tutto d`un tratto, Heng Lee comincia a sentirsi molto strano, così decide di far visita allo Sciamano locale, niente meno che sua zia. Dopo alcuni test conclude che Heng non ha più sangue nel corpo. Come lo dirà alla sua famiglia? E cosa decideranno di fare? Heng Lee è un capraio delle remote montagne a nord-est di Chiang Rai, nel nord della Thailandia, vicino al confine con il Laos.

It’s all fun and games at the circus...until everyone’s favorite clown winds up dead. Someone killed Clint the Clown. Madam Electra’s crystal ball could help find the murderer, but she risks exposing her own secrets in the process. Secrets that could land her on the endangered species list. Head security officer Bruno Maska has been ordered to enlist the help of the one person he suspects is hiding something - Electra. The same woman who’s been haunting his thoughts since their drunken night together.