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You'll Do
- A History of Marrying for Reasons Other Than Love
- Narrated by: Leigh Serling
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
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Publisher's Summary
An illuminating and thought-provoking examination of the uniquely American institution of marriage, from the Colonial era through the #MeToo age
Perfect for fans of Rebecca Solnit and Rebecca Traister
Americans hold marriage in such high esteem that we push people toward it, reward them for taking part in it, and fetishize its benefits to the point that we routinely ignore or excuse bad behavior and societal ills in the name of protecting and promoting it.
In eras of slavery and segregation, Blacks sometimes gained white legal status through marriage.
Laws have been designed to encourage people to marry so that certain societal benefits could be achieved: the population would increase, women would have financial security, children would be cared for, and immigrants would have familial connections.
As late as the Great Depression, poor young women were encouraged to marry aged Civil War veterans for lifetime pensions.
The widely overlooked problem with this tradition is that individuals and society have relied on marriage to address or dismiss a range of injustices and inequities, from gender- and race-based discrimination, sexual violence, and predation to unequal financial treatment.
One of the most persuasive arguments against women's right to vote was that marrying and influencing their husband's choices was just as meaningful, if not better.
Through revealing storytelling, Zug builds a compelling case that when marriage is touted as “the solution” to such problems, it absolves the government, and society, of the responsibility for directly addressing them.
What the critics say
“Gold diggers, bigamists, prenups, breach of promise suits, alimony: it's all here, wrapped up in an engaging and accessible account." — Booklist
"An engrossing account of why individuals have married for reasons other than love and often made that work, but Zug also warns of the dangers to our most vulnerable citizens when policy-makers make legal rights and social benefits that should be available to all contingent on marriage." — Stephanie Coontz, author of Marriage, A History: How Love Conquered Marriage
“You'll Do is a wonderfully fun romp through the history of why people marry. Zug weaves together colonial incest laws, her great-aunt Rosie's marriage designed to help a man escape the Nazis, Saturday Night Live, Jane Austen, contemporary welfare policy -- and more -- to tell the story of the marital bargain. While the common assumption is that people should only marry for love, Zug explains why so many people do not -- and why that decision makes sense.” — Naomi Cahn, author of Marriage Markets