Funny Science Fiction Fantasy

The Stryx offer EarthCent help in reaching out to the wide-spread human communities, but as usual, it comes with a catch or two. Kelly see an opportunity to increase her book hoard, just as publishing on Union Station begins to take off and Donna's daughters enter a friendly competition. But who will publish the most expensive book of all?

A new species has jumped into the Sol system for a quick look, leading the Stryx to assign humans to the greeting mission. Dorothy and Kevin leave on a trading mission in his new ship, bringing the dog, and Samuel and Vivian start at the Open University.

Bingo Grabbins is a soddit who enjoys a comfortable life (apart from his feet, of course). But his contentment is disturbed when the wizard, Gandef, and a company of bizarrely Welsh dwarves drag him away on an adventure. They have a plot to raid the treasure hoard (or so they say) guarded by Smug, a large and very tedious dragon. Bingo is reluctant to take part in this insane venture, but a dwarven dagger held to his throat soon surprises even himself and off the companions go on a quest that seems truly epic.

Ten-year-old Opie Jones is Very Ordinary. In fact nothing remarkable has ever happened to her, if you don’t count the cat that gives her funny looks from next door (which she doesn’t). So she is naturally very surprised when she is recruited to join The Resistance—a team of superheroes who can read minds, and have a dastardly brainwashing villain to defeat. However it turns out Opie can’t read human minds; she can read animal ones. The other members of the Resistance are very disappointed. And a whole world of animal chat and demands is opening up to her.

Percy Jackson fans will embrace this humorous time travel adventure, the first in a series, about an iPhone malfunction that sends three kids back to 1776 in time to rescue George Washington. On Christmas Day, Mel finds General George Washington lying dead as a doornail in a stable. But Mel knows that George Washington must cross the Delaware River, or the course of American history will be changed forever. Could Mel’s iPhone have sent him back in time to 1776? And can Mel and his schoolmates, know-it-all Bev and laid-back Brandon, come to the rescue?

Monty Python meets Gladiator! Sand is destined for greatness...or so a pair of two-bit criminals would have him believe. After rescuing him from certain doom, Bess and Kaede embark on a scheme to game the War God Tournament. It’d be easier if Sand wasn’t an alcohol-soaked twit with a disturbing interest in mutton. Pitted against monsters, magic swords, and murderers galore, they soon realize winning the tourney is the least of their worries.

When a furry, four-legged beast from the distant past appears in their park, the local animals are concerned about unwanted attention from humans. Gilly the Possum, assistant to raccoon Mayor Crawdaddy, is tasked with figuring out where the lost galumpus came from . . . and how to get him home again. While Gilly and the Mayor don’t agree on much, they can agree on one thing: with a huge blizzard rolling in, the galumpus needs their help, no matter where he came from.

Stargazey World follows the story of Sheena Robinson, a feisty, complex youngster who often feels guilty about her lack of concentration. At school her work doesn't improve and her chaotic mop of tangled green hair is mocked, but this feisty Scouser has the ready wit and true grit to deal with her bullies. When Sheena visits Cornwall for her cousin's wedding, she must share a bedroom with the tomboyish Carys. By day everything is normal, but by night the animals on the bedroom wallpaper come to life.

When his friends aren’t successful at spooking the children who visit the haunted house, Gus must present his unique superpowers to give them a scare!

Fairy is a unicorn. Now, that’s not so strange. But her powerful farts, please avoid at close range. Her farts are a burst of pink rainbow dust. But run away fast, if she lets one bust. Share this farting tale with loved ones. Adults are permitted to laugh, too.

In book 4 there’s the librarian, of course, all the main characters from books 1-3, including the town of Eden which is certainly a main character, and a witch. It begins with her asking the librarian to find her Familiar, a cat. It ends with, well, I can’t tell you that. Expect suspense and unexpected twists and turns, odd characters, and the same kind of humor that is in the other novels because I’m pretty much unable to have any other kind. Hope you enjoy it.

Book 6: the librarian of the supernatural town of Eden faces his greatest challenge yet when a powerful being abducts residents in what turns out to be an act of revenge. With the help of his hellhound companion, Fluffy, and his allies (the ghostbusters, the witch Olive, and the werewolf) Rip Van Winkle, Kevin must confront the monster and prevent it from exacting its revenge on Eden. Meanwhile, Kevin grapples with his own destiny as the anti-Christ and the looming threat of Armageddon.

The Unidentified Funny Objects series delivers an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices!

Alex has a crush on the new teacher’s assistant, and he’s finally worked up the nerve to approach her. Too bad she’s crossed the University’s star player, and Duncan Shaw has no choice but to make her disappear. He plans to lay the blame on the local urban legend, but tonight he just might learn that some legends are real.

After an altercation with a clown, I get lost in the woods and find a strange town. When the librarian of the town dies in front of me, I try on his ring. It fits. I’m declared the new librarian by the mayor and townspeople. I get to live in a houseful of books. But I soon learn the job involves more than just tomes and information. In this second novel in the series, a library book goes missing. Not just any book but the true story of what happened in Eden, among other true stories certain humans and angels don't want told. I have to find this book.

It’s all fun and games at the circus...until everyone’s favorite clown winds up dead. Someone killed Clint the Clown. Madam Electra’s crystal ball could help find the murderer, but she risks exposing her own secrets in the process. Secrets that could land her on the endangered species list. Head security officer Bruno Maska has been ordered to enlist the help of the one person he suspects is hiding something - Electra. The same woman who’s been haunting his thoughts since their drunken night together.

It's the 25th century, and the American President has taken over the world. Meanwhile, after a cleaner unplugged his cryogenic freezing machine by accident, Detective Inspector Capstan wakes up to find that he's been in a state of suspended animation for more than 400 years. As he's forced to adjust to life in the future, he finds himself reinstated as a policeman, and together with the great-great-great-great-grandson of his former subordinate, Sergeant Dewbush, he's put on the case of a missing cow.

Mum and Dad have left—gone to Mars, and they’re never coming back. Freedom at last! But this isn’t one of Dad’s weird jokes; it’s REAL. It’s up to 10-year-old Eliza and her genius little brother, Johnnie, to find out what’s going on, and launch a rescue. Can they handle vampire squids, a suspicious villain, a secret island full of traps and a trip into space? And—more importantly—will they ever get their parents back?

Have you ever wondered what a UFO abduction is like from the alien’s viewpoint? Can a machine provide comfort to a dying woman? What would it be like to fall into the hands of a get-rich-quick scheming extraterrestrial? All these questions and more are answered in this book of wonderfully crafted short stories by breakout author J.J. Harlan.

Drusinella is a fairy with attitude. Banished from Fairy Land, because she has the nasty habit of turning princes into frogs with no way to change them back, she now has to live without wings as a punishment. A stupid princess, Camria, saves Drusinella from fairy hunters, which by fairy law means she must grant her deepest wish. It is, of course, the one thing Drusinella hates more than princes: true love. Now the two go on an adventure to find the prince of Camria’s dreams (who, in all likelihood, has been turned into a frog by Drusinella).