Horror Comedy Anthology

By day, Mark Wojcik can be found elbow-deep in engine grease, making cars and trucks safe for the highway. By night, he can be found traipsing through the wilds of Pennsylvania, making the world safe for humans. He's more than just a mechanic, he's a New Templar Knight. He travels the backroads and byways fighting weresquonks, ningen, selkies, ghosts, and . . . gnomes? Is that gnome . . . naked? (Sigh.) Season One collects the first four novellas in the Spells, Salt, & Steel series: Spells, Salt, & Steel; Open Season; Deep Trouble; and Close Encounters.

Haunted by Chuck Palahniuk is a novel made up of stories: 23 of them, to be precise. Twenty-three of the most horrifying, hilarious, mind-blowing, stomach-churning tales you'll ever encounter, sometimes all at once. They are told by people who have answered an ad headlined "Writers' Retreat: Abandon Your Life for Three Months", and who are led to believe that here they will leave behind all the distractions of "real life" that are keeping them from creating the masterpiece that is in them.

Here you have found a book so foul, so repulsive, so horrifying...that you will undoubtedly find yourself running to the nearest bathroom in an effort to both relieve your bowels and scrub your hands clean of its putrid filth. They have finally released this humorous collection of terrifying tales, despite the bitter public outcry which demanded these pages never see the light of day...and perhaps for good reason.

Now, available in audio for the first time, Side Effects is narrated by Woody Allen himself. A humor classic by one of the world’s funniest writers, Side Effects is a treat for Allen fans and those just discovering how gifted he is. In classics including "Remembering Needleman", "The Kugelmass Episode", "Confessions of a Burglar", and others, Allen discusses such subjects as the nature of relativity, the UFO menace, and the predicament of modern man.

Bubba’s back from Fairyland, and sometimes it feels like they shoulda just stayed there! Man, coming back to the real world sucks. Bubba and his whole team have been fired on account of going MIA for a year and a half (yeah, time moves differently in Fairyland - yay), and now they’ve got to…get jobs? Oh, this is going to go well.

Nobody likes getting bullied, and Donny has had enough. Deciding to take matters into his own hands, he solicits the help of the old Asian man at the end of his street to teach him Karate. During a grueling two days of training, Donny earns belt after belt, until he finally becomes a Karate Master.

The time is the early '80s. The characters go to the same schools and eat at the same restaurants. Their voices enfold us as seamlessly as those of DJs heard over a car radio. They have sex with the same boys and girls and buy from the same dealers. In short, they are connected in the only way people can be in that city.

Coffin Blossoms. A reminder that hope does spring eternal. In death itself, there is often beauty, life, and on rare occasions, even humor. The 24 stories in this anthology straddle the line between humor and horror in unique ways. Some wearing a wry smile. Others with tongue firmly in cheek. Ghosts, demons, vampires, myths, monsters, and murderers turned on their heads and shaken ‘til dizzy, then presented for you here, in Coffin Blossoms....

When bar owner Devon Kincaid finds a bleeding man - a hot, hard, handsome, naked bleeding man - in the snow one night, she brings him home to care for him. He's definitely not like any man she's ever met before, but what she doesn't realize is that he's not just a man.

Shingles Audio Collection, Volume 4 begins with "Carnival of Psychos". In this story, Richie Spoonerman finds himself being chased by a psychotic clown in the Maze of Mirrors at the carnival. In "That Time of the Month", Molly Stein's life was hard enough before she started noticing some weird changes. For one, a suspicious number of people seem to be exploding around her. Plus much more!

In the collection's marvelous title story, two aging vampires in a sun-drenched Italian lemon grove find their hundred-year marriage tested when one of them develops a fear of flying. In "The Seagull Army Descends on Strong Beach, 1979", a dejected teenager discovers that the universe is communicating with him through talismanic objects left in a seagull's nest. "Proving Up" and "The Graveless Doll of Eric Mutis" find Russell veering into more sinister territory.

It's been a year since Bubba settled things with his crazy brother Jason once and for all, and what a year it's been! The third volume of collected Bubba stories contains more monsters, more inter-dimensional travel, more duels to the death, and more guitar solos than any other season of Bubba yet! Wine, Women, & Song is a collected edition including the novellas Moon over Bourbon Street, Night at the Museum, Midsummer, Oh Bubba, Where Art Thou?

Los Angeles and Lucifer are a lot alike. They both seduce and lure with promises of wealth, fame, beauty, or love. But those promises are often empty; and even when they’re not, there’s a price to pay.

"Stranger's Thing" by Robert Bevan: Four friends get more than they bargained for when they break into a seemingly abandoned research lab. "The Shingling" by Steve Wetherell: Johnny Terry, a recovering meth addict, is excited to start his new life as the caretaker at the Underpass Motel. Unfortunately, the Underpass is haunted by the ghosts of dead porn stars. "The Haunting of Whore House" by Robert Bevan: Lucy and her brother, Junkie, find out that moving was only the beginning of their troubles when they encounter the ghost of a little boy in the woods. Plus three more!

Tales from the Eerie Canal weaves the sinister mystery of Edgar Allan Poe with the dark humor of Edward Gorey. No canal. No Lake Erie. Just a stream of the disturbing splashed with bits of the absurd.

Ready to feel the chills running down your spine? Wait, that's just the green gelatin monster from one of the stories in this collection of very silly (and a few not-so-silly) horror stories. Vampires, werewolves, demons, mummies, and zombies compete with evil little Shirley Temple look-alikes and their collectibles, centerpieces and church women, cops and monster hunters, for your laughs. It's a light-hearted take on the horror genre.

Dracula, Wolfman, The Mummy, Frankenstein. You've lived with the stories your whole life. You've read the tales. You've watched the films. But what if the stories were different? What if the things you read about these monsters were warped and twisted? Here lie stories you may not have heard. Stories both weird and shocking. Bizarre and grotesque. Alternate versions of your favorite classic monsters you've never read and never will again. Featuring 13 stories by Jonathan Moon, The Sisters of Slaughter, Tom Lucas and more!

It’s bad enough that its venom-dripping chelicerae can slice through flesh like warm butter. Worse? It’s right there under the bunk. It’s a fact now. To make it through the night, the children must obey the rules: don’t get out of bed, stay out of the shadows, and don’t wake the beast. But as the threats multiply, so do the rules of survival. And with the safety of dawn still hours away, the fun is just beginning.

The Best of Bizarro Fiction: Vol. 2 features 11 carefully crafted surreal tales of the absurd, the hilarious, and the outright horrific. Edited by Matthew A. Clarke.

Before she knows it, Turquoise finds herself in strange and perilous worlds populated by the likes of human oddities, shape-shifters, serial killers in flying saucers, flesh-eating hippies, man-eating house cats, and sleazy televangelists who produce snuff films for Christ.