Women Humor

Eleanor knows she's a mess. But today she will tackle the little things. She will shower and get dressed. She will have her poetry and yoga lessons after dropping off her son, Timby. She won't swear. She will initiate sex with her husband, Joe. But before she can put her modest plan into action - life happens. Today, it turns out, is the day Timby has decided to fake sick to weasel his way into his mother's company. It's also the day Joe has chosen to tell his office - but not Eleanor - that he's on vacation.

When Laura Costello moves to Los Angeles, trying to escape an overprotective family and the haunting memories of a terrible accident, she doesn’t expect to be homeless after a week. (She’s pretty sure she didn’t start that fire—right?) She also doesn't expect to find herself adopted by a rogue bookseller, installed in a lovely but completely illegal boardinghouse, or challenged to save a losing trivia team from ignominy…but that’s what happens.

Valencia, a timid debt collector with crippling OCD, is afraid of many things, but the two that scare her most are flying and turning thirty-five. To confront those fears, Valencia’s therapist suggests that she fly somewhere - anywhere - before her upcoming birthday. And as Valencia begins a telephone romance with a man from New York, she suddenly has a destination in mind. There’s only one problem - he might not actually exist.

It's never too late to change the habits of a lifetime... Evelyn Pringle isn't the sort to make rash decisions. Or any decisions, really – she's always left that sort of thing up to her husband. But he's been found dead, wearing his best suit, with a diamond ring in his pocket that doesn't fit her. When Evelyn finds a letter addressed to a woman on the Isle of Wight, she decides to deliver it. By hand. So begins a very unusual holiday, and an adventure no one could have predicted – least of all Evelyn herself.

Betsy Taylor needs a job and amazingly lands the perfect one: selling designer shoes at Macy's. But the other vamps, including sexy Sinclair, don't want their queen selling shoes. And the vampire hunters are becoming a real pain, murdering innocent vampires. It seems that everyone wants something from Betsy.

When a mysterious text message summons May Wexler to a biker bar in downtown New Orleans, she knows something is very wrong. Her sister has sent out an SOS, but when May gets there, she's nowhere to be found and May is the one in trouble - she's wearing pink espadrilles, she's got a Chihuahua in her purse, and she's in the middle of a shootout.

It's 1985, and at Oxford University, Pimm's, punting, and ball gowns are de rigeur. Ursula Flowerbutton, a studious country girl, arrives for her first term anticipating nothing more sinister than days spent poring over history books in gilded libraries - and, if she's lucky, an invitation to a ball. But when she discovers a glamorous classmate on a chaise longue with her throat cut, Ursula is catapulted into a murder investigation.

Julia hasn't had sex in three years. Her roommate has a boyfriend - and their sex noises are audible through the walls, maybe even throughout the neighborhood. Not to mention, she's treading water in a dead-end job, her know-it-all therapist gives her advice she doesn't ask for, and the men she is surrounded by are, to be polite, subpar.

Addison Holmes is at it again. When priceless Russian gems are stolen on their way to Savannah and the courier is murdered, all the clues lead back to an escort service that seems above reproach. But looks can be deceiving. Throw in a sexy detective and a dangerous FBI agent, and Addison finds out very quickly that she's in way over her head. But nothing is going to stop her from getting her man.

The Cows is a powerful novel about three women. In all the noise of modern life, each needs to find her own voice. It's about friendship and being female. It's bold and brilliant. It's searingly perceptive. It's about never following the herd. And everyone is going to be talking about it.

If you could repeat one year of your life, what would you do differently? This heartwarming and hilarious novel features three best friends who get the chance to return to the year they turned 40, the year that altered all of their lives in ways big and small - and get the opportunity to change their future. But it doesn't take long for all three women to learn that reliving a life and making different decisions leads only to new problems and consequences and that the mistakes they made may in fact have been the best choices.

