Dean Aulichme
AUTHOR

Dean Aulichme

Comedy & Humor
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Dean Aulichme, a pseudonym, is the creator of Jackwagon Publishing. He's in his 50's and still has all of his adult teeth and suffers from sleep apnea. When not peeing on electric fences or wearing a CPAP machine, Mr. Aulichme (pronounced O-Lick-Me) enjoys playing poker, eating salads, and loves watching YouTube videos of hillbilly dentistry and blowup doll manufacturing. Dean has applied for a provisional utility patent for personal wiping. The prototype was discovered accidentally when he was only 5. Read the book to find out. He is also working on how to effectively use a tennis can for more outdoor uses. He recommends that you only read one of his stories per day as toilet reading material. For most of you this will take one month, my brother could take much longer. Again, read the book. Mr. Aulichme has adopted 3 cats to start his own gourmet coffee business if this book doesn't make it. Apparently you can have cats eat coffee beans and it makes the coffee taste better. Dean enjoys smoking cigars while playing the saxophone, the online urban dictionary, and trimming his arm pits. In his spare time, he has a saltwater pond and is feeding a bluefish 10 times a day to win the next bluefish tournament. Apparently you have to pass a lie detector test after winning. We'll see if the thumb tack in the shoe works. Dean is available for product endorsements for speculums, male urinal sheaths, enema bulbs, and any product affiliated with his writings.
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