Funny Science

You may know Jimmy Failla as the best dressed man in cable news. A force multiplier of positive energy on the radio who sounds like he gets paid in Tequila and Tide Pods. But he’s also a former New York City Taxi Driver who’s spent countless hours conversing with people from all over this planet and several planets you’ve never heard of. It’s those chats with hobbits, hookers, and time travelers that fill The Cancel Culture Dictionary with the unique perspective and savage self-awareness we need to escape the outrage era society is stuck in.

Once upon a time, there was a king and queen in a land called Love's Keep who once loved one another, but alas, no more. Without love, they were doomed to be ousted from their kingdom at the end of a year and a day. A year and a day passed. This is where their story starts. Imelda and Ambrose can't remember why they got married. A year and a day ago, Ambrose consulted a witch, trading their love to save Imelda's life - and they've been stuck with one another ever since.

Risk-averse Greg Belmont is content with being ordinary. He's got a friend - that's right, just one - at his fancy prep school, and a pretty cool dad (even if he is obsessed with organic soaps that smell like a mix of salted pork and Icelandic bog). The problem is, Greg isn't ordinary... he's actually a fantastical Dwarf! He discovers the truth the day his dad brings home a gross new tea - one that awakens bizarre abilities in Greg. Then a murderous Bro-Troll kidnaps his dad and Greg is whisked away to the Underground, where Dwarves have lived for centuries right beneath Chicago.

The Lilac. The bard songs say that she’s the world’s most fearsome bounty hunter. That there’s no criminal she can’t catch, no mystery she can’t solve. None of that is true. Yet. In reality, the Lilac is just a kid, and the bard who wrote all that is her best friend, Dulcinetta. But the Lilac has set her goals on becoming the best bounty hunter in the Thirteen Kingdoms—and when a priceless artifact goes missing from the home of famed monster hunter Baron Angbar, the Lilac and Netta are eager to apprehend the thief and make a name for themselves.

Welcome to Other Worlds, the fourth volume in the Guys Read Library. Prepare yourself for 10 trips into the unknown, as 10 of your favorite writers spin tales of fantasy and science fiction the likes of which you have never imagined. Compiled by National Ambassador for Children's Literature (and Secret Ambassador for the Intergalactic Alliance) Jon Scieszka, Guys Read: Other Worlds is the most exciting collection of stories on this - or any other - planet.

Mordak isn't bad as far as goblin kings go, but when someone - or something - starts pumping gold into the human kingdoms, it puts his rule in serious jeopardy. Suddenly he's locked in an arms race with a species whose arms he once considered merely part of a calorie-controlled diet. Helped by an elf with a background in journalism and a master's degree in being really pleased with herself, Mordak sets out to discover what on Earth (if indeed, that's where he is) is going on.

When the 13th Classroom is struck by purple lightning, something strange happens - all of the students get superpowers! You might think this was superb, but it was not. (It was sorta silly.) With great gifts comes wild weather, giant roaches, atomic farts, and other tricky troubles. As the students of Classroom 13 are about to learn, getting superpowers is not always super.

Alex is a normal, everyday kid, living in a normal, everyday city. Axel is a monster-slaying hero, living in a world of magic. Unfortunately, when the two boys mysteriously swap places, each of them ends up being mistaken for the other. With zero experience of heroism, Alex is thrust into an epic quest to defeat the evil Felonius Gloam, who has stolen the Book of Lifetales and is using it to unravel the very fabric of the world of Aërth. Meanwhile, Axel is faced with double maths, a gran who's six months behind on the rent, and a crucial chess tournament he's got to win.

Meet Mars! The red planet. Planet Marvelous. Favorite sibling of Earth (or so he claims). Sometimes they're close (just 34.5 million miles apart). Sometimes they need space (250 million miles apart)! Earth and Mars have a lot in common - clouds, mountains, polar icecaps. And while Earth has Earthlings, Mars makes a persuasive case for why people should make the journey to spend time with him. His day is seven minutes longer! He is home to the largest volcano in the whole solar system. He's, well, marvelous.

