Loving You Is Hurting Me
A New Approach to Healing Trauma Bonds and Creating Authentic Connection
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Loving You Is Hurting Me
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Narrated by:
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Laura Copley
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Donna Jay Fulks
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Written by:
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Laura Copley
About this listen
Learn how to heal your emotional wounds, get unstuck, and get into healthy, loving, intimate relationships with the help of this eye-opening book.
At the core of most toxic relationships is a painful trauma wound desperate to be healed. As a licensed professional counselor and trauma researcher, Dr. Laura Copley often found herself disturbed by the stigma that her profession puts on trauma survivors who are in these toxic bonds, often too quickly labeling them as victims or abusers and blaming them for their troubled relationships.
Too often, survivors of trauma are left feeling hopeless, exiled from normal social interactions, and destined for heartbreak in any relationship they attract. Through her work with clients, and her own experiences, Dr. Copley developed a roadmap for healing the toxic emotions that come from being bonded by trauma in relationships.
In Loving You is Hurting Me, Dr. Copley guides you through your trauma origins and into a life rich with meaning, loving connection, and inspiration. Drawing from groundbreaking science on trauma and its effects on the body, and from her own practice including a decade’s worth of research on trauma and intimacy, Dr. Copley presents an experiential and transformative approach unlike any other. Her program transforms your trauma bond into deep connection with the self and safe intimacy with others.
©2023 Laura Copley (P)2023 BalanceWhat the critics say
“A compassionate and concrete guide on healing the trauma that gets in the way of having fulfilling relationships, Loving You is Hurting Me offers a groundbreaking perspective on unravelling old toxic patterns and creating a life rich with love, connection, and purpose. Through her expertise as both a therapist and trauma bond survivor, Laura takes our hand and leads us through a deeper understanding of our family origins and helps us reclaim our story of healing and transformation.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times best-selling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone and co-host of the Dear Therapists podcast
“When couples get stuck in toxic patterns it’s often not enough to problem-solve and look for solutions. Sometimes to go forward, you have to first go down: into the relationship’s emotional underground. And what’s often there beneath the surface is trauma: two people held together by the pain of their pasts and trapped in patterns that persistently re-traumatize. Thankfully, Laura Copley is right there to guide us, shining a bright light on our emotional underground and showing us that the only way out is not back up, but “through.”—Ian Kerner, sex therapist and New York Times best-selling author of She Comes First
"Beautifully written…a must-read for therapists and clients alike! Despite the difficult subject matter, Dr. Copley constantly and lovingly reminds us that we possess the capacity to tap into our own magical wisdom, self-compassion, and inner guardians, and offers thought-provoking and meaningful tools to help us navigate the journey from trauma to transformation and post-traumatic growth."—Lisa Ferentz, LCSW-C, author of Finding Your Ruby Slippers: Transformative Life Lessons from the Therapist’s Couch