The Virgin Romance Novelist Chronicles
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Narrated by:
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Andi Arndt
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Jeffrey Kafer
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Written by:
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Meghan Quinn
About this listen
From USA Today best selling Author Meghan Quinn, comes a hilarious romantic comedy that will touch your heart and cause you to roar with laughter as you escape into Rosie Bloom's attempt to write a romance novel.
"Her bosom heaved at an alarming rate as his rough hand found its way down to her soft, yet wiry briar patch...."
Can you say briar patch in a romance novel? What about breasts? Do bosoms really heave?
Goodness, I have no idea what I'm doing. I’m a virgin attempting to write a romance novel and I'm having an impossible time trying to write a passionate and swoon-worthy love scene worthy of being published, thanks to my lack of experience.
My two best friends encourage me to drop the pen, step outside my comfort zone, and gain some real life experience through multiple dating facets such as blind dates, online profiles, and random hookups. But losing my "flower" is proving to be much tougher than expected....
This is the story of my awkward, humiliating, and slightly terrifying life, but like all romance novels, I know it will end in a happily ever after. At least that's what I keep telling myself.
Warning: Listen in the confines of your own home due to random outbursts of laughter. If you are addicted to cliffhangers, getting your heart ripped out of your chest, and feeling like a bulldozer just plowed through your stomach, then this audiobook is not for you. if you like peeing your pants and crying from laughing so hard, then please continue listening.
©2018 Meghan Quinn (P)2019 Meghan QuinnYou may also enjoy...
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When the publicity team of the new local restaurant Going in Blind begins their search for a hot, local celebrity to promote the wildly popular eatery, they couldn't have found a better person than Noely Clark. A hopeless romantic with an exceedingly demanding schedule, she found it impossible to find the man of her dreams so being set up on three very different, very attractive, and very distinctive blind dates, seemed like a great idea, but who will she choose?
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The Trade
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I got the dreaded phone call, the one every baseball player hopes and prays never comes. I was traded - yeah, that phone call - traded from my longtime team of over 10 years to not just any team...to my childhood rivals, the Chicago Rebels. I was completely and utterly screwed, right? Wrong. The trade was the least of my concerns. I met a girl, Natalie. She was perfect, but I swore I would never get involved with anyone during the season. It was too complicated. But can you believe I had zero restraint when it came to this girl?
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What a surprise
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I’ve got a list of people I absolutely don’t ever want to be stuck with on a boat, or a plane, or a train, and it starts and ends with the broody, grumpy, too-sexy-for-my-own good Axel Huxley. Also known as this romance novelist’s number one nemesis. The man is legendary for his mighty pen and his even mightier scowl. I tried to work together with the cocky thriller writer once upon a time, but the two of us are like vodka and good decisions. We don’t play well together.
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Very sweet
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Five hockey players, a cabin in the woods...and little old me, Winnie Berlin. Sounds like the start of a fantasy, right? But it's not. It's my reality. It all started when I got lost in the middle of the Canadian Rockies. A wicked thunderstorm sent my car mud sliding into a ditch, and for a girl whose survival skills involve finding the nearest Starbucks, I was in deep trouble. Forced to abandon my car in search of help, I stumbled upon a cabin in the middle of nowhere.
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Cute HEA story
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With wedding planning underway and a short timeline, my best friend, Lia, has recruited me to help her battle the snarly beast that is Mrs. Beaver. Not scared at all, I accept the challenge as her man-in-waiting--aka, man of honor--and take matters into my own hands. The only problem is, with every second we draw closer to the wedding, I'm starting to see my best girl in a different light. She's always been beautiful to me, but now . . . I find myself staring a touch too long. My hand lingering for one more minute. And when she's upset? Allowing her to sleep in my bed.
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Irritating characters
- By jackieee on 2024-07-19
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Bridesmaid for Hire
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Overall
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After years of working her tail off at her event-planning business, Maggie Mitchell is ready for a vacation. With nothing on her mind but R & R, she’s enjoying the warm weather of Bora Bora when in saunters Brody McFadden, her brother’s best friend and also her sworn enemy. Thanks to years of tension between the two—kicked off by a make-out session at her brother’s wedding that ended horribly—Maggie has sworn to stay away from the man. That is, until she finds out he’s in Bora Bora for his boss’s daughter’s wedding, hoping to use the trip to win a real future at the company.
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A great story
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Three Blind Dates
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When the publicity team of the new local restaurant Going in Blind begins their search for a hot, local celebrity to promote the wildly popular eatery, they couldn't have found a better person than Noely Clark. A hopeless romantic with an exceedingly demanding schedule, she found it impossible to find the man of her dreams so being set up on three very different, very attractive, and very distinctive blind dates, seemed like a great idea, but who will she choose?
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The Trade
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Overall
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Performance
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I got the dreaded phone call, the one every baseball player hopes and prays never comes. I was traded - yeah, that phone call - traded from my longtime team of over 10 years to not just any team...to my childhood rivals, the Chicago Rebels. I was completely and utterly screwed, right? Wrong. The trade was the least of my concerns. I met a girl, Natalie. She was perfect, but I swore I would never get involved with anyone during the season. It was too complicated. But can you believe I had zero restraint when it came to this girl?
