Showing results by author "Paul Jennings" in All Categories

"Help," shouted Chris. "Please. Somebody help." The silent green head had power over him. The cabbage patch curse was too strong. 'Zip.' Down came his fly. "Don't look. Don't look," shouted Chris. "Don't look. Don't look," shouted Ms. Henderson. But it was too late. Chris let fly. Splash, splash, sploosh. It could only happen in a Paul Jennings story, and it does.

"You can't have a party without music," said Dad. "You can't have a fire without smoke," said Whacka. It went from bad to worse after that. A barbecue from hell. Spuds on the roof. A visit from the police. It was war, a fight to the finish between Dad and Whacka. And Chris was right in the middle of it. All because Dad vomited in the cabbage patch. It could only be a Paul Jennings story narrated by Kate Hosking.

"Roy's tiny breaths sounded like milkshake fighting its way up a very thin straw. His eyes were closed. 'Rory', I said. 'Don't die. Don't die.' His eyes fell open. They flicked wildly around. 'The goat', he shouted. I didn't bother looking behind me. I knew there was no goat. And I knew Rory wasn't dying. Not yet."

"This is unbelievable. This is unreal. What is going on here? First I get a toilet seat stuck around my face and now this little parrot is following me around."

Unseen events like... the dead coming back to life...

These endearing characters and funny stories, from bestselling author Paul Jennings, will amuse and delight children and their parents. Great for boosting the confidence and interest of beginner readers when used in conjunction with the print edition. Includes: Rascal and the Hot Air Balloon, Rascal at the Show, Rascal and Little Flora, Rascal and the Cheese.

Trevor knew that the man in the white coat was going to stick a knife into him. He was going to cut open Trevor's belly and take out his appendix. Trevor soon found out that life became a lot more complicated without his appendix. Really crazy things started to happen. Trevor and his appendix just had to be together.

It's unbearable... The bird's perch is swinging to and fro and hitting me on the nose. I can see my eye in its little mirror. Unbearably weird... You have the foulest feet ever. There are flies for lunch. A goat swallows your opal. And you have lived before.

Stare if you dare, into Paul Jennings' wild world. How will you stop a thousand rabbits breeding in your bedroom?

"Can I have a dragon, please, Dad?" The answer is no. Or is it? In Ben's world, dragons exist like dogs and fulfill all the doggy functions with dragon overlays, like having two heads, or being able to fly. The dragons all correspond to various breeds of dog.

Cal and Ricky both stare at the one-eyed seagull. "You wanted food," Ricky whispers. "There it is." "A seagull? You'd eat a seagull?" "I'd eat anythng," says Ricky. "Anything." When Ricky and Cal wag school they bite off more than they can chew.

Singenpoo wanted me to follow. She had written a sign the only way she could. What a relief. What a cat. Singenpoo does a disappearing act. And she might not be back.

"'There he is', Gramps shrieked. 'The Spy. The scumbag spy.' I looked up and saw a monstrous white hairy face disappear into the drain. I had never seen such a frightening sight. White hair covered its entire head. I couldn't even see any eyes. In a flash Gramps splashed into the drain after it."

The dog sniffs Jimmy's legs. Jimmy sniffs the dog's legs. The dog sniffs Jimmy's bottom. Jimmy sniffs... aaargh. Horrible, horrible, horrible. It's a dog?s life for Jimmy when the Gizmo gets really gross. A third Gizmo yarn from Australia's master of madness.

Amy and Sprocket are on a mission - to find her dad and his mum, rescue the baby from the Brats and uncover exactly what is going on inside the mysterious nudist colony. But the truth is even more terrifying than anything they imagined. Uncovering deadly secret after deadly secret, Amy and Sprocket are lured deeper into a mystery that gets more exciting with every minute.

In the second title in the popular Rascal the Dragon series, Rascal goes to the park to learn some tricks to frighten away the Big Bad Cat. But he is not getting the hang of them. "You must scare Big Bad Cat," says Ben. Rascal is such a small dragon, Can he do it?

"Out you go," says Dad. It is cold outside. How can a little dragon get in? Ben's dad won't let Rascal in until he learns how to beg. Rascal has other ideas, and Dad is not happy. Looks like Rascal is in trouble.

Amy and Sprocket are on a mission - to find her dad and his mum, rescue the baby from the Brats and uncover exactly what is going on inside the mysterious nudist colony. But the truth is even more terrifying than anything they imagined. Uncovering deadly secret after deadly secret, Amy and Sprocket are lured deeper into a mystery that gets more exciting with every minute.

Sixteen-year-old Robin lives with his single father in the Victorian Alps where they run a snowmobile hire business. Robin lives in fear of his bullying father and believes that it was his (Robin's) fault that his mother left them when he was a baby, which is why his father hates him and is the cause of all his problems. Robin has a mental condition - a fear of fear. As events unfold he runs from his father, he runs from the girl he loves, he runs into trouble, he runs from himself.

"Charge!" came Gramps' excited voice. I gasped. The frog general was as big as a full-grown cow. He started to roll his tongue back into his mouth. He was going to slurp me up and slide me down his throat.

Oh yuck. The mice were running up my trousers. They wriggled under my shirt. They were even inside my underpants. Mice, madness, and mayhem.