Funny Science

The fate of the world lies with one man: Bip Plunkerton. Talentless scientist and frequent drinker at the Empty Goat, young Bip Plunkerton will follow in his father’s footsteps as a volunteer...footsteps that have yet to return from the wilds of the wide world outside.

Don’t be like Ciara, a twelve-year-old girl living in the tiny village of Skael. When she used a spell from within this book, she ended up summoning a dragon. A DRAGON! Those things breathe fire! From their mouths! She’s obviously doomed. And don’t listen if Ciara tells you that dragons won’t hurt humans, and that they even once taught us magic, a thousand years ago. Definitely don’t pay any attention to the fact that the dragon she summoned, Scorch, might be willing to help rescue Ciara’s mother and free her village from the Emperor and his Warden, because it’s all obviously a big lie.

In book 4 there’s the librarian, of course, all the main characters from books 1-3, including the town of Eden which is certainly a main character, and a witch. It begins with her asking the librarian to find her Familiar, a cat. It ends with, well, I can’t tell you that. Expect suspense and unexpected twists and turns, odd characters, and the same kind of humor that is in the other novels because I’m pretty much unable to have any other kind. Hope you enjoy it.

Book 6: the librarian of the supernatural town of Eden faces his greatest challenge yet when a powerful being abducts residents in what turns out to be an act of revenge. With the help of his hellhound companion, Fluffy, and his allies (the ghostbusters, the witch Olive, and the werewolf) Rip Van Winkle, Kevin must confront the monster and prevent it from exacting its revenge on Eden. Meanwhile, Kevin grapples with his own destiny as the anti-Christ and the looming threat of Armageddon.

Keep your head down. Don't make waves. Don't let anyone know you're a freak. Larissa Alvarez is a witch. Magic was useful enough to make her pretty, but beyond transformation runes, Larissa has ignored her mom's pleas to learn about her magical heritage on the grounds that it's just too weird. But when her family is killed, and the powerful book of runes Larissa was supposed to inherit disappears, she realizes she's not going to survive without magic. Worse still, she's falling in love with her only ally, her best friend Joe, who has a secret that could kill them both.

Step into a world where museums aren't just places to see artifacts—they're portals to extraordinary adventures! In "A Funny Thing Happened at the Museum Kids Stories Book," each chapter invites young listeners on a captivating journey through the halls of a museum, where every exhibit holds a magical surprise. From dinosaurs that seem to come to life and ancient artifacts with hidden powers, to paintings that transport you into their vibrant worlds, each story is a thrilling exploration of imagination and discovery.

One of the best ways to turn an average camping trip or sleepover with friends into an all-out adventure is to spark your kid’s curiosity with a nail-biting and edge-of-your-seat tale of terror. Whatever the case may be, these captivating and mind-bending stories are sure to capture their attention and leave them begging for more. On top of that, all of the characters are easily relatable and will even empower your children toward a deeper understanding of some powerful moral life lessons.

The Unidentified Funny Objects series serves an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices! Our sixth volume features a Mad Amos story by Alan Dean Foster, a Harry the Book tale by Mike Resnick, and an Alexander Outland short by Gini Koch.

The Unidentified Funny Objects series delivers an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices!

Have you ever wondered what a UFO abduction is like from the alien’s viewpoint? Can a machine provide comfort to a dying woman? What would it be like to fall into the hands of a get-rich-quick scheming extraterrestrial? All these questions and more are answered in this book of wonderfully crafted short stories by breakout author J.J. Harlan.

From FDR to Harry Truman to JFK to George W. Bush, A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the White House captures the wit and humor of the campaign trail - a place where levity is always welcome. Osgood includes fragments of speeches, interviews, and press conferences, as well as articles written by and about the candidates - no source is left untapped.

Ten-year-old Opie Jones is Very Ordinary. In fact nothing remarkable has ever happened to her, if you don’t count the cat that gives her funny looks from next door (which she doesn’t). So she is naturally very surprised when she is recruited to join The Resistance—a team of superheroes who can read minds, and have a dastardly brainwashing villain to defeat. However it turns out Opie can’t read human minds; she can read animal ones. The other members of the Resistance are very disappointed. And a whole world of animal chat and demands is opening up to her.

Monty Python meets Gladiator! Sand is destined for greatness...or so a pair of two-bit criminals would have him believe. After rescuing him from certain doom, Bess and Kaede embark on a scheme to game the War God Tournament. It’d be easier if Sand wasn’t an alcohol-soaked twit with a disturbing interest in mutton. Pitted against monsters, magic swords, and murderers galore, they soon realize winning the tourney is the least of their worries.

Did you know that a measles outbreak led to the assigning of phone numbers? How about the fact that pirates are the reason we don’t use the metric system in the United States? Or that there’s actually a reason why stepping on a Lego hurts so damn much? Now I Know: The Soviets Invaded Wisconsin?! is the ultimate challenge for even the biggest trivia buff. Based on the very popular newsletter, you are guaranteed to learn something new despite how much you already think you know.

Doug wasn’t sure whether he should trust Satan. The red flag was that he said he was Satan. But the deal was good: Listen to Satan’s story in exchange for some donuts. And Doug only half-fulfilled his part of the bargain. But maybe he should have listened better, because during his friend Bryce’s next scheme (theft with light to moderate treason - the usual), Doug and the rest of his friends - Lulu (the fun one) and Charlene (the not fun one) - end up with a powerful artifact, a small metal cube with world-ending power that Lulu decorated with bunnies.

These 75 flash nonfiction pieces, written by internationally celebrated women authors and dazzlingly hilarious newcomers, are no flashes in the pan: They provide a feast of insights, generously garnished with wit, spice, and an exhilarating attention to craft. In Fast Funny Women, you'll find everything you want from thoughtful essays in a short, delicious form. Perfect for students of writing, writers of humor, and all fans who welcome laughter, insight, and perspective into their lives.

When a furry, four-legged beast from the distant past appears in their park, the local animals are concerned about unwanted attention from humans. Gilly the Possum, assistant to raccoon Mayor Crawdaddy, is tasked with figuring out where the lost galumpus came from . . . and how to get him home again. While Gilly and the Mayor don’t agree on much, they can agree on one thing: with a huge blizzard rolling in, the galumpus needs their help, no matter where he came from.

Kevin Austin has no plans of staying in the strange mountain town of Eden when he ends up becoming the new librarian after the previous one is murdered. He soon realizes this is no ordinary library. The books actually talk and fly around the rooms, and there's a ghost haunting the premises. Not to mention a collection of dangerous magical artifacts in the basement. In the town of Eden, Kevin encounters witches, zombies, demons, talking crows, angels, even gods and goddesses. Everyone in town seems to have secrets, including the alluring Olive, who Kevin falls for in book 1.

When his friends aren’t successful at spooking the children who visit the haunted house, Gus must present his unique superpowers to give them a scare!

Fairy is a unicorn. Now, that’s not so strange. But her powerful farts, please avoid at close range. Her farts are a burst of pink rainbow dust. But run away fast, if she lets one bust. Share this farting tale with loved ones. Adults are permitted to laugh, too.