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  • Still, I Cannot Save You

  • A Memoir of Sisterhood, Love, and Letting Go
  • Written by: Kelly S. Thompson
  • Narrated by: Kelly S. Thompson
  • Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
  • 4.2 out of 5 stars (12 ratings)

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Still, I Cannot Save You

Written by: Kelly S. Thompson
Narrated by: Kelly S. Thompson
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Publisher's Summary

Shortlisted for the 2024 Evelyn Richardson Non-Fiction Award
Nominated for the Inaugural Reader's Choice Award

With honesty, love, and humour, in this moving memoir, Kelly S. Thompson explores her relationship with her older sister, Meghan. Tested by addiction, abuse, and illness, the sisters’ relationship crumbles, only to be rebuilt into an everlasting bond.


Kelly Thompson and her older sister, Meghan, are proof that sisterhood doesn’t always equate to friendship.
Growing up within a military family, the girls were close despite being temperamental opposites—Kelly, anxious and studious, looked to her big sister for comfort, and Meghan, who battled kidney cancer as a toddler, was gregarious and protective. But as she approached adulthood, Meghan spi­ralled into a cocaine and opioid addiction, and Kelly’s relationship with her sister was torn apart.
Their paths diverge as they live their own lives, and it is only when Meghan becomes a mother that she and Kelly tentatively face past hurts and reexamine what sisterhood really means. But their reunion is threatened when Meghan receives a shocking new diagnosis on a day that should be one for celebration. Now, as the family reels at the prospect of the biggest loss imaginable, Kelly and Meghan must share all that they can in the time that they have, using their mutual sense of humour to chart a course through the darkest of days.
At once funny and heartbreaking, Still, I Cannot Save You is a story about addiction, abuse, and tragedy, but above all, it is a powerful portrait of an enduring love between sisters.

©2023 Kelly S. Thompson (P)2023 McClelland & Stewart
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What the critics say

“With this heartwrenching yet hopeful book, Kelly has turned her loss and grief into something beautiful.” —Rachel Matlow, author of Dead Mom Walking

“Told with candor and unflinching humor, Still, I Cannot Save You is a compelling portrait of a complicated sisterly love. Thompson is a master storyteller who asks readers to examine their turbulent relationships with troubled family members and the incredible bonds that hold us together. Her beautiful and affecting prose will leave you with a terrible ache in your chest. It will shatter your heart and then mend it together with tenderness and finely-wrought insight. I sobbed, laughed, and cheered for Thompson and her sister. Heroic and unforgettable.” —Lindsay Wong, The Woo-Woo and Tell Me Pleasant Things about Immortality

“With unadorned language and a keen eye for the details of everyday life, Kelly S. Thompson triangulates the position between love, anger, and helplessness.” —David Macfarlane, author of Likeness

What listeners say about Still, I Cannot Save You

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Brave and helpful for other caregivers

It is a poignant novel about caretaking and loving someone through the face of death.
As a caretaker myself, it was helpful to hear the details about hospice and helping guide a person you love deeply towards death.

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Beautiful story of sisterly love

A raw and honest memoir that explores the complicated impacts of addiction on family dynamics and the enduring love of two very different sisters.

Gorgeous writing - even better than the author’s first book, Girls Need Not Apply.

I had to keep the tissues close at hand while reading.

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That takes courage!

It must have been really difficult for the author to narrate her own book, I commend her for her courage in doing this!

There are many layers of grief that were explored including the varied emotions involved which are relatable. She was also quite truthful about sibling and family relationships. As Meghan said, "...maybe because writers look at what it is to be human that they're just showing us who we are." It was well-written and performed with grace.

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Excellent

I really enjoyed it. Beautifully told story of love and loss. It was a tear jerker.

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Heartwarming

What a beautifully told memoir about the trials and triumphs of witnessing someone you love dearly battle addiction, illness and walking a path toward sure destruction and love them despite not liking them. It’s a beautiful telling of the complicated growing up years mixed with the coming back together as adults, as sisters, despite tragedy led to the realization of the strength and love in those bonds that can never be broken.

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Wish It Was More

Although written/narrated very well & the author describes visual details, etc with clarity, her characters are a mystery. Meghan is a hard character to like. Seems like no one sets boundaries for her, ever.
Her needs are endless & her family feels guilty for not doing enough. Co-dependency is tough but how did she spiral into addictions in the first place? A chapter dedicated to her parents/childhood/adolescence/young adulthood wld hv informed the reader as to why Kelly & family didn't set boundaries. Was it bc she was a childhood cancer survivor? So much was missing. It was odd they kept serving a recovered addict alcohol, no one seemed upset that she had 2 babies with an abusive husband, lots of anger twrds hubby or inattentive health care workers, but very little twrds her. They just kept picking up her pieces. Not a great read for other families dealing with abuse/ addictions. Love is important- boundaries even more so. This read more like a book about a cancer journey & glaring, unresolved co-dependency.🤷‍♀️

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