Special Agent Niki Banks has called in a favor, and now Taylor has a young hacker with an attitude as an employee. Along with new monsters to kill, a business to get off the ground, a relationship with an annoying FBI handler to...deal with, Taylor is becoming a surrogate male figure for a role he didn't want. But he may be the best man for the job.

The Cryptids have started to kill a large amount of humans in the Upper Midwest. Banks' bosses told her not to call in the Cryptid Assassin.... He's too expensive. Now, the showdown between Taylor and the creatures will stop when one or the other is dead...and it isn't looking good for Taylor.

Did you know that hamsters are only able to blink one eye at a time? Did you know the longest video game marathon ever recorded was 29 hours and 31 minutes? Did you know the earliest case of hearing loss documented in writing is from ancient Egypt in 1550 BC? In that era, people injected red lead, goat urine, olive oil, bat wings, and ant eggs in the ear canal in an attempt to cure bad hearing. In these 1,500 facts, you're going to learn more than you learned from all your high school teachers combined.

One of the best ways to turn an average camping trip or sleepover with friends into an all-out adventure is to spark your kid’s curiosity with a nail-biting and edge-of-your-seat tale of terror. Whatever the case may be, these captivating and mind-bending stories are sure to capture their attention and leave them begging for more. On top of that, all of the characters are easily relatable and will even empower your children toward a deeper understanding of some powerful moral life lessons.

On the first day of school, Artie falls out of his bed and hits his head. Hard. He tells his mom he's dizzy, and she says: "You’re just worried about your first day in a new school." On the second day of school, Artie falls out of bed and hits his head. Hard. He tells his mom he's dizzy, and she says: "You’re just worried about your first day in a new school." Huh?

For almost a decade, Richard Herring has been answering sexist trolls on International Women's Day when they ask 'when is International Men's Day?' in the mistaken belief there isn't one. If only the trolls had learned to use Google they'd realise that there is an International Men's Day - it's on November 19th. In The Problem with Men Richard expands on his Twitter discussions and tackles some of the big questions surrounding the problems of toxic masculinity - for women, but also for men.

The fate of the world lies with one man: Bip Plunkerton. Talentless scientist and frequent drinker at the Empty Goat, young Bip Plunkerton will follow in his father’s footsteps as a volunteer...footsteps that have yet to return from the wilds of the wide world outside.

In Magikos, life is dictated by the Book of Fate's ancient predictions, including the birth of a royal Chosen One who will save the realm. Princess Marabel has grown up in the shadow of her twin brother, Marco, who everyone assumes is the true Chosen One. While Marco is adored and given every opportunity, Marabel is overlooked and has to practice her sword fighting in secret. But on the night of their 13th birthday, Marco is kidnapped by an evil queen, and Marabel runs to his rescue. Outside the castle walls for the first time, Marabel embarks on a daring mission.

Are you ready for the zombie apocalypse? Ever wonder what it would be like to be a real life ninja kid? Sounds like you need the ninja code! Take a peek at what is really going on with the zombie apocalypse. Michael Carter, with a handful of new friends, a dog with secret abilities, and his fart brother, need to find a safe place to hide.

Book 6: the librarian of the supernatural town of Eden faces his greatest challenge yet when a powerful being abducts residents in what turns out to be an act of revenge. With the help of his hellhound companion, Fluffy, and his allies (the ghostbusters, the witch Olive, and the werewolf) Rip Van Winkle, Kevin must confront the monster and prevent it from exacting its revenge on Eden. Meanwhile, Kevin grapples with his own destiny as the anti-Christ and the looming threat of Armageddon.

In book 4 there’s the librarian, of course, all the main characters from books 1-3, including the town of Eden which is certainly a main character, and a witch. It begins with her asking the librarian to find her Familiar, a cat. It ends with, well, I can’t tell you that. Expect suspense and unexpected twists and turns, odd characters, and the same kind of humor that is in the other novels because I’m pretty much unable to have any other kind. Hope you enjoy it.