Grief Dying

When NPR's Scott Simon began tweeting from his mother's hospital room in July 2013, he didn't know that his missives would soon spread well beyond his 1.2 million Twitter followers. Squeezing the magnitude of his final days with her into 140-character updates, Simon's evocative and moving meditations spread virally. Over the course of a few days, Simon chronicled his mother's death and reminisced about her life, revealing her humor and strength, and celebrating familial love.

The last time Lex was happy, it was before. When she had a family that was whole. A boyfriend she loved. Friends who didn't look at her like she might break down at any moment. Now she's just the girl whose brother killed himself. And it feels like that's all she'll ever be. As Lex starts to put her life back together, she tries to block out what happened the night Tyler died. But there's a secret she hasn't told anyone--a text Tyler sent that could have changed everything.

Mourning: The Day After Loss offers practical advice and insight into the process of coping with grief and bereavement based on extensive experience and research. It leads the listener on a journey through the various stages of bereavement - from the death notification to the formal days of mourning, the burial, and the weeks and months following.

The notion of planning for one's death is intrinsically at odds with our human instinct to avoid considering our own mortality. Although we may contemplate the grief that our life's impermanence would cause to our loved ones, we seldom consider the myriad of emotional and legal issues that can arise afterward.

Evelyn Amdur, a hospice social worker, began to write these stories midway through her career, collaborating with her daughter, Shelley. Many traditional cultures have a custom of "death songs", which rest on the idea that at one's last moment, one somehow sums up the essence of one's life in a phrase or a song. Woven into these stories are instructions on how to die well, not only in what spirit we face death itself, but also through instructions on what is necessary to prepare our families, to ready our estates, and to manage all the players who may be involved in our deaths.

It's time to invite death out of the closet! The impending or actual death of someone close to you can be devastating. It doesn't matter if you knew it was coming, or if it was a total shock-you'll never be the same. There is no right way to grieve, and no appropriate time frame. It's different for everyone. Author and therapist gone rogue, Becky Aud-Jennison, the creator of The Death Dialogues Project and podcast, has sewn together threads from people's shared personal stories and her own experiences.

What happens to you when someone you love dies? Who was that person or animal companion in your life? Loss comes along. First it breaks your heart, then it stays. How do you live with loss without losing yourself? While loss comes along with you for life, grief doesn’t have to be forever. This book is about learning to live with loss and with joy every day.

See Ya Later, Ralphie explores the bond between two best friends. It is a delicate and heartwarming story that educates children on coping with the separation from loved ones, and faces their fears associated with tears and sadness. The story presents the issues of death and grieving in an inspiring way, through a combination of lighthearted humor, and uplifting revelation. See Ya Later, Ralphie delivers an unforgettable message that eases the pain of loss, and teaches children that, for the living, the journey of life keeps going, and the love we feel lasts forever.

This is a poignant tale of a special encounter that touches the heart and brings peace to the process of dying. Created from the heart by Jody Whelden, Unitarian Universalist minister, whose mission it is to create peace within and with others, Stopping by the Side of the Road gently offers comfort and peace to those experiencing death - their own or that of loved ones.

Ten years ago, the Scar Squad promised each other nothing would tear them apart. They stuck together through thick and thin, late-night surf sessions and after school spodies. Even when Casey Jones Caruso lost her twin brother Sammy to an overdose, and their foursome became a threesome, the squad picked each other up. But when Casey’s feeling for the remaining members—Francesca and Benjamin—develop into romantic attraction, she worries the truth will dissolve them and vows to ignore her heart.

Isaac Griffin has always felt something was missing from his life. And for good reason: he's never met his dad. He'd started to believe he'd never belong in this world, that the scattered missing pieces of his life would never come together, when he discovers a box hidden deep in the attic with his father's name on it. When the first clue points him to San Francisco, he sets off with his boyfriend to find the answers, and the person he’s been waiting his whole life for. But when his vintage station wagon breaks down, they are forced to rely on an unusual girl who goes by Max.

The summer after senior year should have been a time for Cam to party and hang out with his friends. It should also have been a time for him to win back the love of his life, Allison Tandy, who'd dumped him so brutally the year before. But it quickly becomes clear that this summer is going to be worse than a failure for Cam. It's going to be a tragedy. Ally is left comatose after a terrible car crash, then Cam tears his ACL in a basketball accident. The operation leaves him in agony, confined to his couch and ruminating over the fact that his ex may not survive.

Young children process grief very differently than adults, and sometimes there are physical sensations that are uncomfortable and can cause anxiety. This book is meant to be an introduction to identifying those physical feelings, starting with “butterflies” in the tummy, being unable to sleep, and having a tight chest. It is also intended to help young children learn how to deal with those feelings.

Written by a popular middle-grade author, this heartfelt and important treatment of anxiety and depression centers on a 10-year-old boy who begins to handle his grief after his mother disappears by creating a fantasy narrative of where she’s gone, with the help of a kindly neighbor who survived separation from her father during World War II.

When it comes to the end of a relationship, the loss of a loved one, or even a national tragedy, we are often told we need "closure." But while some people do find closure for their pain and grief, many more feel that closure does not exist and believe the notion only encourages false hopes. Sociologist Nancy Berns explores these ideas and their ramifications in her timely book, Closure.

Muitas pessoas que sofreram uma grande perda se sentem julgadas, ignoradas ou incompreendidas por uma cultura que tenta “resolver” o luto e “curar” uma dor que não pode ser remediada. Em Tudo bem não estar tudo bem, Megan nos convida a construir a melhor vida possível - uma vida que comporte a dor e a saudade, que não tente negar o vazio deixado pela perda. A partir dessa nova perspectiva, você vai aprender a dar pequenos passos para reconstruir seu mundo, respeitando seu tempo, ignorando conselhos ineficazes e honrando o amor daquele que se foi.

Mary Artino is a medical social worker with a 15-year career in hospice. She feels that loss is a subject that isn't addressed often enough in American culture and that much more can be done to begin teaching children about loss and death. This book is a collection of short stories that begins with her own experiences with death and loss within her family. The author believes that death is one of our most profound teachers. In writing Lessons on Loss Not Taught, Mary hopes to demystify the end-of-life experience, making it less foreboding and more relatable.

Whether you are a professional or someone who is supporting a loved one who is ill, this book has something to teach as well as provide comfort and guidance. As such, it is not meant to be an academic tome - rather, something you can listen to and hear a voice that will inspire you for this particular moment in time.

In this amazing work, Westbrook generously shares with us the tools he has used and created over the last 30 years to bring comfort - physical, spiritual, emotional, and intellectual - to the dying, the families of the dying, and their professional and lay caregivers. Using the narrative style of Native Americans, Westbrook role-models his tools through a series of powerful, poignant, and moving stand-alone stories which illustrate precisely how to journey and navigate some of the most difficult end-of-life situations, and to do so with grace, equanimity, and deep partnership. 

Although death is an inevitable part of life, how we choose to be with the dying and the bereaved is up to us. I encourage you to prepare and to embrace the possibility of a lovingly supported transition and, to that end, I include some resources that may help you. Being ready to be with is a wonderful way to live.