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What a surprise
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Written by: Meghan Quinn
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My So-Called Love Life
- Written by: Lauren Blakely
- Narrated by: Vanessa Edwin, Sebastian York
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
-
Story
I’ve got a list of people I absolutely don’t ever want to be stuck with on a boat, or a plane, or a train, and it starts and ends with the broody, grumpy, too-sexy-for-my-own good Axel Huxley. Also known as this romance novelist’s number one nemesis. The man is legendary for his mighty pen and his even mightier scowl. I tried to work together with the cocky thriller writer once upon a time, but the two of us are like vodka and good decisions. We don’t play well together.
-
-
Very sweet
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Written by: Lauren Blakely
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Kiss and Don't Tell
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Jason Clarke, Vanessa Edwin
- Length: 11 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Five hockey players, a cabin in the woods...and little old me, Winnie Berlin. Sounds like the start of a fantasy, right? But it's not. It's my reality. It all started when I got lost in the middle of the Canadian Rockies. A wicked thunderstorm sent my car mud sliding into a ditch, and for a girl whose survival skills involve finding the nearest Starbucks, I was in deep trouble. Forced to abandon my car in search of help, I stumbled upon a cabin in the middle of nowhere.
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Written by: Meghan Quinn
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A Long Time Coming
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
With wedding planning underway and a short timeline, my best friend, Lia, has recruited me to help her battle the snarly beast that is Mrs. Beaver. Not scared at all, I accept the challenge as her man-in-waiting--aka, man of honor--and take matters into my own hands. The only problem is, with every second we draw closer to the wedding, I'm starting to see my best girl in a different light. She's always been beautiful to me, but now . . . I find myself staring a touch too long. My hand lingering for one more minute. And when she's upset? Allowing her to sleep in my bed.
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Irritating characters
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The Brentwood Boys
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Overall
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The Brentwood Boys have come together in a three-book audio collection for the first time ever! More than 30 hours of delicious baseball players brought to you by your favorite narrators including Sebastian York, Savannah Peachwood, Stephen Dexter, Rock Engle, Felicity Monroe, and Maxine Mitchell.
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Great listen
- By Cosmo_daisy on 2024-01-28
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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The Reunion
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Martin and Peggy Chance believe love should last a lifetime. With their fiftieth wedding anniversary on the horizon, they’ve modeled a beautiful relationship for their three grown children. But to their dismay, that lesson hasn’t quite caught on—the three siblings just can’t seem to take a chance and find love in their own lives.
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Ok except for narrator
- By Teresa R. on 2022-03-02
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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Co-Wrecker
- Binghamton Series, Book 1
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- Length: 11 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
What do ice cream and Sadie Montgomery have in common? They're both ice cold, but one taste is never enough. I wanted to be friends - I would have even settled for her seeing me as anything but a nerd - but there was no getting through. So just like any hard-headed, red-blooded man out there, I made up my mind. I'd make my coworker fall for me.
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Can’t get past Andrew’s Voice
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Written by: Meghan Quinn
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The Duets: A Contemporary Romance Box Set
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
This isn’t a story about a love triangle. There is no triangle involved. This isn’t a story about an accidental pregnancy. Although having a baby with her...I would. This isn’t a story about lies and deception, even though at times I’ve lied to myself. No, this is my story. A story about sacrifice. A story about a man who fell in love with the wrong girl. A story I wish I never had to tell. I learned a long damn time ago, the only way to achieve my dreams was to avoid distractions - at any cost.
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The feels, the emotions, the love
- By ChantalG on 2020-10-22
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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So Not Meant to Be
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Aaron Shedlock, Stella Hunter
- Length: 13 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Am I friends with JP Cane? Ha! That's laughable. Besides the fact that he’s adopted some far-fetched notion from the movie When Harry Met Sally that says men and women can't be friends and work together, it’s safe to say we're not friends. He's annoyingly loud, obnoxiously handsome, and has made an art out of poking all my hot buttons...multiple times a day. So you can imagine how disgruntled I am when I not only have to fly to San Francisco with him for work, but stay in the same penthouse. Yup, we're sharing the same air, 24-7. We're talking full-fledged working roommates.
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awful
- By Csngstr on 2024-12-13
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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Boss Man Bridegroom
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Kelsey Navarro Foster, Connor Crais
- Length: 13 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
How did I go from being insulted by Charlee Cox to hiring her to be my assistant? How is it that she’s chaos in color - making me crazy and my life better at the same time? I never thought I would be staring down at her bright blue eyes begging me to go along with the ridiculous scheme I suggested. Yes, I suggested it. Like the idiot I am, I thought hey, why not start an HR nightmare and have my assistant ask me to marry her? Confused? Don’t worry, so am I.