It's 1947. War's over, cherry-print dresses, parking above the city lights, swing dancing. Beautiful, 17-year-old Violet lives in a perfect world. Everybody loves her. In 2012, she's still beautiful, charming, and surrounded by admirers. Veronica "Ronni" Johnson, licensed practical nurse and aspiring writer, meets the captivating Violet in the assisted living facility where Violet requires no assistance, just lots of male attention. When she dies, she leaves Ronni a very generous bequest - only if Ronni completes a book about her life within one year.

Natalie is a Bloomingdale's salesgirl mooning over her lawyer ex-boyfriend, who's engaged to someone else after just two months. Felicia has been quietly in love with her boss for 17 years and has one night to finally make the feeling mutual. Andie is a private detective who specializes in gathering evidence on cheating husbands - a skill she unfortunately learned from her own life - and lands a case that may restore her faith in true love.

The second novel from Laura Dave, the acclaimed author of Eight Hundred Grapes and Hello Sunshine. In The Divorce Party, captures a much-discussed cultural phenomenon that has never been profiled in fiction before - divorce celebrations - with her characteristic wit and warmth. Set in Hamptons high society, The Divorce Party features two women - one newly engaged and one at the end of her marriage - trying to answer the same question: When should you fight to save a relationship, and when should you let go?

Click your heels three times and say, "There's no place like Bloomies!" Katie Chandler's life is pure magic - literally. As an executive assistant at Magic, Spells, and Illusions, Inc., she's seen more than her share of fantastical occurrences. A mere Manhattan mortal, Katie is no wizard, but she's a wiz at exposing "hokum" pocus, cloaked lies, and deceptive enchantments. And she's fallen under the all-too-human spell of attraction to Owen, a hunky wizard and coworker. Owen, however, is preoccupied. Someone has broken into his office and disrupted top-secret files, and it reeks of an inside job.

Christmas in Caerphilly is wonderful! Unless you’re a Canadian whose inconsiderate boss is forcing you to spend the holiday there, far from family and friends, with only a slim chance of a white Christmas. Meg already has her hands full, trying to make the season festive for the dozen programmers who are staying with her and Michael while working on a rush project with her brother’s software company. At least it’s an interesting project, since the Canadian company is doing forensic genealogy and DNA analysis. But when the boss is found murdered, there are too many suspects.

Henry has ended his marriage to Caroline and headed off to Noosa with Mercedes' grade three teacher, Martha. Caroline, having shredded a wardrobe-full of Henry's suits, has gone after them. Craig and Lesley have dropped over briefly from next door to catch up on the fallout from Henry and Caroline's all-night row. And Janice, Caroline's sister, is staying for the weekend to look after the girls because Janice is the sensible one.

The morning of her niece's wedding, Margo Just drinks a double martini and contemplates the many mistakes she's made in her fifty-odd years of life. Spending three decades in love with a wonderful but unattainable man is pretty high up on her list of missteps, as is a long line of unsuccessful love affairs accompanied by a seemingly endless supply of delicious cocktails.

Lottie just knows that her boyfriend is going to propose during lunch at one of London’s fanciest restaurants. But when his big question involves a trip abroad, not a trip down the aisle, she’s completely crushed. So when Ben, an old flame, calls her out of the blue and reminds Lottie of their pact to get married if they were both still single at 30, she jumps at the chance. No formal dates - just a quick march to the altar and a honeymoon on Ikonos, the sun-drenched Greek island where they first met years ago. Their family and friends are horrified. Fliss, Lottie’s older sister, knows that Lottie can be impulsive - but surely this is her worst decision yet.

For Duffy Sinclair, life boils down to one simple thing: maintaining his residence at the idyllic Centennial Assisted Living. Without it, he’s destined for the roach-infested nursing home down the road. So, he keeps his shenanigans to the bare minimum with the help of his straight-laced best friend and roommate, Carl Upton. But when Carl’s granddaughter Josie climbs through their bedroom window with booze on her breath and a black eye, Duffy’s faced with trouble that’s sticking around and hard to hide.