How to Know a Person
The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wish list failed.
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
Buy Now for $26.22
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
David Brooks
-
Written by:
-
David Brooks
About this listen
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A practical, heartfelt guide to the art of truly knowing another person in order to foster deeper connections at home, at work, and throughout our lives—from the author of The Road to Character and The Second Mountain
“More than a guide to better conversations, it’s a blueprint for a more connected and humane way of living. It’s a must-read for anyone looking to deepen their relationships and broaden their perspectives.”—Bill Gates, GatesNotes (Summer Reading Pick)
As David Brooks observes, “There is one skill that lies at the heart of any healthy person, family, school, community organization, or society: the ability to see someone else deeply and make them feel seen—to accurately know another person, to let them feel valued, heard, and understood.”
And yet we humans don’t do this well. All around us are people who feel invisible, unseen, misunderstood. In How to Know a Person, Brooks sets out to help us do better, posing questions that are essential for all of us: If you want to know a person, what kind of attention should you cast on them? What kind of conversations should you have? What parts of a person’s story should you pay attention to?
Driven by his trademark sense of curiosity and his determination to grow as a person, Brooks draws from the fields of psychology and neuroscience and from the worlds of theater, philosophy, history, and education to present a welcoming, hopeful, integrated approach to human connection. How to Know a Person helps readers become more understanding and considerate toward others, and to find the joy that comes from being seen. Along the way it offers a possible remedy for a society that is riven by fragmentation, hostility, and misperception.
The act of seeing another person, Brooks argues, is profoundly creative: How can we look somebody in the eye and see something large in them, and in turn, see something larger in ourselves? How to Know a Person is for anyone searching for connection, and yearning to be understood.
You may also enjoy...
-
Infectious Generosity
- The Ultimate Idea Worth Spreading
- Written by: Chris Anderson
- Narrated by: Chris Anderson
- Length: 6 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Let’s face it: Recent years have been tough on optimists. Hopes that the Internet might bring people together have been crushed by the ills of social media. Is there a way back? As head of TED, Chris Anderson has had a ringside view of the world’s boldest thinkers sharing their most uplifting ideas. Inspired by them, he believes that it’s within our grasp to turn outrage back into optimism. It all comes down to reimagining one of the most fundamental human virtues: generosity. What if generosity could become infectious generosity?
Written by: Chris Anderson
-
Brave New Words
- How AI Will Revolutionize Education (and Why That's a Good Thing)
- Written by: Salman Khan
- Narrated by: Salman Khan
- Length: 6 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Whether we like it or not, the AI revolution is coming to education. In Brave New Words, Salman Khan, the visionary behind Khan Academy, explores how artificial intelligence and GPT technology will transform learning, and offers a road map for teachers, parents, and students to navigate this exciting (and sometimes intimidating) new world. A pioneer in the field of education technology, Khan examines the ins and outs of these cutting-edge tools and how they will revolutionize the way we learn and teach.
-
-
Vapid
- By Wes on 2024-12-09
Written by: Salman Khan
-
The Second Mountain
- How People Move from the Prison of Self to the Joy of Commitment
- Written by: David Brooks
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey
- Length: 12 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Author David Brooks explores the four commitments that define a life of meaning and purpose: to a spouse and family, to a vocation, to a philosophy or faith, and to a community. Our personal fulfillment depends on how well we choose and execute these commitments. Brooks looks at a range of people who have lived joyous, committed lives, and who have embraced the necessity and beauty of dependence. He gathers their wisdom on how to choose a partner, how to pick a vocation, how to live out a philosophy, and how we can begin to integrate our commitments into one overriding purpose.
-
-
Not what I expected at all
- By Angela Bailey on 2023-10-28
Written by: David Brooks
-
The Road to Character
- Written by: David Brooks
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey, David Brooks
- Length: 12 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Looking to some of the world's greatest thinkers and inspiring leaders, Brooks explores how, through internal struggle and a sense of their own limitations, they have built a strong inner character. Labor activist Frances Perkins understood the need to suppress parts of herself so that she could be an instrument in a larger cause. Dwight Eisenhower organized his life not around impulsive self-expression but considered self-restraint.
-
-
Not sure what I was expecting...
- By Amazon Customer on 2019-04-10
Written by: David Brooks
-
Hidden Potential
- The Science of Achieving Greater Things
- Written by: Adam Grant
- Narrated by: Adam Grant, Maurice Ashley, R. A. Dickey, and others
- Length: 7 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
We live in a world that’s obsessed with talent. We celebrate gifted students in school, natural athletes in sports, and child prodigies in music. But admiring people who start out with innate advantages leads us to overlook the distance we ourselves can travel. We underestimate the range of skills that we can learn and how good we can become. We can all improve at improving. And when opportunity doesn’t knock, there are ways to build a door.
