Showing results for "andi arndt" in Comedy & Humor

Call it superstition, but when a guy bats as hot as Brooks Elliott, you don’t mess with what’s working. And what’s working is him keeping his pants zipped and doing all of his scoring on the field. So when I hear he’s planning to ditch his V-card now that he’s been traded to baseball’s lovable losers - a.k.a. my home team and my reason for living every March through October - I do what any rational, dedicated, obsessed fan would do. I make a plan to stop him. But the thing about stopping him is that it requires spending time with him. Lots. And lots. And lots of time.

Out of work for months, Lussi Meyer is desperate to work anywhere in publishing. Prestigious Blackwood-Patterson isn’t the perfect fit, but a bizarre set of circumstances leads to her hire and a firm mandate: Lussi must find the next horror superstar to compete with Stephen King, Anne Rice, and Peter Straub. It’s the ’80s, after all, and horror is the hottest genre. But as soon as she arrives, Lussi finds herself the target of her coworkers’ mean-spirited pranks.

Welcome to Sunset Academy, the most coveted elementary school in Miami Beach, where there are three categories of families: rich, wealthy, and ultra-wealthy. Perfectly tanned and smiling Charlotte Giordani is Sunset Academy’s alpha mom. With a sleek blowout and relentless charm, Charlotte’s brashness serves her well. She’s up for election as the PTA president and is riding high, having just secured a massive donation from billionaire Don Walker and his socialite wife Patricia.

It seems lately that Poppy Lively is invisible to everyone but the IRS. After her accountant absconded with her life savings, newly bankrupt Poppy is on the verge of losing her home when an old flame, now a hotshot producer, gives her a surprising way out: a job in costumes on a Hollywood film set. It’s a bold move to pack her bags, keep secrets from her daughter, and head to Los Angeles, but Poppy's a capable person—how hard can a job in wardrobe be?

Cat McCarthy has spent years extricating herself from the family business—an increasingly run-down theater camp—and all the drama contained within it. At thirty-seven, she’s putting the final touches on a new life as she renovates her dream cottage and awaits her first child. Does it worry her that the McCarthy legacy is in the hands of her disastrously irresponsible sister, Ginger? Sure. But the camp’s not Cat’s problem anymore.

Deacon Hunter is domineering, condescending, and infuriating. And yet I can’t seem to keep my panties on for five minutes when we’re alone together. He keeps melting them right off. With that sexy voice, those confident hands, the way he brings my body wildly to life, he’s proved my libido hasn’t gone into permanent post-divorce hibernation after all.

Rachel Klein is sacked from her job at the White House after she sends an email criticizing Donald Trump. As she is escorted off the premises, she is hit by a speeding car, driven by what the press will discreetly call "a personal friend of the president". Does that explain the flowers, the get-well wishes at a press briefing, the hush money offered by a lawyer at her hospital bedside? Rachel’s recovery is soothed by comically doting parents, matchmaking roommates, a new job as aide to a journalist whose books aim to defame the president, and unexpected love at the local wine store.

It's totally normal to fall in love with an audiobook narrator's voice, right? Right. Just ask Vera, who listens to "her" guy whenever and wherever she can: while driving, working, parenting, cooking, cleaning, showering...you name it. But now, she's bringing him into the bedroom. And her husband is less than pleased.

Annabel Ford has everything under control, devoting her time to her twin boys and keeping her household running smoothly. But when her husband of a decade announces that he's leaving, she's blindsided. And suddenly her world begins to unravel. Piper Whitley has always done her best to balance it all - raising her daughter, Fern, by herself while advancing her career as a crime reporter. Only now that she's finally met the man of her dreams, Fern's absentee father shows up, throwing everything into a tailspin.

Atticus and Neil are the newly crowned "hottest male narration team" for Mmm-Mmm romance, and they're flying high on the praise. Nothing can get them down. Until Vera and Cameron usher a mysterious voice onto the scene and shake the foundation of the audiobook industry itself. In a world where humanity is all we have, can our group of former friends band together to save the future of storytelling? Or are audiobooks destined to be nothing more than a bunch of beep beep boop?

Violet Baumgartner has opened her annual holiday letter the same way for the past three decades. And this year, she's going to throw her husband, Ed, a truly perfect retirement party, one worthy of memorializing in her upcoming letter. But the event becomes a disaster when, in front of 200 guests, Violet learns her daughter, Cerise, has been keeping a shocking secret from her, shattering Violet’s carefully constructed world.

On the same day Bells Walker learns that her IUD has failed, her husband Harry is denied tenure at his Manhattan university. So Bells, Harry, their two adolescent children, and her baby bump move to New York’s Hudson Valley, where Harry has landed a job at Dutchess College in the town of Pigkill. When the farm-to-table utopia Bells envisioned is anything but, she turns to the blogosphere. Under the pen name the County Dutchess, she anonymously dishes about life in Pigkill, detailing the activities of hypercompetitive parents and kombucha-drinking hipsters.

Mellor, mother of 'two darling little angels', tells parents it's time take back their lives. With chapters such as "Bedtime: Is Five-Thirty Too Early?" and "Screaming: Is It Necessary?", the author lays out a plan for parents to enjoy themselves and not be slaves to their children while still offering their kids a warm, nurturing environment. Mellor's advice has a retro twang, and is always wry and often quite funny, standing in sharp contrast to the guidance normally found in books of its kind.

With The Last Days of California, Mary Miller bursts into the literary world, taking up the mantle of Southern fiction and rendering it her own with wry vulnerability and contemporary urgency. Miller’s revelatory protagonist, Jess, is fourteen years old and waiting for the world to end. Her evangelical father has packed up the family and left their Montgomery home to drive west to California, hoping to save as many souls as possible before the Second Coming.