Humor Dog

Melanie knew someone should have kept Barry Turk on a short leash. The star Poodle handler and lady killer had a habit of chicanery that bred contempt in the dog show circuit. But when Barry is shot dead in his own driveway, even Melanie is stunned at how unsporting the competition can get. Now, as Melanie digs for clues deep under Connecticut's well-groomed surface, she finds herself sniffing around in the killer's own backyard, and counts herself lucky to have the animal instincts to keep herself alive. .

Self-help books offer solid, beneficial techniques, but they really only work for the young. Award-winning comedy writer Gene Perret reveals that more mature devotees must adjust these techniques, tweak them, alter them, and in some cases, ignore them completely. New Tricks for Old Dogs points out some of the flaws in the self-help philosophy. It tempers the advice with common sense. The battle cry of this volume is do it, but don't overdo it.

Humorist Russell Johnson goes astray with stories about Duckton Abbey (Downton Abbey In A Duck Pond), the futility of Putting The Cat Back In The Bag, why he would like to be an octopus, his after-bucket list (Where to Go After You Die), his cure for SOHDD (Ask Your Doctor About Sense Of Humor Deficit Disorder), and other meanderings.

Cammie Breyer needs a big glass of Cabernet - her restaurant failed, and her chef boyfriend left for a hotter kitchen. Just when she thinks she's hit rock bottom, her aunt Ginger calls with a surprise. She's bought a vineyard - in Delaware. At Ginger's command, Cammie returns to Black Dog Bay, the seaside town where she spent her childhood summers with her aunt and her cousin, Kat.

Mara Brennan is about to unravel. Three days after her twenty-eighth birthday, her boyfriend dumps her, leaving her with nothing but a basement apartment, a futon and a pile of unpaid bills. On top of that, her job, working as a receptionist at a cosmetic surgery clinic is a nightmare; her boss is a tyrant; and her friends have gotten ahead of her in the game of life. Mara realizes it's time for an identity makeover. She devises the OM List, a personal pathway to perfection inspired by her best friends, Olivia and Mitz, and her newfound love for yoga.

Do you love animals and enjoy laughing? This is a collection of over 30 humorous animal shaggy dog stories and jokes about animals and their interaction with people. These tall tales were recorded live on The Jay and Julie Show, a radio program which ran for three years in South Florida. Jay and Julie explored the lighter side of politics, culture, and technology and they opened almost every show with a humorous story. This compilation contains the best animal tales from those broadcasts. They will make you laugh, and they will often surprise you.

Suzy Medley is having a bad day...when a shabby terrier turns up at her door. Just like Suzy, Scout has been abandoned, although only Suzy has been left with a financial mess and a business in tatters thanks to her ex. Suzy takes Scout in, and her chaotic world changes in unexpected ways: strangers have never been more welcoming, and her teenage kids can’t wait to come home to visit. Then a chance encounter on a windy Hebridean beach makes things more complicated, because Suzy isn’t the only one who needs a friend.

Banger and Mash knew something strange was happening when their peoples’ scent began to fade. Sweetpea the cat knew it too, but…you know…he just wasn’t that worried about it. But when their human vanishes into thin air right before their noses, they race to get help from the other dogs in the village, only to discover that EVERYONE'S humans have disappeared.

The author of the best-selling and award-winning Netherland now gives us his eagerly awaited, stunningly different new novel: a tale of alienation and heartbreak in Dubai. Distraught by a breakup with his long-term girlfriend, our unnamed hero leaves New York to take an unusual job in a strange desert metropolis. In Dubai at the height of its self-invention as a futuristic Shangri-la, he struggles with his new position as the "family officer" of the capricious and very rich Batros family.

Dog walker Ben Carter is shocked to discover that his mom's fiancé, Alvar, is an "encantado"–a shapeshifting dolphin that seduces human women and preys on their flesh. He races to Minnesota to stop their wedding, leaving demon dog Toby back in Chicago.

The "reigning czar of silliness" ( Publishers Weekly) once again brings listeners an irresistible collection of poems that will have tongues twisting, imaginations soaring, and sides aching with laughter. The result is genius, indeed.

Downward Dog tells the tale of a handsome Bad Boy who becomes a yoga instructor while trying to redeem his womanizing ways and win the forgiveness of the only woman he’s ever really loved. Down on his luck, thanks to a failed nightlife venture, our hero’s stuck with massive debt and broken dreams. His only safe haven is the yoga world, and when his well-connected best buddy launches his yoga career among New York City's elite, our working-class hero becomes a guru to society’s top one percent, a wolf let loose amongst a flock of comely sheep.

On a blustery day in late fall, Hank sneaks into the back of Slim's pickup and finds himself at a neighboring rancher's fall branding...the very neighbor, in fact, who owns the gorgeous Miss Scamper the Beagle! Unfortunately, Miss Scamper has always been a little hard to figure out, and he can't decide if she's crazy about him...or just plain crazy. And, as the day unfolds, it even begins to look like she's angling to land him in a heap of trouble with her pit bull boyfriend, Steel!

Kay Powell wants to find that break-out client who will become a star. And she thinks she's found him: His name is Bruno, and he has to be walked three times a day. Kay is the Agent to the Paws, representing showbiz clients who aren't exactly people. In fact: they're dogs. Bruno's humans, Trent and Louise, are pains in the you-know-what, and Les McMaster, the famous director mounting a revival of Annie, might not hire Bruno just because he can't stand them.

"This is an American book by an American dog.” Thus begins what is without a doubt the first book ever written by a Frenchie pug, or probably any dog, and quite possibly by any nonhuman in the history of nonhumankind. Born sometime in the early 1900s somewhere in New York City, Bandit the Frug does not remember his parents or any siblings, but he does recall muddy roads, cars, and horses navigating the streets at breakneck speed without turn signals, playing with his puppyhood pal - a Beagle named Digger, and the moment of realization that he, Bandit T. Frug, was...different.

In this very funny audiobook, Bobs gives us his opinions on everything from fireworks to frogs, cats to Christmas, in his own words. This collection of his letters takes us through a year in the life of Bobs, the adored pet terrier owned by national treasure Enid Blyton.

With millions of copies of his New York Times best-selling No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency mysteries in print across the globe, Alexander McCall Smith is one of the most popular novelists and humorists in the world. Starring the brilliant but bumbling Professor Doctor Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld, The Finer Points of Sausage Dogs is a wonderfully entertaining showcase for Smith's award-winning wit.

What do dogs think about when you leave them? Share this farting tale with loved ones. Adults are permitted to laugh, too. Perfect for ages 0 to 100+. A funny, fresh perspective from your dog's point of view.

I just returned from the mall after school shopping with my soon-to-be sophomore and her friend. I now understand why fathers opt to go camping, roll around in elk urine, and shit in a hole rather than go to the mall three days before school starts. As if the crowds weren’t bad enough, my girl decided to wear a flannel that hung lower than her shorts, making it appear that she was walking around naked from the waist down. She was flocked by sales people, who, I am sure, were calculating their commissions in their heads. I mean, why not?

Thirteen-year-old Jordan Mendoza has a huge crush on his classmate, Sierra, but he’s never going to win her affections if he stays a C student and keeps embarrassing himself on the basketball court. And it doesn’t help that his best friend, Antonio, likes to tease him about it all a little too much. But when Jordan dives into the waters of a dangerous irrigation canal to save a drowning puppy, he’s suddenly got even more on his mind than kissing Sierra and making the starting team.