When I started going to sobriety meetings, I didn’t understand why people said, “keep coming back.” Very little made sense to me back then. I was desperate and scared, and nothing anyone said seemed to change how I felt. I was listening, I was taking suggestions, but I didn’t see how just showing up to meetings was supposed to do anything. But I kept going anyway out of desperation, and I heard people share about their own fear and desperation, and then their strength and hope. If their fear could evolve into hope, why couldn’t mine?

So, I kept coming back. Even when sat in my recliner on Saturday mornings telling myself I didn’t want to go, I would get up, put one foot in front of the other, and go anyway. Those tiny actions built the momentum to get me where I needed to go. The more I listened, I related in and feared what could happen if I drank again. I heard people talk about faith, that it didn’t have to look like anyone else’s, and that’s when mine started growing too. I realized that going to meetings was connecting with others just like me and getting honest with myself. Now, when I hear “keep coming back,” I know what it means. It means who I am today will evolve when I keep showing up for life and remain open to help and honest about how I feel.

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