How to Murder Your Life
A Memoir
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How to Murder Your Life
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Narrated by:
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Cat Marnell
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Written by:
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Cat Marnell
About this listen
From Cat Marnell, "New York's enfant terrible" (The Telegraph), a candid and darkly humorous memoir of prescription drug addiction and self-sabotage, set in the glamorous world of fashion magazines and downtown nightclubs.
At 26 Cat Marnell was an associate beauty editor at Lucky, one of the top fashion magazines in America - and that's all most people knew about her. But she hid a secret life. She was a prescription drug addict. She was also a "doctor shopper" who manipulated Upper East Side psychiatrists for pills, pills, and more pills; a lonely bulimic who spent hundreds of dollars a week on binge foods; a promiscuous party girl who danced barefoot on banquets; a weepy and hallucination-prone insomniac who would take anything - anything - to sleep.
This is a tale of self-loathing, self-sabotage, and, yes, self-tanner. It begins at a posh New England prep school - and with a prescription for attention deficit disorder medication Ritalin. It continues to New York, where we follow Marnell's amphetamine-fueled rise from intern to editor through the beauty departments of NYLON, Teen Vogue, Glamour, and Lucky. We see her fight between ambition and addiction and how, inevitably, her disease threatens everything she worked so hard to achieve.
From the Conde Nast building (where she rides the elevator alongside Anna Wintour) to seedy nightclubs, from doctors' offices and mental hospitals, Marnell shows - like no one else can - what it is like to live in the wild, chaotic, often sinister world of a young female addict who can't say no.
Combining lightning-rod subject matter and bold literary aspirations, How to Murder Your Life is mesmerizing, revelatory, and necessary.
©2017 Cat Marnell (P)2017 Simon & Schuster, Inc.You may also enjoy...
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Self-Tanner for the Soul
- How I Ran Away to Europe and Found My Inner Glow (When Life Got Dark)
- Written by: Cat Marnell
- Narrated by: Cat Marnell
- Length: 6 hrs
- Original Recording
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 49
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 44
-
Story3.5 out of 5 stars 43
The spring of 2017 should have been the greatest time of Cat Marnell’s life. She was 34 and living the New York glamour life downtown, with a thriving career and a best-selling memoir. Instead, it was one of the worst. She’d gone through a protracted and traumatic breakup, nearly run out of money, and, during a month-long binge, "done something horrible" to herself that she couldn’t undo. Her troubles mounting, Marnell makes a radically simple choice: She decides to leave her problems behind.
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1 out of 5 stars
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a 34 year old behaves like she's 18
- By Anonymous User on 2020-05-12
Written by: Cat Marnell
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Blackout
- Remembering the Things I Drank to Forget
- Written by: Sarah Hepola
- Narrated by: Sarah Hepola
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 129
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 112
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 111
A memoir of unblinking honesty and poignant, laugh-out-loud humor, Blackout is the story of a woman stumbling into a new kind of adventure - the sober life she never wanted. For Sarah Hepola, alcohol was "the gasoline of all adventure". She spent her evenings at cocktail parties and dark bars where she proudly stayed till last call. But there was a price. Publicly, she covered her shame with self-deprecating jokes, and her career flourished, but as the blackouts accumulated, she could no longer avoid a sinking truth.
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5 out of 5 stars
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yes! finally! something relatable
- By Jennifer A on 2021-07-16
Written by: Sarah Hepola
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Between Breaths
- A Memoir of Panic and Addiction
- Written by: Elizabeth Vargas
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Vargas
- Length: 5 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 36
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 28
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Story5 out of 5 stars 28
Beloved former ABC 20/20 anchor Elizabeth Vargas reveals her alcohol addiction and anxiety disorder in a shockingly honest and emotional memoir. From the moment she uttered the brave and honest words, "I am an alcoholic," to interviewer George Stephanopoulos, Elizabeth Vargas began writing her story, as her experiences were still raw. Now, in Between Breaths, Vargas discusses her accounts of growing up with anxiety—which began suddenly at the age of six when her father served in Vietnam.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great !!
