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When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?

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When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?

Written by: George Carlin
Narrated by: George Carlin
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About this listen

 Following his two New York Times best sellers, Brain Droppings and Napalm & Silly Putty, comes George Carlin's third audiobook, When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?, a riotous journey through the mind of one of America's premiere comic observers.

Ranging from his absurdist side (Message from a Cockroach; TV News: The Death of Humpty Dumpty; Tips for Serial Killers) to his unerring ear for American speech (Politician Talk; Societal Cliches; 13 Sections of Euphemisms) to his unsparing views on America and its values (War, God, Stuff Like That; Zero Tolerance; Tired of the Handi-crap), Carlin's legendary irreverence and iconoclasm are on full display as he vainly scours the American landscape for signs of intelligence.

He also has a silly side:

  • You know what kind of guy you never see anymore? A fop.
  • A good motto to live by: "Always try not to get killed."
  • I've never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.
  • A lot of gay men stay in the closet because they're interested in fashion.
  • I have an impersonal trainer. We meet at the gym, we don't talk, he works out alone, and I go home.
  • Here's something you can't do by yourself: practice shaking hands.
  • When it comes to God's existence, I'm not an atheist and I'm not an agnostic. I'm an acrostic. The whole thing puzzles me.
  • Good news for senior citizens: Death is near!
  • O.J. Simpson has already received the ultimate punishment: For the rest of his life he has to associate with golfers.
    • ©2004 Comedy Concepts, Inc. (P)2004 Hyperion     Entertainment & Celebrities Literature & Fiction United States World Literature Comedy Celebrity Funny Witty Physical Exercise

    What the critics say

    • Audie Award Finalist, Humor, 2005
    • 2005 Quill Award Nominee
    • Grammy Award Nominee, Best Spoken Word Album, 2005

    "There's no better way to enjoy one of Carlin's books than to hear him read it himself....Carlin has his comic timing down pat. His energetic reading is punctuated by conversational bits and enhanced by his deft vocal variation, making listeners feel as if they've got a front-row seat at one of his comedy shows." (Publishers Weekly)

    What listeners say about When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?

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      2 out of 5 stars
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    Profile Image for Sharda

    Better I Print

    This was not a good book for audible to have taken on. its not really meant to be consumed in large quantities. Its easier to digest if you read a few blurbs then stop and think about it, which is not fluid as an audio book

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    • Overall
      3 out of 5 stars
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    Profile Image for edjoemiller

    How bitter the author/narrator sounds.

    Very disappointing. George Carline was one of my favorites, but in this book, he just sounds bitter.

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