Teen Humor

Felton Reinstein has never been good with stress. Which is why he's seriously freaking out. Revealing his college choice on national TV? It's a heart attack waiting to happen. Deciding on a major for the next four years of his life? Ridiculous. He barely even knows who he is outside of football. And so...he embarks on The Epic Quest to Be Meaningful.

Jesse is having the worst year. First a race of homicidal (but very polite) aliens invaded Earth, killing pretty much everyone and enslaving the few people left behind, including Jesse; his best friend, Michael; his sort-of girlfriend, Lauren; and the girl of his dreams, Catlin. Then he and the other survivors discovered that they had some sort of latent telepathic abilities that made them dangerous to the aliens, so their only hope for survival was to run away. But not everyone made it out alive.

From the author of Layoverland comes another bitingly clever, laugh-out-loud funny novel, about a group of teen girls going up against an exploitative megachurch in their small Montana town.

It’s Libra Season, and Cat Phillips is ready to run headfirst into love. The only problem is that her crush is on her best friend, Alison Bridgewater, who is more interested in chatting with boys. Maybe Cat should take this as a sign to get over Alison, even if that means dating the musically challenged Jamie Owusu. After all, a new boyfriend is the best cleanse, at least according to Cat’s friends. Unfortunately, having a boyfriend is a lot harder than Cat expected.

In order to support her family and maintain their ancient castle in Lesser Hoo, 17-year-old Althea bears the burden of finding a wealthy suitor who can remedy their financial problems. But there are few wealthy suitors - or suitors of any kind--in Lesser Hoo. Then, the young and attractive (and very rich) Lord Boring arrives, and Althea sets her plans in motion. There's only one problem; his friend and business manager Mr. Fredericks keeps getting in the way. And, as it turns out, Fredericks has his own set of plans....

Vampires have walked among us for thousands of years. These reanimated corpses survive by draining and consuming the blood of the living, and their threat to humanity cannot be ignored. Throughout the centuries, professors and peasants have offered their own vampire-fighting tips, but these were often old wives' tales, based more on superstition than on fact. Here, for the first time, is a comprehensive vampire-fighting guide for the 21st century.

Leon John Crothers is 4779 days old (thirteen years and one month, if you're mathematically challenged). He has been 'moved on' from six different schools and most people think he has an attitude problem. Leon doesn't care for the label, in the same way that he doesn't care for Tim Burton, supermarket trolleys, train fanatics or Bounty bars. This time, however, things may turn out differently, as help comes from where he least expects it—Dr Snot, a physician at pains to help Leon navigate 'normal' and classmates, Tanya and Lawrence, who both face their own challenges.

An escape-artist monkey lets out some threatening animals, causing a CODE RED emergency. Javier, an exhausted barrista in dire need of a holiday, gets roped into helping his zookeeper friend defuse the situation.

To become a Dark Lord is no easy thing. The simple ambition to hold dominion over the world and bend all to your will sounds straightforward, but it's not. There are armies to raise, fortresses to build, heroes to defeat, and battles to be fought. After many spectacular failures, Evil decided to lend more than inspiration to these would-be tyrants. He wrote an easy-to-follow Dark Lord's Handbook. And yet the next Dark Lord that came along screwed up like all the others.

Welcome to Equillian, a nautical world where magic is outlawed, pirates plague the seas, and the fates of humankind are destined by the stars. Our story begins in a time when Equillian's precincts stand united, but their people are divided between the impoverished and the privileged. With the alchemists enchanted objects having been banned for the last 28 years, steam power is on the rise and a mysterious element whispers of unparalleled power.

Sheils is very pleased with her perfectly controlled life (controlling others while she's at it). She's smart, powerful, the student body chair, and she even has a loving boyfriend. What more could a girl ask for? But everything changes when the first-ever interspecies transfer student, a pterodactyl named Pyke, enrolls at her school. There's something about him - something primal - that causes the students to lose control whenever he's around.

Sixteen-year-old Bentley Royce seems to have it all: an actual Bentley, tuition to a fancy private school, lavish vacations, and everything else that comes along with being an LA starlet. But after five seasons on her family's reality show, Rolling with the Royces, and a lifetime of dealing with her narcissistic sister, Porsche; media-obsessed mother, Mercedes; and somewhat clueless brother, Maybach, Bentley wants out. Luckily for her, without a hook for season six, cancellation is looming, and freedom is nigh.

Per sfuggire alla vita di città, la piccola Aglaia insieme a Bianca, la sua amica "grande", decide di andare ad abitare in cima a un albero. È un albero speciale, fantastico, infinito, popolato da strani condomini che si rivelano poco amichevoli. Una comunità davvero strana fatta di cani che volano, neonati che miagolano, gatti che parlano e piante carnivore.

The war is on! Never have the stakes been so high. Never have the trenches been so deep. Never has one soda vending machine been so vital. When the high school cheerleading team takes over the machine's funds previously collected by the pep band, Gabe will not stand for it. Something must be done.

To say eighteen-year-old Farrah Higgins—or Digit—is good at math is a laughable understatement. She’s been cracking codes since childhood, and is finally at home with “her people” at MIT in Cambridge. Her talents are so off the charts that her laptop is under surveillance by both the CIA and an ecoterrorist named Jonas Furnis. So when she thoughtlessly hacks into the Department of Defense’s database, she lands in serious hot water inside and outside the law.

Quinn Avery can handle change. It's just paint, right? Bright, blinding white paint covering her once dazzling red bedroom walls. Quinn knows she shouldn't be angry at her mom - she's doing what she must to sell the house - but still, Quinn is beyond mad, and she doesn't know what to do about it.

Ruby is back at Tate Prep, and it's her 37th week in the state of Noboyfriend. Her panic attacks are bad, her love life is even worse, and what's more: Noel is writing her notes, Jackson is giving her frogs, Gideon is helping her cook, and Finn is making her brownies. Rumors are flying, and Ruby's already-sucky reputation is heading downhill.

The day I realized my brother would be a rock star...was the same day I accidentally pooped my pants. They’re not related, just memorable. Should my famous brother be writing his own story? Certainly. But...I'm the one they got to tell the story. Where is he?

Skylar's got ambitious #goals. And if she wants them to come true, she has to get to work now. (At least she thinks so....) Step one in her epic plan is showing everyone that her latest app is brilliant. To do that, she's going to use it to win State at the Scholastic Exposition, the nerdiest academic competition around. First, she'll need a team, and Skylar's not always so good with people. But she'll do whatever it takes to put one together...even if it means playing Cupid for her teammates Joey and Zane, at Joey's request.

Sunny Song's Big Summer Goals: 1. Make Rafael Kim my boyfriend (finally!). 2. Hit 100K followers (almost there...). 3. Have the best last summer of high school ever. Not on Sunny's list? Accidentally filming a PG-13 cooking video that goes viral (#browniegate). Extremely not on her list? Being shipped off to a digital-detox farm camp in Iowa (IOWA??) for a whole month.