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She's Not There

A Life in Two Genders

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She's Not There

Written by: Jennifer Finney Boylan, Deirdre Finney Boylan, Richard Russo
Narrated by: Jennifer Finney Boylan, Deirdre Finney Boylan
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Narrated by the author with two afterwords: one written and read by Deirdre Finney Boylan, and one written and read by Richard Russo


The provocative bestseller She’s Not There is the winning, utterly surprising story of a person changing genders. By turns hilarious and deeply moving, Jennifer Finney Boylan explores the territory that lies between men and women, examines changing friendships, and rejoices in the redeeming power of family. Told in Boylan’s fresh voice, She’s Not There is about a person bearing and finally revealing a complex secret. Through her clear eyes, She’s Not There provides a new window on the confounding process of accepting our true selves.


“Probably no book I’ve read in recent years has made me so question my basic assumptions about both the centrality and the permeability of gender, and made me recognize myself in a situation I’ve never known and have never faced . . . The universality of the astonishingly uncommon: that’s the trick of She’s Not There. And with laughs, too. What a good book.” —Anna Quindlen, from the Introduction to the Book-of-the-Month-Club edition. Biographies & Memoirs Parenting & Families Relationships Witty Funny
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What the critics say

“She’s Not There, the Running with Scissors of sex-change stories, brings irreverence and a merrily outrageous sense of humor to this potentially serious business.” —Janet Maslin, New York Times


“Beautifully crafted, fearless, painfully honest, inspiring, and extremely witty. Jennifer Finney Boylan is an exquisite writer with a fascinating story, and this combination has resulted in one of the most remarkable, moving, and unforgettable memoirs in recent history.” —Augusten Burroughs, author of Running with Scissors and Dry
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I read this book to help me understand what it means to be transgender. This story is so much more. As is the trans gender person in my life. Lesson learned.

A truly great love story

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This is a book showing human love and compassion. I love Jenny is reading it in her own voice, it is not perfect, but it is so real and raw. It brought the listeners so much closer to her journey. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

What a journey

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Some sections of this memoir are very well-written and offer a few powerful insights in the author's personal experience and the broader topic of trans identity. However, most of the story takes the very conventional form of the hero's/heroine's journey (this is even acknowledged in the book), complete with a very successful conclusion in which the protagonist is embraced by friends, family, and community. I wish the author had written more about Melanie, her roommate in the hospital. Melanie comes across as a fascinating character in the afterword written by Boylan's friend, Rick Russo. Melanie's story reveals that not everyone who experiences trans identity is as privileged as Jenny Boylan (whose loving friends and family support her, whose job as a tenured professor is secure, and who has the money to be able to afford surgery). I sense that Boylan struggled with the burden of wanting to make trans people seem "normal," and thus to represent trans identity in a positive light, but an unfortunate side effect of this is that she made herself seem a bit boring.

This audiobook is narrated by the author herself. Listening to it made me realize why it is better for professional actors to perform these narrations. Boylan's narration generally seems inconsistent, and when she tries to do the voices of other characters it often sounds artificial. The power of the material would have come across better through the voice of someone who could have brought it to life more effectively.

Interesting but....

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