- By Anonymous User on 2023-01-04
Written by: Elizabeth Vargas
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Playground
- A Childhood Lost Inside the Playboy Mansion
- Written by: Jennifer Saginor
- Narrated by: Kassidy Cortese
- Length: 6 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 9
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Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 8
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 8
In the vein of Running with Scissors, Playground is the glitzy, glamorous, and surreal true story of a young girl who grew up inside the Playboy Mansion and never learned where the party stopped and the real world began. You are six years old. Every day after school your father takes you to a sprawling castle filled with exotic animals, bowls of candy, and half-naked women catering to your every need. You have your own room. You have new friends. You have an uncle Hef who's always there for you.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Pointless
- By Sheena on 2024-11-12
Written by: Jennifer Saginor
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Down the Drain
- Written by: Julia Fox
- Narrated by: Julia Fox
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 210
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 188
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Story5 out of 5 stars 189
Julia Fox is famous for many things: her captivating acting, such as her breakout role in the film Uncut Gems; her trendsetting style, including bleached eyebrows, exaggerated eyeshadow, and cutout dresses; her mastery of social media, where she entertains and educates her millions of followers. But all these share the trait for which she is most famous: unabashedly and unapologetically being herself. This commitment to authenticity has never been more on display than in Down the Drain. With writing that is both eloquent and accessible, Fox recounts her turbulent path to cultural supremacy.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I’ve never felt more empowerment going into my 30’s
- By carly on 2023-12-12
Written by: Julia Fox
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Glorious Rock Bottom
- Written by: Bryony Gordon
- Narrated by: Bryony Gordon
- Length: 5 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 6
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 6
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 6
Bryony Gordon is a respected journalist, a number one best-selling author and an award-winning mental health campaigner. She is also an alcoholic. In Glorious Rock Bottom Bryony opens up about a toxic 20-year relationship with alcohol and drugs and explains exactly why hitting rock bottom - for her, a traumatic event and the abrupt realisation that she was putting herself in danger, time and again - saved her life.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
good listen
- By AM on 2023-05-07
Written by: Bryony Gordon
-
Self-Tanner for the Soul
- How I Ran Away to Europe and Found My Inner Glow (When Life Got Dark)
- Written by: Cat Marnell
- Narrated by: Cat Marnell
- Length: 6 hrs
- Original Recording
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 49
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 44
-
Story3.5 out of 5 stars 43
The spring of 2017 should have been the greatest time of Cat Marnell’s life. She was 34 and living the New York glamour life downtown, with a thriving career and a best-selling memoir. Instead, it was one of the worst. She’d gone through a protracted and traumatic breakup, nearly run out of money, and, during a month-long binge, "done something horrible" to herself that she couldn’t undo. Her troubles mounting, Marnell makes a radically simple choice: She decides to leave her problems behind.
-
1 out of 5 stars
-
a 34 year old behaves like she's 18
- By Anonymous User on 2020-05-12
Written by: Cat Marnell
-
Blackout
- Remembering the Things I Drank to Forget
- Written by: Sarah Hepola
- Narrated by: Sarah Hepola
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 129
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 112
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 111
A memoir of unblinking honesty and poignant, laugh-out-loud humor, Blackout is the story of a woman stumbling into a new kind of adventure - the sober life she never wanted. For Sarah Hepola, alcohol was "the gasoline of all adventure". She spent her evenings at cocktail parties and dark bars where she proudly stayed till last call. But there was a price. Publicly, she covered her shame with self-deprecating jokes, and her career flourished, but as the blackouts accumulated, she could no longer avoid a sinking truth.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
yes! finally! something relatable
- By Jennifer A on 2021-07-16
Written by: Sarah Hepola
-
Between Breaths
- A Memoir of Panic and Addiction
- Written by: Elizabeth Vargas
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Vargas
- Length: 5 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 36
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 28
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 28
Beloved former ABC 20/20 anchor Elizabeth Vargas reveals her alcohol addiction and anxiety disorder in a shockingly honest and emotional memoir. From the moment she uttered the brave and honest words, "I am an alcoholic," to interviewer George Stephanopoulos, Elizabeth Vargas began writing her story, as her experiences were still raw. Now, in Between Breaths, Vargas discusses her accounts of growing up with anxiety—which began suddenly at the age of six when her father served in Vietnam.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Great !!
- By Anonymous User on 2023-01-04
Written by: Elizabeth Vargas
-
Playground
- A Childhood Lost Inside the Playboy Mansion
- Written by: Jennifer Saginor
- Narrated by: Kassidy Cortese
- Length: 6 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 9
-
Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 8
-
Story3.5 out of 5 stars 8
In the vein of Running with Scissors, Playground is the glitzy, glamorous, and surreal true story of a young girl who grew up inside the Playboy Mansion and never learned where the party stopped and the real world began. You are six years old. Every day after school your father takes you to a sprawling castle filled with exotic animals, bowls of candy, and half-naked women catering to your every need. You have your own room. You have new friends. You have an uncle Hef who's always there for you.
