Teen Humor

All 16-year-old Cameron wants is to get through high school - and life in general - with a minimum of effort. It's not a lot to ask. But that's before he's given some bad news: he's sick and he's going to die. Which totally sucks. Hope arrives in the winged form of Dulcie, a loopy punk angel/possible hallucination with a bad sugar habit. She tells Cam there is a cure - if he's willing to go in search of it.

Doug Lee is undead quite by accident... attacked by a desperate vampire, he finds himself cursed with being fat and 15 forever. When he has no luck finding some goth chick with a vampire fetish, he resorts to sucking the blood of cows under cover of the night. But it's just not the same. Then he meets the new Indian exchange student and falls for her - hard. Yeah, he wants to bite her, but he also wants to prove himself to her. But like the laws of life, love, and high school, the laws of vampire existence are complicated.

Sixteen-year-old Bianca Torre is an avid birder undergoing a gender identity crisis and grappling with an ever-growing list of fears. Some, like Fear #6: Initiating Conversation, keep them constrained, forcing them to watch birds from the telescope in their bedroom.

The Chosen One must be retrieved from Earth. He will bring down the wall and restore the kingdom to glory. His name is Tom Parking. With this mysterious yet oddly ordinary-looking prophecy, Tom’s fate is sealed: he’s been plucked from his life and whisked away to a magical kingdom to be its Chosen One.

Alison is back to share summer with James. The only problem is, James' lawyer says that they are going to fight his effort to adopt her. James has to pull in his natural proclivity to punch something until it gives in with the government....But, unfortunately for the government, James' friends have his back. If James is able to adopt Alison, will he leave everyone else alone? For Alison, she thought this was going to be an easy summer, but she had no idea what James wanted her to learn. She might not still want James as father, after all.

Lex, a teenage Grim Reaper, has the power to damn souls - and it’s getting out of control. Her boyfriend, Driggs, is dead - sort of. She’s a fugitive, on the run from the maniacal new mayor of Croak and the townspeople who want to see her pay the price for her misdeeds. Uncle Mort rounds up the Junior Grims to flee Croak once again, but this time they’re joined by Grotton, the most powerful Grim of all time. Their new mission is clear: Fix his mistakes, or the Afterlife will cease to exist, along with all the souls in it.

Contrary to popular opinion, vampires are not sexy, romantic, or powerful. In case you hadn’t noticed, vampires are dead. And the only ones who don’t get staked are the ones who avoid attacking people, admit they have a problem, and join a support group. Just ask Nina Harrison - fanged at 15, and still living with her mother. She hasn’t aged since 1973, and the highlight of her sickly, couch-bound life is probably her Tuesday-night group meeting, which she spends with a miserable bunch of fellow sufferers, being lectured at.

The truck should have turned Libbi Piper into a Libbi Pancake - and it would have, too, if Aaron hadn't shown up and saved her life. The problem? Aaron's the local Grim Reaper - and he only saved Libbi's life because he needs someone to take over his job. Now, Libbi has two days to choose between dying like she was supposed to, or living a lonely life as Death Incarnate. Talk about a rock and a hard place.

Charlie Grant’s older sister is getting married this weekend at their family home, and Charlie can’t wait - for the first time in years, all four of her older siblings will be under one roof. Charlie is desperate for one last perfect weekend before the house is sold and everything changes. The house will be filled with jokes and games and laughs again. Making decisions about things like what college to attend and reuniting with longstanding crush Jesse Foster - all that can wait. She wants to focus on making the weekend perfect.

Sound the Cosmic Horn for best-selling author Louise Rennison’s ninth book of the confessions of crazy but loveable teenager Georgia Nicolson!Now that Georgia has finally won over gorgey Masimo, the Italian Stallion, her old friend and lip-nibbling partner Dave the Laugh has popped up again. Will Georgia go to Pizza-a-gogo land to visit dreamy Masimo? Or could her perfect boy be closer than she thinks. A Sex Kitty’s life is never simple…More hilarious confessions.

