Humorous Fiction Family

It's pooey on B-A-B-I-E-S until Junie B. finds out that her new dumb old baby brother is a big fat deal. Her two bestest friends are giving her everything they own just to see him. And guess what else? Maybe she can bring him to school on Pet Day.

This second audiobook in Sarah Mlynowski's charming new series puts a fresh spin on the Cinderella story! Once upon a time my brother and I found a magic mirror. Tonight the mirror swept us into Cinderella's fairy tale. Now, we are not messing this story up. No way. Cinderella is going to marry her prince just like she's supposed to. Uh-oh. Cinderella broke her foot and there's massive swelling. The glass slipper won't fit, the prince won't know she's the one for him, and they won't live happily ever after. And it's all our fault!

The marshals are looking for the perfect girl to join a mother, father, and son on the run from the nation's most notorious criminals. After all, the bad guys are searching for a family with one kid, not two, and adding a streetwise girl who knows a little something about hiding things may be just what the marshals need. Nicki swears she can keep the Trevor family safe, but to do so she'll have to dodge hit men, cyberbullies, and the specter of standardized testing, all while maintaining her marshal-mandated B-minus average.

Melding the entirely true and the wildly fictional, Dead End in Norvelt is a novel about an incredible two months for a kid named Jack Gantos, whose plans for vacation excitement are shot down when he is "grounded for life" by his feuding parents, and whose nose spews bad blood at every little shock he gets. But plenty of excitement (and shocks) are coming Jack's way once his mom loans him out to help a fiesty old neighbor with a most unusual chore—typewriting obituaries filled with stories about the people who founded his utopian town.

Thirteen-year-old Steven has a totally normal life (well, almost): he drums in the All-Star Jazz Band, has a crush on the hottest girl in school (who doesn’t know he’s alive), frequently finds himself sitting across from his school counselor (who bribes him with candy), and is constantly annoyed by his five-year-old brother, Jeffrey (who is cuter than cute). But when Jeffrey gets sick, Steven’s world is turned upside down as he is forced to deal with his brother’s illness, his parents’ attempts to keep the family in one piece, the band, overdue homework, girls, and of course, Dangerous Pie.

An unsent letter in a first-edition copy of Charlotte's Web leads to a hunt for treasure in this heartwarming middle-grade mystery from the author of The Mother-Daughter Book Club. Now that Truly Lovejoy's father has been injured by an IED in Afghanistan and is having trouble finding work back home, the family moves from Texas to tiny Pumpkin Falls, New Hampshire, to take over Lovejoy's Books, a struggling bookstore that's been in the family for 100 years.

Clarice Bean usually looks forward to Christmas. Except this year, it is going to be a quiet-ish Christmas in her house, which doesn’t feel right because Christmas is all about noisiness and being full up and family. And without those things, she is going to have to try exceptionordinarily hard to stop the Christmas spirit completely floating away.... But luckily, there is no one in the world like Clarice Bean - and she is going to think like an elf, and that means everything will be A-okay. Won’t it?

Ella Brook can't wait to grow up, because one day she will become a fairy and have her own sparkly wings and a teacher on Fairy Tube, just like her mom! Until then, Ella has to learn by watching her mom in action. But sometimes spells go wrong, and Ella's mom can never seem to remember the right magic codes on her Computawand. A lot of the time, it's up to Ella to come to the rescue. Does she have what it takes to be a fairy one day? Or will there be more glitches than glitter?

A couple awakens in a home in the woods to find themselves rapidly aging as their toddler remains unchanged. A work-worn employee navigates conspiracy theories and the threat of violence in an abandoned office. A tour guide leads a troublesome group to an ancient structure, apparently nonhuman in origin, discovering along the way that the most mysterious creatures of all are right beside him.

Meet eleven-year-old Dara Palmer. She loves dancing and dreams of being a world famous actress - which means she has to get the main part in the school play. When she doesn't get any part at all, Dara begins to wonder whether it's because of her looks rather than her acting skills. But Dara has big ideas - and is determined not to let prejudice stop her from being in the spotlight.