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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The Wedding Game
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Lauren Sweet, Tor Thom
- Length: 12 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Luna Rossi is a veritable crafting genius — she can bedazzle and bead so hard her Etsy site is one of the hottest in the world. So it’s only natural that Luna would convince her brother and his husband-to-be to compete on The Wedding Game, a “do-it-yourself” TV show, for the title of Top DIY Wedding Expert.
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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Put Me in Detention
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Vanessa Edwin, John Hartley
- Length: 14 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
I was hanging with the girls, celebrating my divorce, when I saw him - my crush, sitting in the corner of the bar, all alone. Being single and looking for a wild night, I asked him if he wanted to join me. To my delight, he said yes. On paper, it seemed like I had hit the jackpot. And if I wasn't fresh from a toxic marriage, I would have absolutely noticed the finer things about him. But, I wanted nothing to do with being married, so when I arrived back home from my eventful weekend in Vegas, the last thing I expected to see was a new doting husband already moved in.
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loved it
- By 🎧💕💕💕 readittomebaby 💕💕💕🎧 on 2022-01-13
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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The Secret to Dating Your Best Friend's Sister
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Charley Ongel, Tor Thom
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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How do you date your best friend's sister? Easy...At least - that's what I thought was going to happen. But my attempts to win over Julia Westin backfired in more ways than I can count. The thing about Julia? She's smart - really smart - and her wicked gaze cuts through all the charm I've tried slinging her way. She's not interested in games, my gifts, or my stories. She might want me too; but she's not giving in that easy....
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Slow burn, enticing and so fun!! 🤩
- By Sabrina Adib on 2020-09-21
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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The Revenge Pact
- Enemies-to-Lovers Standalone (Kings of Football, Book 1)
- Written by: Ilsa Madden-Mills
- Narrated by: CJ Bloom, Lee Samuels
- Length: 10 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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River Tate is a god on campus. The king of football. A tattooed bad boy with gunmetal eyes that see right through you. The only chink in his armor is HER, the girl he pretends doesn't exist, the forbidden one with the shy smile and lavender hair. Anastasia Bailey is a nobody.
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Amazing!
- By leanne h. on 2022-05-19
Written by: Ilsa Madden-Mills
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The Mother Road
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Greyson Ash, J.F. Harding
- Length: 10 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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It all started when my brother, Paul, convinced me to go on one last family road trip across the Mother Road with him and my dad. Just like old times, right? Wrong. What Paul fails to mention is his best man, Porter, will be joining us, who just so happens to be my childhood crush and the man who broke my heart four years ago. What is supposed to be a fun family bonding experience across Route 66 turns into a war of pranks, awkward moments and bathrooms full of dirty flannel shirts and day-old beard clippings.
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Skip this one. 12 y/o humour.
- By Anonymous User on 2023-09-05
Written by: Meghan Quinn
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Vacation Wars
- Written by: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: CJ Bloom, Lee Samuels
- Length: 13 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Prepared for a good time, Tessa is thrilled to spend the weeks before her sister’s wedding at their family’s favorite vacation spot: Santorini. Sandy beaches, stonewashed houses, attractive men—it’s heaven. But Tessa’s idea of a girls’ trip comes to a screaming halt when her sister thinks it’s high time Tessa finds some love herself. Unfortunately, Tessa forgot about the deal she made back in high school: she has to find her soulmate before her sister’s wedding. Or else.
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LAUGH OUT LOUD FUN!
- By Cosmic Deanna on 2023-06-18
Written by: Meghan Quinn
What listeners say about The Virgin Romance Novelist Chronicles
Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Laura L
- 2019-07-09
First book was great!
Unfortunately, book two and book three were let downs. The man’s voice in the second and third books was jarring. One consistent narrator would have improved the flow.
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- Jennifer
- 2022-12-17
So fun!!
I just loved the honesty!! Loved this!
Performances are great! I loved the story line too!!
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- Anonymous User
- 2019-06-24
one of the funniest and realest book I've read
I truly enjoyed this book. the narration, the story... AMAZING! Def a must read/listen to. Do yourself a favor and get this book. you'll enjoy it from beginning to end!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 2019-08-28
Great book
Super funny, easy listening romance book. Loved it and would recommend it. The review shouldn’t have to be at least 15 words
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- Amazon Customer
- 2022-02-25
totally loved it!
Made me laugh out loud (in public) so many times! I truly think this is one of the best rom coms I've listened to.
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- Amazon Customer
- 2019-05-09
absolutely amazing!
totally loved it!
couldn't stop listening!
recommend to various friends
found it very real and relateable
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- Pedsrn1988
- 2024-06-20
Hilarious
Rosie is innocent about sex. Her sex adventures are one fiasco after another. Her best friend, Henry is more than willing to give her advice. It is hard not to burst out laughing while listening to this series. Andi Arndt and Jeffrey Kafer were able to deliver the hilarity with their expert talents. Ms. Quinn writes fantastic romantic comedies.
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- Dana M.
- 2019-08-29
hmmmm
The first few encounters I laughed out loud. Then is was just stupid. Nobody is that naive. I could not finish listening to this.
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1 person found this helpful