-
1 out of 5 stars
-
Pointless
- By Sheena on 2024-11-12
Written by: Jennifer Saginor
-
Down the Drain
- Written by: Julia Fox
- Narrated by: Julia Fox
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 210
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 188
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 189
Julia Fox is famous for many things: her captivating acting, such as her breakout role in the film Uncut Gems; her trendsetting style, including bleached eyebrows, exaggerated eyeshadow, and cutout dresses; her mastery of social media, where she entertains and educates her millions of followers. But all these share the trait for which she is most famous: unabashedly and unapologetically being herself. This commitment to authenticity has never been more on display than in Down the Drain. With writing that is both eloquent and accessible, Fox recounts her turbulent path to cultural supremacy.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
I’ve never felt more empowerment going into my 30’s
- By carly on 2023-12-12
Written by: Julia Fox
-
Glorious Rock Bottom
- Written by: Bryony Gordon
- Narrated by: Bryony Gordon
- Length: 5 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 6
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 6
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 6
Bryony Gordon is a respected journalist, a number one best-selling author and an award-winning mental health campaigner. She is also an alcoholic. In Glorious Rock Bottom Bryony opens up about a toxic 20-year relationship with alcohol and drugs and explains exactly why hitting rock bottom - for her, a traumatic event and the abrupt realisation that she was putting herself in danger, time and again - saved her life.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
good listen
- By AM on 2023-05-07
Written by: Bryony Gordon
What listeners say about How to Murder Your Life
Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- MB
- 2022-03-10
The best train wreck I have ever listened to!
Listening to Cat's story will instantly make you feel better about your life. I laughed (many times) and others wanted to shake this woman and tell her she doesn't have to live this way! There is a little redemption at the end...
I would (and have) definitely recommend this to my other hot-mess girlfriends. When I need some comic relief, or to feel like I am not screwing up my life too badly, I turn this back on (for a second or third listen!)
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 2021-05-18
Glad I stuck with it-EXCELLENT
Lemme just say, I can handle “valley girl” talk, but if you can’t, this is not the book for you! Totally rad book. Lol...Lots of “name dropping” haute couture, big name designers, beauty companies etc. Gotta be quick to keep up with Kat! Again, if you aren’t into fashion and beauty, and want the book for it’s “addiction” story, my feeling is it would be much better received knowing the fashion and beauty industry.....but I guess that’s up to you to decide. Loved it. Thanks Kat, glad you are feeling better.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 2019-12-07
Loved it
I absolutely loved this soapy, honest account of addiction. So real and funny and brutal.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 2019-11-28
I fucking love you cat.
The rawest memoir EVER. And the fact cat Is the narrater makes it that much better.
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- T
- 2020-06-26
Love this book!
I honestly couldn’t get enough of Cat’s honesty and story. She is such a great writer - and kept my attention throughout the entire book. Hope she releases more books in the future!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amber Tristram
- 2020-04-09
love it.
love this memoire. some parts did hit close to home and I wasn't sure I would be able to continue to listen but glad I did. I also went on to listen to her second book as well. equally well written.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 2024-01-21
i love you cat marnell
i've read the book three times now but once i saw that cat narrated the audiobook version, i HAD to listen to it. hearing her read it in her voice makes it more interesting than it already is. i'm so obsessed with her and her story and she's helped me to realise a lot of things about my own addiction problem. i love her writing style and the way she expresses her words in the audiobook make it even better. i can't wait to read/listen to another book of hers
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Michelle McNab
- 2023-09-05
The screaming throughout the audiobook is insufferable.
Great story. AWFUL narration. Do yourself a favour and read this and take a hard pass on the audio version.
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Mickey 0909
- 2022-10-13
Awful!
I rarely find myself inspired to write a review, but if it saves you from wasting your time and money on this trite, poorly written and narrated story then it is worth it. It glorifies addiction, and boasts about the narrator vaguely succeeding while constantly being high and engaging in utter assholery. If reading about being stoned in New York and bragging about it floats your boat, then knock your self out. And If I have to hear the writer scream one more time, I may poke my ears out. There is nothing redeeming about this story. I’m not even sure how it ends because I couldn’t bear it anymore and quit about 3/4 of the way through.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Veronika
- 2020-05-14
Reads like an angsty teen's diary
I'll admit, this review is based on only the first three chapters of the book, which I struggled through. It reads like the author tried to write an edgy YA, but ended up with a mundane day-to-day diary in the life of an angsty teen, read by the narrator with an abundance of lilts in tone and "like" and "ugh"s.
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