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Unmasked

My Life Solving America's Cold Cases

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Unmasked

Written by: Paul Holes, Robin Gaby Fisher
Narrated by: Paul Holes
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About this listen

2022 Audible.com Best of the Year, Long-listed
2022 Hudson Booksellers Best of the Year, Long-listed
2022 Amazon.com Best Books of the Year, Long-listed

This program is read by the author.

From the detective who found the Golden State Killer, a memoir of investigating America’s toughest cold cases and the rewards–and toll–of a life solving crime.

I order another bourbon, neat. This is the drink that will flip the switch. I don’t even know how I got here, to this place, to this point. Something is happening to me lately. I’m drinking too much. My sheets are soaking wet when I wake up from nightmares of decaying corpses. I order another drink and swig it, trying to forget about the latest case I can’t shake.

Crime solving for me is more complex than the challenge of the hunt, or the process of piecing together a scientific puzzle. The thought of good people suffering drives me, for better or worse, to the point of obsession. People always ask how I am able to detach from the horrors of my work. Part of it is an innate capacity to compartmentalize; the rest is experience and exposure, and I’ve had plenty of both. But I have always taken pride in the fact that I can keep my feelings locked up to get the job done. It’s only been recently that it feels like all that suppressed darkness is beginning to seep out.

When I look back at my long career, there is a lot I am proud of. I have caught some of the most notorious killers of the twenty-first century and brought justice and closure for their victims and families. I want to tell you about a lifetime solving these cold cases, from Laci Peterson to Jaycee Dugard to the Pittsburg homicides to, yes, my twenty-year-long hunt for the Golden State Killer.

But a deeper question eats at me as I ask myself, at what cost? I have sacrificed relationships, joy—even fatherhood—because the pursuit of evil always came first. Did I make the right choice? It’s something I grapple with every day. Yet as I stand in the spot where a young girl took her last breath, as I look into the eyes of her family, I know that, for me, there has never been a choice. “I don’t know if I can solve your case,” I whisper. “But I promise I will do my best.”

It is a promise I know I can keep.

A Macmillan Audio production from Celadon Books

©2022 Paul Holes (P)2022 Macmillan Audio
True Crime Cold Case Forensics
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What the critics say

"[Paul Holes's] memoir grabs its reader in a stranglehold and proves more fascinating than fiction and darker than any noir narrative."
Los Angeles Magazine

"Fans of true crime will love every page of Unmasked. It is a wildly engaging and painfully honest read that will appeal to anyone curious about the lives of those who pursue justice for voiceless victims."
San Francisco Chronicle

"An exceptional memoir... his unflinching look at the emotional toll the more than 27 years he spent working in Contra Costa County in the San Francisco Bay Area took on him and his family distinguishes this from similar true crime narratives."
Publishers Weekly, starred review

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What listeners say about Unmasked

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Awesome!

For true crime fans…a must have in their collection of true crime stories! Great Stuff!

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Easy listen and amazing story

Really enjoyed hearing the process. Sometimes new innovations shift paradigms. Sometimes you just need to fail to push through.

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Binged in under two days!

As a long time listener of My Favourite Murder and a newer fan to the Buried Bones podcast- I thought I’d give this a listen. Absolutely incredible to hear the first-hand experience of Paul Holes and his journey to catch some of the most disgusting and notorious predators in recent U.S. history. Great chapter on the great Michelle McNamara. Incredible insights into the process of tracking down serial rapists and killers. All while navigating developing DNA technology, family life, personal struggles and the infuriating egos in politics to get to the truth and find some justice for countless victims. Thank you for telling your story Paul!

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Awesome

My title pretty much sums it up. The only thing I didn’t like about the book is that it ended! I could have easily listened to Paul for several more hours. A follow up with other cases would be amazing. I am a murderino(?) so I am used to listening to Paul, but it was very interesting learning about Paul in this way. Awesome.

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Thank You Paul

great book Paul!! Thank you so much for narrating yourself! Thank you for being a voice for so many victims!

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Paul Holes is Incredible

I loved this memoir! As a true crime junkie I couldn’t wait to get my hands on this and dive into the mind of one of the best cold-case investigators. It was truly heartbreaking to hear Holes talk about what toll these cases took on not just him physically & mentally but on his family. Having to deal with crippling anxiety, a divorce, a second marriage that was also heading potentially down the same path to then finally finding the golden state killer really opened my eyes to the sacrifices these men & woman make to keep our cities safe. As a true crime junkie I’ve never really thought about the other side of the cases we obsesses over which is the fact that these cops & investigators who are handling these cases go through so much and give up so much to do what they do. So many sleepless nights, neglecting their own health and family. It really takes a toll. So thank you to all the individuals involved who keep us safe!

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Fascinating!

Awesome! Very interesting and a beautiful take on what it is like to do this kind of gruelling hard work! Captivating! Thank you!

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Amazing!

Couldn't stop listening. Paul Holes is a hero, without a cape.

Can listen to his voice for days!!

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Never Quit

Paul gives a lesson in never quiting and the cost of success. very good lessons!

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this book was everything it promised to be

I listened to this book on a trip home from beginning to end and was hooked! amazing to hear it from the author himself! absolutely appreciated the authenticity and honesty shared by the author about successes and vulnerabilities.

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