Showing results by narrator "Jessica Almasy" in All Categories

Tom Angleberger scored two critical and popular hits with his Star Wars–inspired The Strange Case of Origami Yoda and Darth Paper Strikes Back. In the hilarious Fake Mustache, young Lenny Flem Jr.’s friend Casper disguises himself with a shockingly convincing handlebar mustache and begins robbing banks, quickly amassing a fortune. Setting his sights on the presidency, Casper is working on plans for world domination—and only Lenny stands in his way.

Melanie Travis loves her teaching job at Connecticut's elite Howard Academy, where plans are underway for a Spring Pageant to honor the school's fiftieth anniversary. Immersed in the preparations, Melanie is hurrying to retrieve a painting of one of the illustrious co-founders when she comes upon a disturbing scene: Eugene Krebbs, the Academy's elderly caretaker is arguing loudly with a girl half his size. Before Melanie can learn more than the girl's first name - Jane - she disappears.

The world of Shiuan was doomed. Rising waters and shattering earthquakes had sealed its fate. The only escape routes were the Gates. And just as this knowledge dawned on the desperate tribes and cities there appeared the woman Morgaine--whose mission was to seal Shiuan's Gates.

Amy is pretty happy living the quiet life at home. She can mine ore, read up on oceanography, hang out with her pet cat. What’s not to love? Her brother, on the other hand . . . Marc is always leaving their village to look for excitement. But when a couple of weeks go by without any word from him, Amy can’t help but worry. Digging around, she discovers Marc has gone off alone in search of someplace called Glory’s Haven, a house deep in the forests where (supposedly) the greatest adventurer their town has ever seen stashed a ton of loot.

I did not order the extra slice of Armageddon to go with my midlife crisis. Apparently, if you’re an Immortal, it comes free of charge. I have until sundown tomorrow to get to a parallel plane of existence, save my family, and kick bad-guy butt all before the world ends. Impossible, right? Not according to my posse of whackado buddies. They like to remind me that nothing is impossible as long as I believe. Well, I’m about to be the mother of all believers.

In the dawn of time, women ruled, and the people had no word for war. Then the horsemen came. Sarama is the last of the White Mare's servants, descended from an ancient line conquered long ago by warrior tribes. Her father is the king of one such tribe. Her twin brother Agni is the king's heir. But she is heir to an older world, and a different way.

The squirrels Jed, TsTs, and Chai are the very best of friends. So when Jed is snatched up by a hawk and carried away to another realm, TsTs and Chai resolve to go after him. New communities are discovered, new friends are made, huge danger is encountered (both man-made and of the fox and bobcat variety) and mysteries are revealed. Nuts to You is wholly original, funny, lively, and thought-provoking.

Everyone's favorite space boy, Hilo, is just settling into life on earth (Bowling? Knock-knock jokes? Outstanding!) when strange portals begin opening up all over town. And holy mackerel! Even stranger creatures are coming through them! But it will take more than a giant mutant chicken, a viking hippo, a magical warrior cat, or even a few million killer vegetables to stop Team Hilo...er, won't it? Can Hilo, DJ, and Gina figure out how to send these creatures back to their worlds before they destroy the Earth?

With her former fiancé off finding himself, Melanie Travis figures the only ring she'll be seeing in the near future is one where she's showing her prized poodles. But love is still in the air for her brother Frank, who is about to tie the knot with his sweetheart, Bertie Kennedy. With scant knowledge of tulle, favors, or cocktail hors d'oeuvres, Melanie happily leaves the nuptial arrangements to Sara Bentley, a fellow dog handler moonlighting as a wedding coordinator.

Come on an adventure with my mermaids and their unlikely heroes. Get three hilarious stories all in one big book. You'll get: Book 1 - Tallulah’s Temptation; Book 2 - Ariel’s Antics; and Book 3 - Misty’s Mayhem.

Not sure who I screwed over in a past life to end up with a heinous mother-in-law who thinks my wedding is for her. If I didn’t love Chance more than myself, I’d rethink the entire hot mess. Problem: I’ve been instructed to show up in Hell on my wedding day with six bridesmaids. I have two friends in total. Problem solved: Go to a supernatural plasticware party at the community center and blackmail a few gals into being bridesmaids. New problem: The gals I coerced bring their own brand of crazy to the party. Whatever. Chance is the demon of my dreams. He loves me, fur and all.

Take off on a new adventure and find out more about what really happened on Hilo's world with HILO--the hilarious, action-packed New York Times bestselling graphic novel series that kids love!

Belle Jamison is finally starting to feel like a normal girl again. Her job as a paranormal investigator is going well, she's learned to control her supernatural abilities (mostly), and she's just gotten engaged to Rome Masters, the ultra-sexy operative who once tried to neutralize her! But planning a wedding is never easy....

Twenty-three-year-old aspiring artist Sophie Walker can think of no better place than the exotic paradise of the Maldives Islands to escape the wrath of her controlling parents, the monotony of her boring legal work, and her passionless boyfriend. With her two best friends along for the ride and to help her find herself again, Sophie is not prepared for the enigmatic Clayton Sinclair. Clayton comes from a world of privilege that seems like a fantasy to Sophie.

Here are the greatest stories of one of the greatest writers working in any genre today. All ten of the stories gathered here are Hugo or Nebula award winners - some even have the distinction of winning both. With a new Introduction by the author and personal afterwords to each story, plus a special look at three of Willis' unique public speeches - this is unquestionably the collection of the season, an audiobook that every Connie Willis fan will treasure.

With DJ and HILO's help, can Gina find the key to turn the world back to what it was? Find out in Hilo 8—a laugh-out-loud, action-packed adventure filled with epic battles! True friendship! Good jokes! Bad jokes! Giant (hilarious) monsters! Spoiled royals! Prophecies! Good! Evil! And much, much more!

When Soul Divider was on the top of the world, so was Ryder Maddox. When the band faded into obscurity, Ryder's luck plummeted with it. In a last ditch effort to rekindle the band's heyday, Soul Divider teams up with powerful vampire clan leader, Talis de Rancourt. In return for her services, the band pays the ultimate price for never ending fame. Now on the run, Melanie meets Ryder in a middle of nowhere hotel. She never expected her teenage rock star crush to be as lost and as in need of a companion as she is.

Welcome to an elite Connecticut kennel club where shocking secrets gnaw at the best of the breed and competition has a sharp - and deadly - bite. As if raising her son Davey, training her rambunctious Poodle Faith for the show ring, and grooming fellow handler Sam Driver for romance aren't enough, Melanie Travis's entre into the exclusive Belle Haven Kennel Club has been met with a grisly murder. Unfortunately, the only witnesses to the crime were the victim's startled pair of Beagles.

I thought being a Demon sucked, but being a Demon Goddess is a whole ’nother level. Life had been so much easier when I was just a forty-year-old has-been actress trying to make a comeback in the land of Botox and BS. For the love of everything absurd, I was just getting used to being a Demon … and BAM … all of a sudden I’m supposed to be one of the two gals in charge? I mean, being the co-star of the show is great until it involves ruling the Darkness with the evil whack job who destroyed my mother.

The rich bloodsuckers don’t want to pay taxes. Too bad, so sad. They’re the least of my problems right now. At the wise suggestion of my beloved mate, I indulge in a little retail therapy so I don’t dismember the pissed-off crew of greedy Vamps who don’t want to pay their fair share. How could a trip to the happiest place on earth a.k.a. Target go wrong? Let me count the ways....