This Book Is Full of Spiders
Seriously, Dude, Don't Touch It (John Dies at the End, Book 2)
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This Book Is Full of Spiders
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Narrateur(s):
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Nick Podehl
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Auteur(s):
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David Wong
À propos de cet audio
From David Wong, the writer of the cult sensation John Dies at the End comes another terrifying and hilarious tale of almost Armageddon at the hands of two hopeless heroes.
Warning: You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. THIS IS NOT A METAPHOR.
You will dismiss this as ridiculous fear-mongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fear-mongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection - the creature stimulates skepticism, in order to prevent you from seeking a cure. That's just as well, since the "cure" involves learning what a chainsaw tastes like. You can't feel the spider, because it controls your nerve endings. You won't even feel it when it breeds. And it will breed.
Just stay calm, and remember that telling you about the spider situation is not the same as having caused it. I'm just the messenger. Even if I did sort of cause it. Either way, I won't hold it against you if you're upset. I know that's just the spider talking.
"Like an episode of AMC's "The Walking Dead" written by Douglas Adams of "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy." …Imagine a mentally ill narrator describing the zombie apocalypse while drunk, and the end result is unlike any other book of the genre. Seriously, dude, touch it and read it." –Washington Post
"Kevin Smith's Clerks meets H.P. Lovecraft in this exceptional thriller… David Wong (Jason Pargin) is a fantastic author with a supernatural talent for humor. If you want a poignant, laugh-out-loud funny, disturbing, ridiculous, self-aware, socially relevant horror novel than This Book is Full of Spiders: Seriously Dude, Don't Touch It is the one and only book for you." –SF Signal
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STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why?
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 148
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In a prosperous yet gruesomely violent near future, superhero vigilantes battle thugs whose heads are full of supervillain fantasies. The peace is kept by a team of smooth, well-dressed negotiators called The Men in Fancy Suits. Meanwhile a young girl is caught in the middle and thinks the whole thing is ridiculous. Zoey, a recent college graduate with a worthless degree, makes a reluctant trip into the city after hearing that her estranged con artist father died in a mysterious yet spectacular way.
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Colton Beck has six months to live. He works for the Angor near Los Angeles, aware that any day could be his last. The Angor arrived twenty years ago, resolved to help mankind survive, but not everyone believes their motives are honorable. When the Angor offer humanity a colony world, Colton is determined to see another planet before his final breath. He's been diagnosed with Xeno, a rare disorder that surfaced with the Angor's arrival, but he won't let this stop him.
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Ce que les auditeurs disent de This Book Is Full of Spiders
Moyenne des évaluations de clientsÉvaluations – Cliquez sur les onglets pour changer la source des évaluations.
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire4 out of 5 stars
- Thomas Scotland
- 2023-02-20
Beavis and Butthead Do The Appocolypse
I really enjoyed this book. If you enjoyed the first one, it goes along with it thematically, but it doesn't rely on it. I loved the premise behind it certain plot points Amy and David going through this entire ordeal by trying to find each other, for instance.
There's a certain group of people (of which I am one) who will enjoy these books. It requires a certain suspension of disbelief, and enjoying knee slapping potty humor sprinkled into an apocalyptic scenario that David, John, and Amy go through. If that's your thing, welcome to the club!
Some argue that there isn't much character growth, but that's simply untrue. In between the first book and this, Amy has grown from being agoraphobic, to a well fleshed out character with a heart of Gold and a Moral Compass. John seems to be spiralling downward while growing more stoic. David is just, David+ love life.
To enjoy these books, just chill out, and realize it's not meant to fit in with timeless classics. It stands on its own for those ready to face the Apocalypse, but would rather see it through the Lens of bumbling, potty mouth characters in David and John. Amy is the mature one of the bunch, so it kind of creates an equilibrium between the silly and the serious.
The hard need to be asking here is, just how many lives does a dog have?
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Merlin
- 2021-04-10
BEST NARRATOR EVER
Absolutely amazing; perfectly written, and perfectly performed. Now I've found both my new favorite author, AND new favorite reader!
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 2023-07-05
Super funny
Good story. Love Molly what a good girl. It’s not a regular horror story but refreshingly new like you actually know people in your lives like Dave & John.
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Matthew Harnden
- 2018-09-19
Seriously, Dude, Do listen to it
Very entertaining, funny, and amazing narration, I could not stop listening to it.
Definitely the best of the trilogy and you don't need to listen to the first book before, they each stand alone well.
Check it out!
#Audible1
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2 les gens ont trouvé cela utile
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Jody Plank
- 2019-11-12
So Kool, really great writing
In the first few chapters there where a few things that made me roll my eyes. But very quick it turn into one of the best books iv ever listened to. The wrighter doesn't take short cuts to get to the end. Many times you think how is he gonna end this. But he gets there in a believable way. (well believable for fiction anyway) love the characters. Wow if I could wright books. This is what I'd write
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Madison
- 2020-08-31
my favourite audiobook
The story is hilarious but it is absolutely brought to life by Nick. Love this fun adventure love the characters, the plot, everything holy recommend if you are into spooky, gory, supernatural stories that are also hilarious and ridiculous.
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- mason
- 2023-10-22
AMAZING !!!!!!!!!
This book had me crying, cackling, & wincing all at the same time. I am yet to find a book i enjoy more this takes my #1 spot :)
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Adam Watkins
- 2018-03-05
just get it. unique and very well performed.
my heading says it all. the voice actor is great, not the best but every character sounds unique n you won't be getting lost.
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1 personne a trouvé cela utile
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Au global4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Histoire4 out of 5 stars
- Tony
- 2018-09-10
Dread, Doom, and Dumb-asses
Weaker than the first book in some ways but a lot stronger in others, this book is a great sequel to the first. Some aspects of the book feel a bit like they changed the rules from the first. Some of the character traits seemed slightly altered without giving us any real reasoning, but what the book does right makes up for it in the end.
Throughout the book there is a countdown to panic and dread, and it is one of my favourite things about the book. You are constantly reminded that things are going to get worse. But instead of getting worse, they get worse than you expected, and you more or less have the same people trying to work through it as the first book. (Imagine the town you're in has one of those nuclear missile strike alarm buzzers go off. That kind of dread and uncertainty, except when the countdown ends you look at your phone and a spider jumps out of it and eats your face)
This book is not as insane as the first, so don't go in expecting that. It is far more "normalized". Instead of fist fights with moustache bats and talking hotdogs you get "what if those same guys were thrown into a zombie apocalypse" and really, it seldom disappoints. If you have read the first one, I highly recommend going through this one as well.
#Audible1
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1 personne a trouvé cela utile
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Au global5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 2024-11-02
That damn soy sauce!
If you loved the first book, you’ll love this one.
There was never a dull moment in the book at all.
The narrator did an awesome job as well
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