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  • Assume the Worst

  • The Graduation Speech You'll Never Hear
  • Written by: Carl Hiaasen
  • Narrated by: Carl Hiaasen
  • Length: 15 mins
  • 4.0 out of 5 stars (1 rating)

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Assume the Worst

Written by: Carl Hiaasen
Narrated by: Carl Hiaasen
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Publisher's Summary

This is Oh, the Places You'll Never Go - the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate's future. And what he or she can or can't do about it.

"This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That's not what you need. You need a warning."

So begins Carl Hiaasen's attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after hearing Assume the Worst, is: Nobody. Following the format of Anna Quindlen's commencement address (Being Perfect) and George Saunders's commencement address (Congratulations, by the way), this might look typical from the outside, but inside it is anything but.

This book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it's also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.

©2018 Carl Hiaasen (P)2018 Random House Audio
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