Humorous Fiction Family

Olivia is a vegetarian. Ivy is a vampire. And they're twins?!? Ever since Olivia discovered that her long-lost twin sister, Ivy, is a vampire, she's been soaking up everything Ivy will tell her about Franklin Grove's vampire community. It's all top secret, and Olivia's sworn that she'll never tell another soul. But now, nosy tabloid reporter Serena Star is snooping around. As she gets closer and closer to the truth, it's up to Ivy and Olivia to throw her off track. This is one fangtastic news story that can't get out!

Meet Weir Do. No, that's not a typo, that's his name! Weir Do's the new kid in school. With an unforgettable name, a crazy family, and some seriously weird habits, fitting in won't be easy...but it will be funny!

Mom and Dad do so much for Pete, he decides to say thank you with a rockin' surprise! But how can Pete show Mom and Dad how much he loves them? In this groovy story, Pete learns that it's not what you do but how you do it that matters, so long as it comes from the heart.

Lucille is very jealous of her little sister, Margaret. Everything Margaret does gets attention, and Lucille feels left out. When their grandma comes to visit, Lucille must learn how to deal with her jealousy.

It's report card day, the most dreaded day of Hank Zipzer's school year. And when Hank gets his grades, they're his worst nightmare come true: a D in spelling, a D in reading, a D in math. This is not going to make his parents happy. This will certainly get him grounded for life. Hank needs help. And he needs it fast!

Campus Chronicles will inspire you, amuse you, and support you through your college years. Whether you are a high-school student just leaving for college, or a college senior who has seen it all, these stories will illuminate the college experience for you.

Four hilarious stories with amazing music and sound effects. Henry is dragged to dancing classes against his will; vies with Moody Margaret to make the yuckiest Glop!; goes camping in France; and tries to be good like Perfect Peter, but not for long.

Sisters Hope, Faith and Mercy have everything: fame, success, money and beauty. But what Hope wants most of all is love, and it doesn’t matter how far she has to go to find it. Except real life isn't like the movies. Even if you're a Valentine...

In this Junior Library Guild selection, Little Rose must brush her teeth, wash her face, and climb into bed while Mama takes a quick phone call. But as the call drags on, waves of uninvited guests pass through the front door. Soon the house overflows with bizarre visitors—from “muscley” men to winking wizards. As Mama continues to ignore the raucous revelry, Rose finally joins the party. But before the uproar gets out of hand, something quite surprising happens.

Tallulah strives for perfection during ballet class and dreams of dancing a solo in the upcoming recital, but her little brother Beckett, who misbehaves all during class, gets a better role than she does.

This fun-filled tale by acclaimed children’s author Laura McGee Kvasnosky was named an ALA Notable Children’s Book and received the Theodor Seuss Geisel Beginning Reader Award. Fox sisters Zelda and Ivy refuse to eat cucumber sandwiches for lunch ever again. To avoid this nasty meal, they pack their bags and run away (even if they only make it to the backyard). The young foxes’ adventures are separated into three chapters - perfect for young listeners.

When Junior Blossom wakes up in the hospital, his last memory is of crouching on the barn roof with cloth wings tied to his arms, and of Maggie and Vern in the yard below, urging him to fly. That had been just before Junior spotted a police car approaching the farm in a cloud of dust. Meanwhile Pap, the children's grandfather, sits in disgrace in the city jail. He was arrested for disturbing the peace after his pickup truck accidentally dumped 2,147 beer and soda cans (worth $107.35) on Spring Street. With their mother away on the rodeo circuit, it's up to Maggie and Vern to find a way to rescue Pap and Junior.

Rafe Khatchadorian has never been cool. But all that changes when he becomes the guitarist in an awesome rock band and wrangles a part-time job at Hills Village's trendiest new coffee shop slash yoga studio. No more being at the bottom of the middle school food chain—Rafe is finally going to be popular! He just has two teeny problems: the awesome rock band is led by none other than the school bully. And the band actually isn't awesome—they absolutely stink, and Rafe has to whip them into shape for the Best Band Competition.

Kuplink, kuplank, kuplunk! Sal and her mother are picking blueberries to can for the winter. But when Sal wanders to the other side of Blueberry Hill, she discovers a mama bear preparing for her own long winter. Meanwhile Sal's mother is being followed by a small bear with a big appetite for berries! Will each mother go home with the right little one?

Thanks to his invention of Sweet Farts, the tablets that cancel even the most ripe and pungent fart smells, Keith has become the center of all kinds of attention he doesn’t want. His kid sister has turned into a farting maniac, and his parents blame him. His so-called best friends torture him at school with nicknames like “S.B.D.” (for Silent But Deadly) and try to humiliate him every chance they get. The principal wants to know what Keith’s next brilliant invention will be.

How serious is stage fright? At the Hanging Hill Playhouse, it can kill you. After narrowly escaping a malevolent spirit in The Crossroads, Zack and Judy are hoping to relax during the rehearsals for a show based on Judy's best-selling children's books. Little do they know that the director is planning to raise a horde of evil specters from the dead, and to accomplish this, he needs a human sacrifice...and Zack fits the bill perfectly.

So much to see! So much to do! Listen to this audiobook and...meet people and animals in such far-flung places as Minot, Minneapolis, Tuscaloosa, Tucumcari, and the Grand Canyon.... Smell the tall flowers in Aunt Giraffe's garden, sip juice with a big blue goose, eat oodles of noodles with some poodles, and much, much more!

“Alex Peter Gregory, you are a moron!” Laurie slammed her palms down on my desk and stomped her foot. I get a lot of that. One car crash. One measly little car crash. And suddenly, I’m some kind of convicted felon. My parents are getting divorced, my dad is shacking up with my third-grade teacher. I might be in love with a girl who could kill me with one finger, and now I’m sentenced to baby-sit some insane old guy. What else could possibly go wrong? This is the story of Alex Gregory, his guitar, his best gal pal Laurie, and the friendship of a lifetime that he never would have expected.

Peoples are strange! The things they are doing and saying - sometimes they make no sense. Did their brains fall out of their heads? And why so much saying, so much talking all the time day and night, all those words spilling out of those mouths? Why so much? Why don't they be quiet? In the ancient stone tower of the Casa Rosa, in a tiny village high in the Swiss Alps, life for one angel has been the same, well, for as long as she (or he?) can remember.

Afternoon kindergarten is having a field day, and Junie B. Jones is team captain! Only, here's the problem: Room Eight keeps on winning too many events. And so how will Room Nine ever become the kindergarten champions? As Captain Field Day, will Junie B. find a way to lead her team to victory? Or will it be up to someone else to save the day?