Primary For Children

Like the previous books in A Series of Unfortunate Events, there is nothing to be heard here but misery, despair, and discomfort, and you still have time to choose something else to listen to.

This audio is the only one which describes every last detail of the Baudelaire children's miserable stay at Heimlich Hospital, which makes it one of the most dreadful audios in the world.

Nobody in their right minds would listen to this particular book about the lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay at the village of V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded on this program.

Book two left off with Gregor reading the Prophecy of Blood: a prophecy that calls for Gregor and Boots to return to the Underland to help ward off a plague. But this time, Gregor's mother refuses to let Gregor return to the Underland...until the rat Ripred assures the family that Gregor and Boots are needed only for a short meeting, which the crawlers will attend only if their "princess" Boots is present.

When the Dearly's Dalmatians have their first litter of puppies (fifteen in all) everyone is delighted. But their joy is shattered when the pups are kidnapped! The humans don't have a clue as to who the culprit is, but the smartest dogs in London are on the case, and on the trail of fur-loving Cruella de Vil, who will stop at nothing to have a Dalmatian fur coat!

The word "carnivorous", which appears in the title of this book, means "meat-eating", and once you have read such a bloodthirsty word, there is no reason to read any further. This carnivorous volume contains such a distressing story that consuming any of its contents would be far more stomach-turning than even the most imbalanced meal.

Like handshakes or housepets, many things are preferable when not slippery. Unfortunately, in this miserable volume, I am afraid that Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire run into more than their fair share of slipperiness during their harrowing journey up, and down, a range of strange and distressing mountains.

A knight at last, Alanna of Trebond heads out to seek adventure in the desert of Tortall. Captured by desert tribesmen, she is forced to prove herself in a magical duel to the death. But her real challenge doesn't come until after she wins. As the first female shaman, Alanna must fight to change the ancient traditions of the stubborn desert tribes, for their own sake and for the sake of all Tortall.

Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle lives in an upside-down house and smells like cookies. She was even married to a pirate once. Most of all, she knows everything about children. She can cure them of any ailment. Patsy hates baths. Hubert never puts anything away. Allen eats v-e-r-y slowly. Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle has a treatment for all of them.

Taran, the assistant pig-keeper who wants to be a hero, goes questing for knowledge of his parentage, hoping that his journey will ennoble him in the eyes of Eilonwy, the princess with the red-gold hair. Accompanied by several loyal friends, Taran begins his search when three wily enchantresses of the Marshes of Morva send him to consult the Mirror of Llunet for the answers he is seeking, cryptically promising that "the finding takes no more than the looking".

Taran dreams of adventure, but nothing exciting ever happens to an Assistant Pig-Keeper, until his pig runs away. A chase through the woods leads Taran far from home and into great danger, for evil prowls the land of Prydain. With a collection of strange and wonderful friends whom he meets on his journey, Taran finds himself fighting so that good may triumph over evil, and so that his beloved home will not fall to a diabolical fiend.

The Dark is rising in its last and greatest bid to control the world. And Will Stanton, last-born of the immortal Old Ones, dedicated to keeping the world free, must join forces with his ageless master Merriman and Bran, the Welsh boy whose destiny ties him to the Light.

The "true story" behind Alice in Wonderland! Princess Alyss Heart is brutally cast out of Wonderland by her vicious Aunt Redd, who beheads Alyss' mother ("Off with her head!" she cries) and begins to rule over Wonderland with an iron fist. Alyss escapes and is exiled to another world entirely, Victorian London. At age 20, she returns to Wonderland to battle Redd, reclaim the throne, and lead Wonderland into its next golden age of imagination.

The winsome Anne Shirley is grown, has married her beloved Gilbert, and is the mother of six frolicsome children. Anne and her family experience some unimaginable events when a strange family moves into a nearby mansion. The Meredith family is comprised of two boys and two girls, a minister father but no mother, and a runaway girl named Mary Vance.

Since Mia's the brand-new crown princess of Genovia, indomitable dowager princess Grandmere arranges a national primetime interview for her. With just a few innocent remarks, Mia manages to enrage her best friend Lilly, practically get one of her teachers fired, and alienate the entire country of Genovia. (Population 50,000, but still!)

Jim Frayne has run away from Sleepyside, before Trixie could tell him that he is the sole heir to a huge fortune. With her best friend, Honey, Trixie sets out in a trailer across upstate New York to track Jim down...and stumbles upon another mystery along the way!

Fans of the ingenious little monkey will not be disappointed as he embarks on a wild series of adventures in a traveling circus.

Tree-ear is an orphan boy in a 12th-century Korean potters’ village. When he accidentally breaks a pot, he must work for the master to pay for the damage by setting off on a difficult and dangerous journey that will change his life forever.

When her best friend and neighbor Margaret comes to her with a problem, Clementine goes to many lengths to help her friend. This sets off a rollicking adventure-filled week that finds Clementine getting into and out of further trouble, while learning valuable life lessons.

In this sequel to The Princess and the Goblin, Curdie has returned to his life as a miner and has dismissed the supernatural happenings of the past, believing them to have been a dream. When Curdie callously wounds a pigeon, his conscience leads him to Princess Irene's mystical great-great-grandmother for help. She has him plunge his hands into a pile of rose petals that burns like fire. Extraordinarily, this grants him the power to see what kind of "animal" a person is at heart.