-
-
Didn’t finish
- By S on 2023-12-18
Written by: Adam Grant
-
The Social Animal
- The Hidden Sources of Love, Character, and Achievement
- Written by: David Brooks
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey
- Length: 16 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
With unequaled insight and brio, David Brooks, the New York Times columnist and bestselling author of Bobos in Paradise, has long explored and explained the way we live. Now, with the intellectual curiosity and emotional wisdom that make his columns among the most read in the nation, Brooks turns to the building blocks of human flourishing in a multilayered, profoundly illuminating work grounded in everyday life.
-
-
a deeply introspective story of life
- By Orrin farries on 2024-09-28
Written by: David Brooks
-
Infectious Generosity
- The Ultimate Idea Worth Spreading
- Written by: Chris Anderson
- Narrated by: Chris Anderson
- Length: 6 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Let’s face it: Recent years have been tough on optimists. Hopes that the Internet might bring people together have been crushed by the ills of social media. Is there a way back? As head of TED, Chris Anderson has had a ringside view of the world’s boldest thinkers sharing their most uplifting ideas. Inspired by them, he believes that it’s within our grasp to turn outrage back into optimism. It all comes down to reimagining one of the most fundamental human virtues: generosity. What if generosity could become infectious generosity?
Written by: Chris Anderson
-
Brave New Words
- How AI Will Revolutionize Education (and Why That's a Good Thing)
- Written by: Salman Khan
- Narrated by: Salman Khan
- Length: 6 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Whether we like it or not, the AI revolution is coming to education. In Brave New Words, Salman Khan, the visionary behind Khan Academy, explores how artificial intelligence and GPT technology will transform learning, and offers a road map for teachers, parents, and students to navigate this exciting (and sometimes intimidating) new world. A pioneer in the field of education technology, Khan examines the ins and outs of these cutting-edge tools and how they will revolutionize the way we learn and teach.
-
-
Vapid
- By Wes on 2024-12-09
Written by: Salman Khan
-
The Second Mountain
- How People Move from the Prison of Self to the Joy of Commitment
- Written by: David Brooks
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey
- Length: 12 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Author David Brooks explores the four commitments that define a life of meaning and purpose: to a spouse and family, to a vocation, to a philosophy or faith, and to a community. Our personal fulfillment depends on how well we choose and execute these commitments. Brooks looks at a range of people who have lived joyous, committed lives, and who have embraced the necessity and beauty of dependence. He gathers their wisdom on how to choose a partner, how to pick a vocation, how to live out a philosophy, and how we can begin to integrate our commitments into one overriding purpose.
-
-
Not what I expected at all
- By Angela Bailey on 2023-10-28
Written by: David Brooks
-
The Road to Character
- Written by: David Brooks
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey, David Brooks
- Length: 12 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Looking to some of the world's greatest thinkers and inspiring leaders, Brooks explores how, through internal struggle and a sense of their own limitations, they have built a strong inner character. Labor activist Frances Perkins understood the need to suppress parts of herself so that she could be an instrument in a larger cause. Dwight Eisenhower organized his life not around impulsive self-expression but considered self-restraint.
-
-
Not sure what I was expecting...
- By Amazon Customer on 2019-04-10
Written by: David Brooks
-
Hidden Potential
- The Science of Achieving Greater Things
- Written by: Adam Grant
- Narrated by: Adam Grant, Maurice Ashley, R. A. Dickey, and others
- Length: 7 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
We live in a world that’s obsessed with talent. We celebrate gifted students in school, natural athletes in sports, and child prodigies in music. But admiring people who start out with innate advantages leads us to overlook the distance we ourselves can travel. We underestimate the range of skills that we can learn and how good we can become. We can all improve at improving. And when opportunity doesn’t knock, there are ways to build a door.
-
-
Didn’t finish
- By S on 2023-12-18
Written by: Adam Grant
-
The Social Animal
- The Hidden Sources of Love, Character, and Achievement
- Written by: David Brooks
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey
- Length: 16 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
With unequaled insight and brio, David Brooks, the New York Times columnist and bestselling author of Bobos in Paradise, has long explored and explained the way we live. Now, with the intellectual curiosity and emotional wisdom that make his columns among the most read in the nation, Brooks turns to the building blocks of human flourishing in a multilayered, profoundly illuminating work grounded in everyday life.
