Humorous Fiction Family

Clarice Bean usually looks forward to Christmas. Except this year, it is going to be a quiet-ish Christmas in her house, which doesn’t feel right because Christmas is all about noisiness and being full up and family. And without those things, she is going to have to try exceptionordinarily hard to stop the Christmas spirit completely floating away.... But luckily, there is no one in the world like Clarice Bean - and she is going to think like an elf, and that means everything will be A-okay. Won’t it?

Welcome to the Rotten School, a new series set in a boarding school that's rotten to the core. The school motto is Growth, Learning, Pizza. Meet charming conniver Bernie Bridges, his arch-rival Sherman Oaks, housemother Mrs. Heinie, Coach Bunz, Headmaster I. Will Upchuck, and the rest of the students and faculty in two stories that prove that while good is good and bad is better, rotten is the best of all!

The Christmas-crazy Carrolls are back—and this time, they have an ice-skating baby penguin! There’s a new family in town determined to steal the Carrolls’ tinselly crown. Can Holly and her family win the Christmas Chronicle’s competition for the Most Festive Family? Or will they discover that there is more to life than perfect Christmas decorations, a personal toboggan run, and more pressies than you can shake a candy cane at?

When the Problim children’s ramshackle bungalow in the Swampy Woods goes kaboom, the seven siblings—each born on a different day of the week—have to move into their grandpa’s bizarre old mansion in Lost Cove. No problem! For the Problim children, every problem is a gift!

Every morning, Judy measures Stink, and it's always the same: 3 feet, 8 inches tall. Stink feels like even the class newt is growing faster than he is. Then one day, the ruler reads 3 feet, 7 and 3/4 inches! Can it be? Is Stink shrinking? Stink tries everything to look like he's growing, but wearing up-and-down stripes and spiking his hair don't seem to be fooling anybody into thinking he's taller.

Bick, Beck, Storm, and Tommy Kidd have uncovered and rescued some of the world’s greatest treasure, without ever seeking out fame and glory. So they aren’t happy when the Collier Kids (as in Nathan Collier, the Kidds’s nemesis) start treasure hunting for the camera, more focused on looking good and selling ads for their streaming show than actually recovering treasure. When the Kidds are invited to compete with the Colliers for the title of “The World’s Greatest Treasure Hunting Kids,” they jump at the chance to show the world what real treasure hunting looks like.

Eleven year-old Peter Lee has one goal in life: to become a paleontologist. Okay, maybe two: to get his genius kid sister, L.B., to leave him alone. But his summer falls apart when his real-life dinosaur expedition turns out to be a bust, and he watches his dreams go up in a cloud of asthma-inducing dust.

James Patterson's newest hilarious heroine returns in Jacky Ha-Ha: My Life Is a Joke, the sequel to the smash hit Jacky Ha-Ha—a number one New York Times best seller! Jacky Hart has found a hidden talent in the performing arts, and she's a triple threat onstage! She wants nothing more than to act and sing all summer—but her parents have other plans for her. Jacky reluctantly signs up for a summer job in her resort town of Seaside Heights, New Jersey, where tourists come to enjoy the beach and fun carnival atmosphere.

Theodosia Throckmorton has her hands full at the Museum of Legends and Antiquities in London. Her father may be head curator, but it is Theoand only Theowho is able to see all the black magic and ancient curses that still cling to the artifacts in the museum. Sneaking behind her fathers back, Theo uses old, nearly forgotten Egyptian magic to remove the curses and protect her father and the rest of the museum employees from the ancient, sinister forces that lurk in the museums dark hallways.

Billy and Sheena always expect adventure when they join their uncle, Dr. Deep, aboard his hi-tech boat. What they don't expect is a treasure hunt leading to a 200-year-old sea captain...who refuses to stay dead!

Lenny Marks is excellent at not having a life. She bikes home from work at exactly 4pm each day, buys the same groceries for the same meals every week, and owns thirty-six copies of The Hobbit (currently arranged by height). The closest thing she has to a friendship is playing Scrabble against an imaginary Monica Gellar while watching Friends reruns. And Lenny Marks is very, very good at not remembering what happened the day her mother and stepfather disappeared when she was still a child. The day a voice in the back of her mind started whispering, You did this.

Meet the world’s funniest kindergartner - Junie B. Jones! It’s kindergarten graduation, and room nine is getting bright white graduation gowns. Teacher says to keep them in their boxes until the big day. But Junie B. Jones just can’t help herself. Then - uh-oh! - an accident happens! Will graduation be a spotty dotty disaster?

Sasquatch! That's who Judy looks like in her school picture. Antarctica! That's where Judy's been sent three times in a single sour-ball week to chill out. Can Judy's mood get any worse? Well, duh! Of course it can. Unless…it's Backward Day! That means it's time for Judy to turn that frown upside down, make lemonade out of lemons, and be nice to stinky little brothers. Can she stay in a good-not-bad mood for an entire day? How about seven whole days? Will her friends freak out when they see a tidy, on-time Judy who smells like cupcake lip gloss?

Nelson is a ninja. He's not the coolest. Or the bravest. But he is the world's nerdiest ninja! And now he has to stop an animal rampage and machines going crazy all over town! For that, he'll need his new jetpack...and some serious ninja skills! How will Nelson learn to fly when he's scared of heights?

Of course, there’s nothing Harriet doesn't like about Marble Island, the small island off the coast of California where her nanu runs a cozy little bed and breakfast. And nobody doesn’t love Moneypenny, Nanu’s old basset hound. But Harriet doesn’t like the fact that Dad made this decision without even asking her.

In this follow up to the #1 New York Times bestseller I Funny, middle schooler Jamie Grimm has big dreams of being the best stand-up comic in the world—and he won't let the fact that he's wheelchair-bound stand in his way. After winning the New York state finals in the Planet's Funniest Kid Comic Contest, Jamie's off to Boston to compete in the national semi-finals.

The utterly wonderful Clarice Bean is thinking about the endangered things: the big creatures, the little creatures, the plants and the trees. But it’s not just the planet that needs help – there’s her whole family too.

At age 10, Jenni Farrow and her new best friend, Timmy Caruso, enjoy a glorious summer on Pearl Island filled with fireworks, beach days, and carnival rides (not to mention that strange sea creature they rescue from a tide pool). Then, one late summer day, Timmy disappears. Thirty years later, Jenni—now Jenn Lanaro, best-selling author of the Philipia Bay action-romance series—is desperate to escape the fatigue of her career and her soon-to-be-ex-husband.

Anastasia is a completely average almost-eleven-year-old. That is, UNTIL her parents die in a tragic vacuum-cleaner accident. UNTIL she's rescued by two long-lost great-aunties. And UNTIL she's taken to their delightful and, er, "authentic" Victorian home, St. Agony's Asylum for the Criminally Insane. But something strange is going on at the asylum. Anastasia soon begins to suspect that her aunties are not who they say they are. So when she meets Ollie and Quentin, two mysterious brothers, the three join together to plot their great escape!

For an athlete like Matt Daniels, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. It's also the most dangerous. That's because somebody is about to pull a mean prank. The recipe is simple: Just add Monster Blood. As if Matt's problems weren't big and slimy enough, a surprise invitation will lead to even more trouble. How long can Matt survive inside a terrifying theme park? Not very long if his friends keep disappearing!