After an eventful freshman year and a disastrous summer, fifteen-year-old Will Carter returns to Merrian High none the wiser. The year starts off pretty normally. He’s back on the football field (the bench area of the field). He and his boys start a fight club to defend themselves against Scary Terry Moss, who is out of juvie and hunting Carter. And he goes to homecoming again with Amber Lee.

In the small town of Ealing, Iowa, Austin and his best friend, Robby, have accidentally unleashed an unstoppable army. An army of horny, hungry, six-foot-tall praying mantises that only want to do two things. This is the truth. This is history. It’s the end of the world. And nobody knows anything about it. You know what I mean. Funny, intense, complex, and brave, Grasshopper Jungle brilliantly weaves together everything from testicle-dissolving genetically modified corn to the struggles of recession-era, small-town America in this groundbreaking coming-of-age stunner.

101 Hilarious Jokes is a funny collection of clean one-liners, silly puns, and dad jokes. Perfect for family nights and road and plane trips. Try not to laugh! Appropriate for kids, teens, and adults.

Seventeen-year-old Esme Pearl has a babysitters club. She knows it's kinda lame, but what else is she supposed to do? Get a job? Gross. Besides, Esme likes babysitting, and she's good at it. And lately Esme needs all the cash she can get, because it seems like destruction follows her wherever she goes. Let's just say she owes some people a new tree. Enter Cassandra Heaven. She's Instagram-model hot, dresses like she found her clothes in a dumpster, and has a rebellious streak as gnarly as the cafeteria cooking.

It s Belfast, 1977. The King is dead and a 14-year-old boy wearing Denim aftershave has just been appointed breadboy in the last Ormo Mini-Shop in the world, delivering bread to the residents of the Upper Shankill on Saturday mornings. He s all grown up now, so he is, and nearly shaving. The Bee Gees fill the airwaves, everyone is in love with Princess Leia, and Breadboy s love of peace and pets is soon rivalled by his interest in parallel universes and punk...and girls, especially Judy Carlton who sits opposite him in chemistry.

Seventeen-year-old Zelda Bailey-Cho has her future all planned out: improv camp, then Second City, and finally Saturday Night Live. She’s thrilled when she lands a spot on the coveted varsity team at a prestigious improv camp, which means she’ll get to perform for professional scouts - including her hero, Nina Knightley. But even though she’s hardworking and talented, Zelda’s also the only girl, so she’s a target for humiliation from her teammates. And her 20-year-old coach Ben is cruel to her at practice and way too nice to her when they’re alone....

It's 1991, and John "Spud" Milton's journey to manhood is still creeping along at a snail's pace. Nearly 15, Spud's starting his second year at boarding school and - to his utter mortification - he's still a spud! To make things worse, his dorm mates, the legendary Crazy Eight, have an unusual new member (Roger the cat), and his house is home to a new batch of unruly first-years. Spud is soon plagued with women trouble, coerced into expulsion-worthy adventures, and frustrated to find his dreams of fame in tatters after a disastrous production of Noah's Ark.

From Paralympic ski racer and YouTube star, Josh Sundquist, comes an always-funny (and sometimes-awkward) memoir about teenage misadventures. When I was 25 years old, it came to my attention that I had never had a girlfriend. At the time, I was actually under the impression that I was in a relationship, so this bit of news came as something of a shock. Why was Josh still single? To find out, he tracked down each of the girls he had tried to date since middle school and asked them straight up: What went wrong? The results of Josh's semiscientific investigation are in your hands.

The impossible was just the beginning. Now in their second year as superhuman government weapons-in-training at the Pentagonal Spire, Tom and his friends are midlevel cadets in the elite combat corps known as the Intrasolar Forces. But as training intensifies and a moment arrives that could make or break his entire career, Tom's loyalties are again put to the test. Will his idealism and bravado cost him everything - and everyone - that matters to him?

Things not to do when you find out you’re a wizard: 1. Do not destroy your apartment with magical fire. You WILL NOT get the security deposit back. 2. Do not form an alliance with the guy who is trying to murder you. This will end badly. 3. Do not drag the girl you’re desperately in love with into your wizard mess. You risk her watching you fail miserably. 4. Under no circumstances should you get in the middle of an epic magical battle. Death will happen. Lots of death and bad things.