-
-
a deeply introspective story of life
- By Orrin farries on 2024-09-28
Written by: David Brooks
-
Supercommunicators
- How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection
- Written by: Charles Duhigg
- Narrated by: Charles Duhigg
- Length: 7 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Come inside a jury room as one juror leads a starkly divided room to consensus. Join a young CIA officer as he recruits a reluctant foreign agent. And sit with an accomplished surgeon as he tries, and fails, to convince yet another cancer patient to opt for the less risky course of treatment. In Supercommunicators, Charles Duhigg blends deep research and his trademark storytelling skills to show how we can all learn to identify and leverage the hidden layers that lurk beneath every conversation.
-
-
Good info, but the covid/vax section didn't age well.
- By Sam on 2024-06-12
Written by: Charles Duhigg
-
You're Not Listening
- What You're Missing and Why It Matters
- Written by: Kate Murphy
- Narrated by: Kate Murphy
- Length: 6 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
At work, we’re taught to lead the conversation. On social media, we shape our personal narratives. At parties, we talk over one another. So do our politicians. We’re not listening. And no one is listening to us. Despite living in a world where technology allows constant digital communication and opportunities to connect, it seems no one is really listening or even knows how. And it’s making us lonelier, more isolated, and less tolerant than ever before. A listener by trade, New York Times contributor Kate Murphy wanted to know how we got here.
-
-
Provoking
- By Amanda Voeltz on 2021-08-30
Written by: Kate Murphy
-
The Coming Wave
- Technology, Power, and the Twenty-First Century's Greatest Dilemma
- Written by: Mustafa Suleyman, Michael Bhaskar - contributor
- Narrated by: Mustafa Suleyman
- Length: 11 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
We are approaching a critical threshold in the history of our species. Everything is about to change. Soon you will live surrounded by AIs. They will organize your life, operate your business, and run core government services. You will live in a world of DNA printers and quantum computers, engineered pathogens and autonomous weapons, robot assistants and abundant energy.
-
-
An AI MUST READ
- By Aylan C on 2024-04-28
Written by: Mustafa Suleyman, and others
-
Slow Productivity
- The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout
- Written by: Cal Newport
- Narrated by: Cal Newport
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Our current definition of “productivity” is broken. It pushes us to treat busyness as a proxy for useful effort, leading to impossibly lengthy task lists and ceaseless meetings. We’re overwhelmed by all we have to do and on the edge of burnout, left to decide between giving into soul-sapping hustle culture or rejecting ambition altogether. But are these really our only choices?
-
-
Mehh
- By G on 2024-06-27
Written by: Cal Newport
-
The Art of Empathy
- A Training Course in Life's Most Essential Skill
- Written by: Karla McLaren
- Narrated by: Karla McLaren
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Some of us are natural-born empaths - those with an exceptional gift for feeling and understanding the emotions, circumstances, and needs of others. But empathy, teaches Karla McLaren, is a universal human skill that we can all learn to awaken and use wisely. With The Art of Empathy, you will learn, step-by-step, the art of experiencing through the eyes and hearts of those around you - and to connect with and support them most effectively.
-
-
Key Learning for Being a Human
- By Carole Fischer on 2021-01-28
Written by: Karla McLaren
-
My Plan for Living to 156
- Imaginatively Extend Your Lifetime to Transform How You Live in The Present
- Written by: Dan Sullivan
- Narrated by: Dan Sullivan
- Length: 2 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Most people’s notion about how long they’re going to live is an oppressive thought. They feel confined by a certain number of years, an age expectation based on family history and averages. But what if you could extend your lifetime? How would adding extra years impact the way you live now? Dan Sullivan's goal of living to 156 may sound outrageous at the outset. But you’ll soon find that the imagination can have a huge impact on your behavior, and a simple mindset shift can literally change every thought you think.
Written by: Dan Sullivan
-
Age of Revolutions
- Progress and Backlash from 1600 to the Present
- Written by: Fareed Zakaria
- Narrated by: Fareed Zakaria
- Length: 13 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Populist rage, ideological fracture, economic and technological shocks, geopolitical dangers, and an international system studded with catastrophic risk—the early decades of the 21st century may be one of the most revolutionary periods in modern history. But they are not the first. Humans have lived, and thrived, through more than one great realignment. What makes an age a revolutionary one? And how do they end?
-
-
...a 10-year study, with 100+ years of history..
- By Nel on 2024-06-11
Written by: Fareed Zakaria
-
The Identity Trap
- A Story of Ideas and Power in Our Time
- Written by: Yascha Mounk
- Narrated by: JD Jackson
- Length: 11 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For much of history, societies have violently oppressed ethnic, religious, and sexual minorities. It is no surprise that many who passionately believe in social justice came to believe that members of marginalized groups need to take pride in their identity to resist injustice.