Of especially naughty children it is sometimes said, "They must have been raised by wolves." The Incorrigible children actually were. Turning sixteen is a bittersweet occasion for Miss Penelope Lumley: Her parents remain disappointingly absent, and her perfectly nice young playwright friend, Simon Harley-Dickinson, has not been heard from since he went to visit his ailing great-uncle Pudge in the old sailors' home in Brighton.

Sister Bear is a super soccer player. She’s fast on her feet. She kicks the ball with the power of a cub twice her size. She’s should be a shoo-in at soccer tryouts...except for one little problem. Sister Bear is too small. Will Sister make the team despite her size? This engaging audio chapter book features all your favorite Berenstain Bear family and friends. Sister is fast on her feet. She kicks the ball with the power of a cub twice her size. Yet, even Mama, Papa, and Brother think she has set her sights too high because the other kids are all bigger than Sister. Is Sister Bear too small to make the team?

Did you know that Cinderella’s stepsisters got their eyes pecked out by birds? Really. And that Rumpelstiltskin ripped himself in half? And that in "The Mouse, the Bird, and the Sausage", a mouse, a bird, and a sausage all talk to each other? (Okay, I guess that one’s not that grim.) Those are the real fairy tales. But they have nothing on the fairy tales in this audiobook.

In December 2013, an ice storm buries Toronto as realtor Laura Keys prepares to sell a one-of-a-kind house on behalf of its comatose owner. Haunting Laura, and longing to be invited in, is a mysterious teenage girl with a Scottish terrier tucked into her coat. As Laura readies the house for showing, she learns more about its owner, Edna "Eddie" Ferguson. Leading up to the Great Snowstorm of 1944, Eddie, a brickmaker, enters into a passionate yet ill-fated affair with her boss's daughter. While uncovering the past, Laura navigates both the death of her mother and a troubled marriage.

When her father loses his job, Ramona decides to help out. Maybe she could earn a million dollars making a TV commercial, or get her father to stop smoking to save money (and his lungs). She is full of ideas. Some work, some don't. But when her father says he wouldn't trade her for a million dollars, Ramona knows all is right in her world.

Julie thinks her new neighbors must be very scary because all the stuff being moved into their house is enormous. Then she meets David and finds out that he's just a normal, regular boy. But when David's father calls him for supper the sound makes Julie jump in the air, run in a circle three times, run home and lock herself in her room until it is time for breakfast the next day. Could David's father be a giant?

One morning, Jessa-Lynn Morton walks into the family taxidermy shop to find that her father has committed suicide, right there on one of the metal tables. Shocked and grieving, Jessa steps up to manage the failing business, while the rest of the Morton family crumbles. Her mother starts sneaking into the shop to make aggressively lewd art with the taxidermied animals. Her brother Milo withdraws, struggling to function. And Brynn, Milo's wife - and the only person Jessa's ever been in love with - walks out without a word.

Paddington Bear always manages to find himself in tricky situations, sometimes extraordinary situations. Like the time he had a difficult encounter with a policeman or when he found himself in deep water with a newspaper reporter. But since arriving from his native Peru after an earthquake Paddington has always felt at home with the Brown family who found him on Paddington station.

Alexander’s dad has a new job 1,000 miles away, so now his family has to move. Alexander would rather have poison ivy. Maybe he could live with the Baldwins and their dog. He’s always wanted a dog. How can he leave Rachel, his favorite baby-sitter, who taught him to stand on his head and whistle with two fingers (but not at the same time)? And his best friend Paul, who’s like a brother, except that he doesn’t call Alexander "puke-face" like his real brother does? Just as Alexander is ready to hide from his parents, Dad decides that a boy might need a dog....

In rural North Carolina, in 1951, despite parental reassurances, a typhoid shot hurt. It hurt even more when the children saw who would be administering the shot: Miss Winnie, a large, dictatorial nurse who had been "especially built by the nursing school so she would never blow away in a hard wind".