Connected Parenting

Written by: Jennifer Kolari
  • Summary

  • Connected Parenting shares techniques that therapists use to help parents soothe their child as well as enhance the parent-child bond and is based on the understanding that correcting and guiding behavior works best when it is preceded by and linked to empathy. At the heart of this parenting model is the CALM Technique which helps parents accurately attune to children’s affect and experience. These empathic interactions release reward chemicals in the brain that stimulate positive emotions and increase order and balance in the nervous system. Reward chemicals, including natural opiates, endorphins, and a powerful hormone called oxytocin, reduce and inhibit stress hormones and bathe the brain in positive emotions that ripple through every cell in the body. The benefits of empathy and compassion have a strong base in science that cannot be underestimated. Simply put, it is brain food, the emotional nutrition all of us need, perhaps our children most of all. Although many parenting techniques stress the importance of empathy, Connected Parenting will show you how to use it skillfully to repair frayed bonds, deescalate tantrums, contain and correct difficult behaviors and help your child to become more confident and emotionally resilient. We use a collaborative and supportive coaching model and provide inspirational, easy-to-understand techniques grounded in neuroscience and attachment. In the end, your child will be more compliant, more relaxed, and – most importantly – happier. Connected Parenting will bring out the best in you and your child.
    Copyright 2025 Connected Parenting
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Episodes
  • Arguing With A Teenager In The Age Of Social Media | CP196
    Feb 7 2025

    Welcome back, connected parents, to another episode of the Connected Parenting podcast!

    Today, we're tackling a topic that many parents find incredibly frustrating—arguing with a teenager—but with a modern twist: the influence social media has on these conflicts.

    Teenagers have always been challenging to argue with. Conversations can escalate from zero to 100 in seconds, leaving you feeling completely disoriented.

    But in today’s digital world, there’s a new layer—the language of social media-driven psychology. Many teens are now using terms they’ve picked up online, like gaslighting, victim-playing, and toxic behavior, sometimes without fully understanding their meaning.

    While it’s great that mental health topics are more widely discussed, these concepts are often taken out of context and misapplied in everyday parent-teen interactions.

    So how do we navigate these conversations without making things worse?

    In this episode, we’ll dig into building connection, strengthening trust, and helping our teens develop a healthy understanding of the emotions and relationships in their lives.

    Jennifer's Takeaways:

    • Challenges of Arguing with Teenagers in the Age of Social Media (00:00)
    • Understanding the Teenage Brain (03:05)
    • Impact of Social Media on Parent-Teen Interactions (07:12)
    • Navigating Complex Concepts in Parent-Teen Arguments (10:25)
    • Strategies for Staying Calm and Neutral (11:37)
    • The Role of Self-Awareness and Responsibility (17:24)
    • Resources and Support for Connected Parenting (24:33)

    Meet Jennifer Kolari

    

    Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

    Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

    Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

    Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

    One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

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    26 mins
  • Negative Consequences | CP195
    Jan 31 2025

    Negative consequences—while the term might sound harsh, the reality is that some kids truly thrive when they know they are surrounded by sturdy, solid, immovable limits.

    There are certain children, especially strong-willed or "gladiator" kids as I call them, who push back against every boundary—insisting they don’t need rules, testing limits at every turn, and even retaliating when consequences are enforced.

    However, despite their resistance, clear, consistent, and loving boundaries actually make them feel safer and more emotionally regulated.

    If you’ve ever felt guilty about enforcing consequences or struggled to set limits that actually work, this episode is for you. Tune in and learn how to create a structured and supportive environment where your child can thrive.

    Jennifer's Takeaways:

    • Setting the Stage for Negative Consequences (00:00)
    • Understanding Anxiety in Kids (02:06)
    • The Importance of Consistent Limits (04:32)
    • Setting Effective Consequences (06:24)
    • Practical Tips for Implementing Consequences (07:56)
    • Connecting Before Correcting (14:48)
    • Resources and Support for Parents (15:39)

    Meet Jennifer Kolari

    

    Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

    Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

    Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

    Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

    One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

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    17 mins
  • Date Night | CP194
    Jan 24 2025

    Parenting can be a beautiful journey, but it often brings challenges that strain relationships. From the demands of daily life to the push-and-pull dynamics of kids testing boundaries, the connection between parents can sometimes feel like it’s taking a back seat.

    In this week's episode I explore how vital it is to protect and prioritize this bond, emphasizing that a strong relationship between parents doesn’t just benefit you—it’s a gift to your children.

    Kids thrive when they see their parents working as a team, and how division or tension can create stress and confusion in the family dynamic.

    Listen in to learn practical strategies to reconnect, communicate effectively, and maintain a sense of partnership even during the busiest times.

    Whether it’s setting aside time to nurture your relationship, finding ways to support each other even in small ways, or understanding the role of teamwork in parenting, this episode is packed with insights to help you strengthen your parenting partnership and create a harmonious family environment for everyone involved.

    Jennifer's Takeaways:

    • Importance of a United Parental Front (00:00)
    • Challenges in Two-Parent Families (01:21)
    • The Impact of Parental Relationship on Children (02:30)
    • Recognizing and Responding to Bids for Attention (03:56)
    • Changing the Lens and Spending Adult Time Alone (05:39)
    • The Importance of Date Night (07:41)
    • Using the Calm Technique and Avoiding Policing (09:09)

    Meet Jennifer Kolari

    

    Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

    Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

    Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

    Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

    One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

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    10 mins

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wish episodes were longer

just amazing techniques I wish I had this sooner. easy to listen to has really helped.

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