-
-
Absolutely On The Button
- By Nick on 2023-11-23
Written by: Yascha Mounk
-
The Laws of Lifetime Growth
- Always Make Your Future Bigger than Your Past
- Written by: Dan Sullivan, Catherine Nomura
- Narrated by: Jeff Hoyt
- Length: 2 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Growth is a fundamental human need. It is at the root of everything that gives us a feeling of accomplishment, satisfaction, meaning, and progress. Yet many people find their growth stalled at some point. In The Laws of Lifetime Growth, Dan Sullivan and Catherine Nomura offer 10 simple laws that everyone can use to keep a fresh, innovative perspective on their lives and the world around them.
-
-
One to listen to every month!
- By Aaron D'Souza on 2020-11-07
Written by: Dan Sullivan, and others
-
The Soul of Civility
- Timeless Principles to Heal Society and Ourselves
- Written by: Alexandra Hudson
- Narrated by: Alexandra Hudson
- Length: 12 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Alexandra Hudson, daughter of the "Manners Lady," was raised to respect others. But as she grew up, Hudson discovered a difference between politeness―a superficial appearance of good manners―and true civility. In this timely book, Hudson sheds light on how civility can help bridge our political divide.
Written by: Alexandra Hudson
-
The Lives We Actually Have
- 100 Blessings for Imperfect Days
- Written by: Kate Bowler, Jessica Richie
- Narrated by: Kate Bowler, Jessica Richie
- Length: 3 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
We live in a world that demands relentless perfection. Happy marriages and easy friendships. Bucket list–level adventures and matching family photos. But what if our actual lives don’t feel very #blessed? Might our everyday existence be worthy of a blessing too? Even an average Tuesday?
-
-
Will listen again and again
- By Amazon Customer on 2023-05-09
Written by: Kate Bowler, and others
-
Testimony
- Inside the Evangelical Movement That Failed a Generation
- Written by: Jon Ward
- Narrated by: Jon Ward
- Length: 7 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Jon Ward's life is divided in half: two decades inside the evangelical Christian bubble and two decades outside of it. In Testimony, Ward tells the engaging story of his upbringing in, and eventual break from, an influential evangelical church in the 1980s and 1990s. Ward sheds light on the evangelical movement's troubling political and cultural dimensions, tracing the ways in which the Jesus People movement was seduced by materialism and other factors to become politically captive rather than prophetic.
-
-
Great book
- By Devon on 2023-11-16
Written by: Jon Ward
What listeners say about How to Know a Person
Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Micah Clark
- 2024-06-20
A tender discussion of knowing
A generous, open hearted discourse on what it means to know and be known. I've read a lot of David Brooks, and this is quite different. The Road to Character was a bit grim, but this is hopeful and vulnerable. Great narration and a genuinely life changing mission.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Anonymous User
- 2024-04-29
Good overview in (mostly) plain language
A thoughtful reflection on the application of behavioral techniques to build stronger relationships, applicable in a post-Covid context. Some good anecdotes and insights into the intersection of social capital, politics, and civic and social trust. I am impressed at how the author mostly stayed away from weighted terms like "empathy" but worked in the concepts even so.
I found the work to be a bit light on peer reviewed research (which is something I tend to look for in volumes like this) but having read a lot of the cannon, in my view the book offers a reasoned interpretation, in most cases. It might benefit from further exploration of the techniques and practices around attachment theory and the processing of difficult or traumatic memories and how that can impact interactions and relationships in ways different than the framework offered here.
All told, would read again.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Kfreeont
- 2024-02-23
A Warm Guiding Probe
I loved how this book provided so many stories and examples that I could not help but see myself in my entirety.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Dave Wong
- 2024-07-24
Worth listening to again
Brooks' insights and reflections are things we can take directly into our lives to build deeper connections with those around us and truly know people and be known.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Ashiq Chowdhury
- 2024-03-18
Great book on people
Liked the narrative and flow of the book. Very insightful! I would recommend this to all who are struggling to connect with others. Overall, a very well written and informative book on people.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Hazel
- 2024-03-27
A must read
Absolutely love the writing. Highly recommend this important book. Thank you so much David Brooks.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Amie
- 2024-04-01
This book has good information, people with BPD beware.
What bothers me is that this book could be so good for people with borderline personality disorder to read in order to help them. Except that the author spends a bit of time casually dunking on people with BPD as if the disorder is a monolith and as if managed BPD doesn't exist and isn't possible.
Makes it hard to suggest it to others.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
2 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Elizabeth
- 2023-11-28
Honesty
Well researched, illuminating information written with tremendous compassion. Thank you for sharing your wisdom journey.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- JDesormeaux
- 2024-01-07
Outstanding
I have ordered the book and the workbook. Highly recommend this book to all manner of people
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Beconan
- 2023-12-05
Listen more and talk less
I like the wisdom we we can learn as we grow more mature Very important topic in a divided world Hopefully many people will read and learn
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful